Things From Tumblr
by Nyodrite
Summary: 4. Puberty:Kakashi-senpai rubbed his face tiredly muttering an "I haven't killed nearly enough people to deserve this" before speaking to him. "No, kohai, you are not going to die. What you, uh, reported is normal for males to experience around your age." - "How can it be normal?" Tenzo made a face at the thought of bedwetting being normal.
1. First Mission & What Went Wrong

So I have been on tumblr (same name) and have kind of just realized I could be putting things from there on here so. Here we are: "Things From Tumblr".

.

 **First Mission**

 **.**

* * *

.

"Isn't this exciting?" Minato asked his little five-year-old student of two days. "Our first mission as a team! Are you ready Kakashi-chan?"

The boy nodded, mask stretching and wrinkling from the face the boy pulled at the 'chan', "Yes, Minato-sensei."

Sensei. Minato loved being called that even if he had only been able to be called it a handful of times. "Right. Our first mission, D51C, is-"

"Sensei," his little student interrupted, "The i-den-tea-fee-kay-shun-" he hid a grin here at the boy sounding out the word carefully, his student was adorable. "Says that it's '52E35-1C', why call it D51C?"

"Because, Kakashi-chan," Minato answered, trying to mimic his old Academy teacher's tones to create his own Sensei Voice- Shodai knows that his sensei never had one. "When you get more missions under you belt- ah, that is when you have taken more missions-" he added hurriedly when the boy peered curiously at his waist as if he literally had missions there. "Then referring to them by both class and ID become tedious, as the higher the mission rank the more complex the identification becomes, thus shinoi tend to refer to them by the letter of their class, the first number of their ID along with the last number and letter of their ID."

The little Hatake blinked thoughtfully, "But…wouldn't it be easier to just have that to i-den-tiff-eye them then?"

"Perhaps." He allowed, "But remember, there are hundreds of thousands of missions taken each year for each rank plus the years before them so the length expands the more time passes and the more missions of each rank are given."

The mask stretched into a frown that bordered on a pout, "That's dumb. Why can't they be reused a few years later? The shinobi who completes the mission is noted isn't it? Wouldn't it work since different shinobi would be taking the mission?"

"You're thinking too much, Kakashi-chan. It's just how it works." He laughed, ignoring the part of him that wondered why they didn't do things like that- Shodai knows how long mission identifications for A-Ranks will be in a few decades, maybe enough to earn an entire page to write out. "Anyways, back to our mission. The mission is…"

The boy's eyes shined with excitement and he felt somewhat bad when he finished with "…to babysit Nonaka Riku-chan!" and the light wilted away- not entirely though, it was a Sensei's guilty pleasure breaking the news to genin about the realities of D-Ranked missions.

Kakashi-chan was silent for a beat before hesitantly asking, "How old is Nonaka Riku?"

"Riku-chan is four years old." He answered.

A longer silence before, "…Sensei…I-…I don't think this is a good idea…"

"Nonsense, it'll be fine!" Minato waved off, with luck his student would make a new friend. "What could go wrong?"

 **.:.**

 **What Went Wrong (Basically)**

 **.:.**

"Nya! I don't have to listen to you! You're just a kid!"

"I am a shinobi! And you _will_ get in the shower **right now you-" *Killing Intent***

 _"Waaaah!"_

"Kakashi-chan!"

"…sorry Sensei…"

"You're a big meanie face!"

"Am not!"

 _"Are too!_

"Am not!"

 **"Are too!"**

"I am not and that doesn't even make sense you- you- _you stupid-head!"_


	2. Time Travel - Cousin

**Time Travel - Cousin**

 **.**

* * *

.

"Watch out!" Kakashi called down to the blond down below.

Said blond snatched the lamp before it hit, glancing up as he held the object and the Hatake caught sight of the headband as the boy spoke. "This yours?"

"Aa." He called affirmatively, watching the blond make quick work of the stairs. "Sorry about that," he apologized, firmly ignoring his 'sixth sense' that squirmed happily in response to the blond with a sense of _:friend, kin, pack:_. Than, louder, added, "My cousin is a clumsy oaf."

A grin flickered over the boy's face when Sakumo- his Niisan in every way that mattered- popped his head out of Kakashi's new apartment, "Oi! I am not clumsy! I am a shinobi-"

" _'A Jōnin, the legendary White Fang of Konohagakure!'_ " He parroted dully, "I know. And you spend too much time with Jiraiya, you never used to announce yourself. How Kaori-nēchan deals with such undeserved arrogance I'll never know…"

Than, while his cousin sputtered, addressed the blond. "Thank you for keeping it intact." He said, smiling with his eyes as he reclaimed the lamp. "I am Hatake Kakashi, chūnin."

"Namikaze Minato, chūnin." the blond returned, eying Sakumo with interest and a bit of awe but saying nothing about the twenty-one year old. "You're moving in?"

The _'rather than staying at the Hatake Compound'_ was left unsaid but Kakashi, most likely due to feel of _:pack:_ , answered. "Maa, Sakumo-niisan and Kaori-nēchan are trying for a whelp- I figured I should give them some…ah…space." He suppressed a shudder at the thought of seeing, hearing or even smelling the two together in a decidedly intimate way.

"Congratulations, then, Hatake-sama." Minato offered politely.

Sakumo, whom was eying the blond interestedly due to Kakashi's offering of information, waved the boy off. "Sakumo is fine, Tōsan was Hatake-sama."

"Sakumo-sama then." the blond affirmed, resolutely keeping the honorific. "Kakashi-kun, I wish you luck with moving." The twelve year old nodded before departing.

His cousin took the opportunity to look at him with a raised eyebrow, "Since when are you so talkative, Kashi-chan?"

"He feel's like pack." the ten year old answered simply, as if that was all that was needed.

For Sakumo, though, it was. "Aa. Well, come on- Kaori will be waiting for us by now."

"Maa, if you weren't so clumsy we'd have been done sooner." He retorted easily.

* * *

 **Alternatively the time travel ficlet where Kakashi doesn't _know_ the future but get's 'feelings' about things.**


	3. Crossover - Hogwarts, Reborn

**Crossover - Hogwarts, Reborn**

 **.**

* * *

.

"May my friend and I sit here?" Green eyes implored him to answer positively.

Kakashi, sentimental enough to connect green eyes to Sakura and red hair to Kushina, really had only one answer. "By all means, sit."

The girl flashed a smile as she pulled out of the compartment to call out "Sev! I found one!" before dragging her trunk in with her and proceeding to struggle with putting it up.

Smiling behind his scarf at the muttering that reminded him of an annoyed Uzumaki, he got up and helped her- noting a dark haired, sour-faced boy entering as they wrestled her trunk into place. "Want help with your trunk before I sit down?"

"I can handle it." the boy snapped out and Kakashi sat, noting that the girl was able to help without scorn.

Red hair smiled, "Thank you for helping, I am Lily Evans and this is my friend Severus Snape."

"Maa, I can't turn my back on a pretty girl in need now can I?" He questioned cheerfully before introducing himself. "Sirius Black, Miss Evans- may I say that it is the utmost pleasure to meet you?"

Evans' eyes narrowed even as she flushed slightly, Snape looking mulish. "Don't think flattery will get you into my good books Mr. Black, it is quite the opposite actually."

"Shame." Kakashi mock-mourned before asking. "You're civilian-raised?"

She paused at that, Snape's brow furrowed in confusion before clearing only to cloud over in protective anger that was waiting to be unleashed, then asked, "Do you mean muggle-born?"

"Yes." he said, smothering a wince at the slip; spending a lifetime thinking of people as either shinobi or civilians (with the odd samurai) made him think in terms of magical and civilian rather then wizard and muggle.

The girl blinked, face clouding over as she glanced at her friend before sticking her chin into the air stubbornly. "Yes I am, is that a problem Mr. Black?"

"Not particularly." he answered easily, "But you probably should ask one of the nicer adults to put a feather-light charm on your trunk so it doesn't give you so much trouble next time."

Evans let out a small "Oh." as Snape's face reddened slightly, probably as he didn't think of it, before she rallied. "You come from an all wizard family? Um, a 'clean-blood' I think?"

"Pureblood." he corrected. "Yes I am, the Blacks are a Most Ancient and Noble family. Do you know about the Houses? Where you wish to be sorted?"

She accepted the topic change though Snape tensed even further. "I do know of them, Sev has told me a lot about Hogwarts. I'd want to be in Ravenclaw- I think having people who could challenge me intellectually would be good for me. Sev wants to go to Slytherin since it was his mum's House. What about you?"

"My family have all been sorted into Slytherin, no Black hasn't gone there." he said in place of an answer. "Which class are you looking forwards to the most?"

Snape, who was doing a remarkable impression of an Uchiha, bit out a swift "Defense Against the Dark Arts." at his friend's prompting.

"Charms." Evans answered promptly. "It's just seems so interesting and versatile!"

Kakashi hummed in acknowledgement. "It is, though I am looking forwards to Transfiguration more."

He kept a steady conversation going for nearing an hour before retreating to his side of the compartment, stirring briefly to buy a snack of licorice wands from the trolley, to read Malecrit's _'Hélas, Je me suis Transfiguré mes Pieds'_ that Grandmother Black bought in celebration of his Hogwarts letter- as the entire family had been rather pleased having thought, due to his control learned from chakra usage, he was a squib until then. He kept an ear on the two but, as it mainly consisted of equal scolding _("Really, Sev, you should act more friendly!" "You need to be careful Lily, we got lucky with Black but not all Purebloods are kind to muggle-borns.")_ , he paid it little attention in the wake of deciphering the story written in a language he had barely started learning (it was a hit and miss of what he got but he had always been rather stubborn).

"First years?" a teen in uniform that had red and gold added said, popping into their compartment shortly before the train had started slowing down. "Well, you're all already dressed so you don't have to worry about that. We'll be arriving shortly, leave your stuff on the train- it'll be in your dorm once you've been sorted. You'll be called upon getting off, firsties go a different way than the rest so be sure to keep an ear out lest you get lost."

Evans near vibrated in nervous tension as the train came to a stop, clutching onto a pale-faced Snape as they disembarked, Kakashi followed them as he continued reading- internally bemoaning the lack of Icha Icha- noting that there quite a few first year students.

"Firs' years!" a giant of a man boomed. "Firs' years to me!"

They were led to the edge of a lake where small boats sat, scrambling into them where in the three of them were joined by a quiet boy who muttered a quick "Remus Lupin" at Evans' prodding before hunching into himself in silence and scurrying away as soon as they reached land. They were handed over to a stern-looking woman that was addressed as Professor McGonagall whom escorted them as she told the that they were to be sorted shortly, they were to behave and that they were capable of earning- or losing- points for their House before disappearing just long enough for ghosts to introduce themselves.

He suspected the entire thing was scripted and rehearsed.

"Come now," McGonagall said, ushering them onwards. "The sorting ceremony is about to begin."

There were a lot of people, students segregated by House tables with staff overlooking them at their table, but even more candles floating above to act as light (idly he wondered at the odds of getting hit by dripping candle wax) and beneath the ceiling that acted much like a window to show the weather outside. What drew his attention was the hat that sat upon a stool, the brim opening to form a mouth and then proceeded to sing. If he were to be honest, it was frightening that children were routinely subjected to it- child soldiers shinobi may raise but a child's mind was a place not touched.

"Abbott, Michael!"

A blond boy scrambled onto the stool where McGonagall set the hat upon his head and the hat's brim wrinkled in thought before wrenching open to shout "HUFFLEPUFF!" and sending Abbott running to the cheering table.

Edgar Bones also went to Hufflepuff but Ali Bashir went to Gryffindor while Rachel Bagshot and Bathsheda Babbling went to Ravenclaw- Alvik Avery and his cousin, Narcissa Black, went to Slytherin before it was his turn.

"Black, Sirius!"

Kakashi took his seat, noting that only Slytherin was paying attention and he amused himself with the thought of how shocked everyone will be of a Black not going to Slytherin. Naruto would be proud of such a prank.

 _"Oh,"_ the Sorting Hat murmured in surprise. _"This is new. A reincarnation! A ninja one from a different world at that!"_

 _"I was told that this would remain confidential."_ He stated mentally, deciding to address the entire thing as he would a Yamanaka whom had gone into his mind.

The hat was indignant, _"What I learn is kept to myself! Not even the Founders learned what I found! I am here to sort not gossip!"_

 _"Peace, Hat-san."_ Kakashi interrupted. _"I had to be certain, a Shinobi's paranoia has carried on with me I am afraid. "_

 _"Indeed."_ It allowed. _"I see that you have no intention of going to Slytherin and, while you would fit in well there, I agree that it wouldn't help for what you have in mind- the same could be said for Ravenclaw. Gryffindor or Hufflepuff would be best…hmm…you are brave but I do not think Gryffindor would be best- your 'shinobi paranoia' would not do well with that kind of attention. You are loyal and hold that quality above all others, for all your genius you are also hardworking- a safe haven will be good for you, maybe you can come to embrace and accept this life. Yes, I am certain that you belong in_ HUFFLEPUFF!"

The word was shouted aloud and the hat manage to murmur _"Good luck Kakashi. Head east when you can, you may feel more at home there."_ before McGonagall got over her shock enough to take the hat.

He walked to his table in silence, glad that his grin was hidden.

Andromeda Black broke the stillness with her clapping, prompting her younger sister Narcissa to politely clap though the eldest Black sister, Bellatrix, remained stubbornly silent- Hufflepuff followed their example until McGonagall continued with the sorting.


	4. Puberty

**Puberty**

 **.**

* * *

.

"It's two A.M. Tenzo," Kakashi-senpai was secure enough around Tenzo that he didn't force himself into the state of instant alertness that he had when they had first met, thus his senpai was sleepy- a thing that very few got to see beyond the farce he sometimes adopted.

"Senpai," Tenzo pleaded.

Kakashi-senpai regarded him a moment before sighing and letting him inside, becoming more aware as he slipped into the apartment. "What is it?"

"I think I'm experiencing a delayed reaction to one of the experiments." Tenzo informed the other seriously, if not a bit fearfully.

His senpai snapped into attention and barked out, "Report!"

"I have grown- ears, hands, feet, penis and testicles. I've gotten taller, bulkier, stronger and my shoulders have broaden. My voice has been breaking at random intervals. Hair has appeared on my face, under my arms and near my penis. I have developed an unpleasant smell, have experienced skin irregularities and earlier I wet the bed- except it wasn't pee." Here he turned red, "Am I going to die!?"

Kakashi-senpai rubbed his face tiredly muttering an "I haven't killed nearly enough people to deserve this" before speaking to him. "No, kohai, you are not going to die. What you, uh, reported is normal for males to experience around your age."

"How can it be normal?" Tenzo made a face at the thought of bedwetting being normal.

"Ah," a hand ran through silver hair before he got an answer. "You are becoming an adult now and your body is maturing from that of a boys into that of a mans. Girls go through something similar when they start becoming women."

Tenzo frowned, "But why does my body need to mature to be a man?"

"So you can make babies." Was the blunt answer before he was being pushed from the apartment, "If you want to know that, come back at a more reasonable hour. Goodnight Tenzo."


	5. Multi-Crossover - HP, SPN, YYH & Bleach

**Multi-Crossover - Harry Potter, Supernatural, Yu Yu Hakusho, Bleach & Naruto**

 **.**

* * *

.

 **Houses**

 **.:.**

"Hatake, Kakashi!"

This, Kakashi firmly believed, was the oddest order he had ever gotten- beating even Sensei's order to stalk the man's pregnant wife- seeing as he was transformed into an eleven year old, sent to a country he hadn't even known and made to learn magic.

"HUFFLEPUFF!"

.

"Hitsugaya, Toshiro!"

Seven years. Toshiro couldn't believe that he had been ordered to masquerade as a human child for seven years.

"RAVENCLAW!"

.

"Laufeyson, Loki!"

Gabriel resisted the urge to cackle, it had taken cashing in a few favors but he was certain that the chaos he could sow in a magic castle would be well worth it.

"GRYFFINDOR!"

.

"Minamino, Shuichi!"

In exchange for seven favors from Koenma, Kurama supposed that seven years of schooling wasn't an inconvenience. Admittedly, it helped that the school was a magical one- as he had never been able to get past the wards against yōkai to interact with the magical populous and thus fairly curious about it.

"SLYTHERIN!"

 **.:.**

 **Wand Woods**

 **.:.**

Kurama;

 _Aspen Wood_ : The proper owner is often an accomplished duelist for it is particularly suited for martial magic. Owners are generally strong- minded and determined, more likely then most to be attracted by quests and new orders.

 _Pine Wood_ : Chooses an independent, individual who may be perceived as a loner, intriguing and perhaps mysterious. They enjoy being used creatively and will adapt unquestioningly to new methods and spells. Many insist they detect and preform best for owners with destined for long lives- one of the most sensitive to non-verbal magic.

Gabriel;

 _Dogwood:_ Quirky and mischievous, they have playful natures and insist on owners who can provide them with fun and excitement. It is wrong to assume that they are unable to preform serious magic; known to preform outstanding spells under difficult conditions and, paired with a suitably clever and ingenious owner, can produce dazzling enchantments. Many refuse to cast non-verbal spells and are often rather noisy.

 _Spruce:_ Requires a firm hand as it often appears to have it's own ideas about what magic it should use. When it meets it's match- which tends to be a bold spell-caster with a good sense of humor- it becomes a superb helper, intensely loyal to their owners and capable of producing particularly flamboyant and dramatic effects.

Toshiro;

 _Ash Wood:_ Those best suited to it are not easily swayed from their beliefs or purposes. The ideal owner may be stubborn, and certainly courageous, but never crass or arrogant.

 _Poplar Wood:_ "If you seek integrity, search first among the poplars" - This wood is one to rely upon, of consistency, strength and uniformed power. Happiest when working with an owner of clear moral vision.

Kakashi;

 _Beech Wood:_ The true match, if young, will be wise beyond their years and, if full-grown, rich in understanding and experience. Preform weakly for the narrow-minded and intolerant. When properly matched, capable of a subtlety and artistry rarely seen.

 _Fir Wood:_ The survivor's wand- this wood, coming from them most resilient of trees, produces wands that demand staying power and strength of purpose in their owners and are poor tools for the changeable and indecisive. Particularly suited for transfiguration and favors owners of focused, strong-minded and, occasionally, intimidating demeanor.

 **.:.**

 **Kakashi**

 **.:.**

Arriving at the 'Leaky Cauldron' on August 14, Kakashi had been able to put off buying his school supplies for two weeks, instead opting to hole up in his rented room go through multiple books he had purchased upon arrival to learn as much as he could about this world he had been forced into by his Hokage. As it was the 28th of August, four days from his departure, he decided that he would rather have everything he needed packed away now so there wouldn't be any unnecessary complications come September 1st.

Thus Kakashi was forced to brave the wizarding population whom were either gossiping over the convict Black's escape or muttering about his hair color and mask (the Sharingan eye would have been added if not for the contacts that were developed just for him to blend in).

He got the uniform first, smothering a wince of revulsion as he was measured for a black robe with a matching pointed hat, the boy getting fitted along side him had no qualms with making his displeasure known, "It's like wearing a freaking dress with a stupid hat."

"Maa, at least they didn't decide on a kilt." Kakashi said, using this as an opportunity to look at the other.

The boy was maybe an two and a half centimeters shorter then Kakashi's current height, with brownish-blond hair pulled back from his face, the end of a sucker hanging from the boy's mouth and golden eyes that grew sharper during Kakashi's assessment- his gut warn him against being on this person's bad side.

The feeling disappeared when the other spoke, teasing, "That's a shame, I'm sure you would have the legs for it."

"I'll take that as a compliment and a warning for my virtue." Kakashi retorted.

The boy smirked, "Loki Laufeyson."

"Kakashi Hatake." he introduced, remembering the custom here even as his gut growled lie at the name given.

 **.:.**

 **Gabriel**

 **.:.**

Gabriel had to say that he had simply expected to amuse himself with messing with a bunch of children and the school's staff, he hadn't predicted that there would be others smuggling themselves into a magic schoolboy passing themselves off as children.

Then he met Kakashi in the robe shop.

At first glance he had assumed that a man's soul was possessing a child's body, but a quick skim revealed the man had been de-aged…and that this man was a killer.

Further digging revealed to him that the man was a shinobi from the land that Gabriel's father had hidden in a kind of quarantine fro the world and he reigned himself in- though the man's spirit tensed even as the body did not react, a good shinobi then- and teased the other. He did not expect the other to offer a retort that almost made him laugh- that did make him introduce himself with and make plans to do their school shopping together.

(Part of him was curious to how else Kakashi's soul would react opposed to his body.)

"Maa," Kakashi said after Gabriel had spotted their final text book. "What keen eyes you have."

Gabriel sent the man-disguised-as-a-child a leer, "All the better to admire you with, my dear."

"You flatter me, oh golden one." his companion deadpanned. "If you continue as such, I may faint from all the blood rushing to my head."

He deliberately took it wrong, looking at the other's crotch and exaggeratedly licked his lips, "What a shame that would be for you to be so…unresponsive."

"Indeed." Kakashi snorted in amusement.

The shopkeeper looked absolutely scandalized as he accepted their stacks, but said nothing more then the cost. "13 Galleons per stack."

"I got this, my dear." Gabriel said, flashing a winsome smile as a hand dug into his pocket, pulling out a handful of galleons that came into existence with a thought.

The shopkeeper counted out the handful, twenty-nine as the odds were unlikely that a human would just automatically grab the right amount, and handed back the excess. The shinobi gave a mock-coy look, though the soul seemed to watching the man's reaction more then his, "I should hope you do not believe to be that easy."

"Of course not," his smile grew into a grin, "You're they classy type, so obviously I will take you to dinner before dragging you into the alleyway and having my wicked way with you behind the dumpster."

The other snorted, "It better be a damn good dinner if you want to get that far."

"Only the best for you." Gabriel promised, even as he thought that this would be the start of an interesting friendship- if anything, they could probably give the staff members heart attacks.

 **.:.**

 **Kurama**

 **.:.**

"So I see. Will you carry my books also?" a voice asked as Kurama walk by the store he had purchased his textbooks earlier.

Kurama glanced through the open door, spying a boy with silver hair and a mask moving to leave with a blond whom was juggling his books to unwrap a sucker- cherry if the red coloring were any indication- and place it in his mouth.

The blond responded, the masked one spoke earlier then, without missing a beat. "I wouldn't insult you to think to presume you, such a strong and an independent specimen as yourself, would require me to do such an act."

The two passed him, bantering good-naturedly, if a bit inappropriately as they headed towards the Apothecary and Kurama put them out of his mind as he went to 'Magical Menagerie'- they were odd, but he had no need to concern himself with them just yet.


	6. A Long Fall

**A Long Fall**

 **.**

* * *

.

In another world Hatake Sakumo returns three days before the estimated time needed, a solemn Jōnin trailing and a wounded chūnin in his arms. In that world he would have rushed immediately to the hospital and would have later met the small yet thankful family of the chūnin he'd saved. In that world he would have trusted his Jōnin teammate to report as he waited for his kohai to receive news that she, while alive, would never be able to continue her kunoichi lifestyle and in that world a Jōnin with a seal on his tongue would stand before a grim yet hesitantly hopeful war council and firmly destroy that hope as he spoke of the team leader's choice to abandon the mission.

In that world Hatake Sakumo would return home late, guilty over the failure (in both the mission and protecting his kohai enough to save her career) but overall pleased that he'd managed to return everyone alive. In that world he would return to a dark, quiet house with a covered bowl of Tendon sitting in a crude seal array that had kept it warm enough him to eat immediately and he would grin because he _knew_ how his son hated anything fried so for the little chūnin to make something with Tempura would have been entirely for _his_ benefit and that, _that_ would be enough to ease any lingering guilt entirely. In that world he would eat dinner alone by candle light then quietly clean up after himself, he would take a moment on his way to his room to check on his son- he would see rumpled casual clothes that must have been put on after training and a thin wrap of bandages on the left forearm, he would hear deep breaths and soft snoring that Kakashi only allowed at home (he would also use a little chakra to let himself hear the soft yet steady **_thump-thump_ ** of his son's heart), he would smell the plain Inuzuka-made soap along with dried blood and know that his son was showered and that the bandage was nothing to be concerned about- before falling asleep in his uniform, smile quirking at his mouth with the knowledge that he would be scolded for it in the morning.

In that world a council would be fuming over a lost chance, a Hokage would understand the choice even as he too worried over the lost chance and a Jōnin with a seal on his tongue would be satisfied with a successful mission. In that world a man would be pleased with how his plans are moving along, a chūnin would be mourning as her family rejoiced, a father and son would share the hopes of stealing time spent together before being called away by clashing schedules.

In that world things were not perfect but that night, the vast majority would go to sleep content and happy.

* * *

 **Is it odd that this ending _really hurt_ to write knowing what comes next?**

 **(Also this is really part of something else, a "what if" comparison, but here because I reread it and saw it could stand alone)**


	7. Day 1

**Day 1**

 **.**

* * *

.

 _"…you have 365 days to ensure the continuation of the Hatake bloodline…"_

That sentence ran through Kakashi's head repeatedly as he stumbled his way into a bar- knowing that the amount of liquor he kept at his apartment wouldn't be nearly enough for him to deal with the fact that he was ordered to become a fath- _settle dow- **dammit-**_

He couldn't even manage the thought. Nearing six drinks in, his nerves were calmed enough for him to start seriously considering the task ahead of him.

It couldn't be stranger as that would take years for him trust another to even consider having a child with them. But there were very few females around Kakashi's age that he knew enough to obtain thoughts of them being potential candidates;

Hosono Ayame who was two years younger then him at age nineteen, the daughter of Hosono Teuchi- he knew her from when he ate at her father's restaurant, Ramen Ichiraku.

Inuzuka Hana also age nineteen and daughter of the Inuzuka Clan Head, Tsume- her he knew from when he took his ninken to get their health checked.

Kato Shizune, age twenty-five and medic-nin training under Tsunade- he met her as a child before she followed her teacher from the village and they sporadically kept in contact through letters (Shizune was unacceptable as she wasn't in the village and unlikely to return unless Tsunade decided to).

Mitarashi Anko a year younger then him, a swiftly rising star in T&I- he met her back when she first started out in the division, dragging in a missing-nin for interrogation.

Oribe Sukui, twenty-one years old and a medic-nin whom made a name for herself in R&D during the war- her he met when he delivered news of Rin's death, she brought him a bento now and then when she joined him during his vigils at the Memorial Stone.

Uzuki Yūgao who was twenty and not even considered as she was the closet thing he had to a little sister since she was part of his ANBU squad and therefore forever his little kohai.

Yuhi Kurenai, three years older and entirely off limits because of Asuma- who he knew thanks to Asuma.

Which meant that there were really only three potential candidates- a civilian, a medic-nin and kunoichi whom specialized in torture.

This swiftly brought his drinks up to ten. When he wondered if this meant he was to marry, he quickly lost count of the number of drinks he had.

* * *

 **Because there always needs to be a 365 challenge/romcom bit.**


	8. Roomate

**Roomate**

 **.**

* * *

.

The crowed cheered when he accepted the hat and his friends jeered when he moved into the Hokage mansion but, now, in a house that amplified his loneliness to proportions that his tiny apartment from before had never been able to, he could no longer keep his smile on his face.

Silence filled the place aside from him clunking around in the kitchen, more out of a desire to drive the oppressing loneliness away then from any want for food, until he turned and nearly jumped out of his skin when he saw Kakashi-sensei quietly sitting at the table, reading his book.

"S-sensei!?"

Kakashi-sensei's eye crinkled cheerfully, "Yo, Naruto." he paused, then almost as if thinking aloud. "Though I should get into the habit of calling you Hokage-sama now, hmm?"

"No! That'd be too weird! Besides- hat or not, you're still my sensei!" Naruto pulled a face at the thought of not only Kakashi-sensei but all his friends calling him Hokage-sama rather then Naruto.

The lone eye became akin to a smile and Naruto got the distinct feeling that he was being made fun of, "Alright then, Naruto." And with that the man went back to reading as if nothing had happened.

"Uh, Sensei…?"

The man didn't even look up. "Hmmm?"

"What are you doing here?"

Sensei eyed him, "I live here."

"W-what? But I live here!" he tried to explain.

His sensei hummed, "So you do." A beat of silence, confused on his part, before the man raised an eyebrow. "Well, are you going to make dinner? The rest will be over soon with their stuff and are sure to be hungry- Sakura especially since she would have just gotten off a shift at the hospital."

Naruto was still confused but the joy from the revelation that he wasn't going to be alone made him not care as he started making dinner, though he turned back once, "Thanks, Sensei."

"Maa," Sensei waved the gratitude away with humor, "You were always the odd one- thanking a man for breaking into your home." Then, a bit devious, with a leer, "Unless you enjoy men showing up in your home at night, hmm?"

He turned red, tossing the spoon he was holding at his sensei, "Pervert!"


	9. Jiraiya's Shop

**Jiraiya's Shop**

 **.**

* * *

.

"C'mon kid," Jiraiya wheedled, "Just do me this one, tiny, itsy-bitsy favor, yeah? Watch the shop for me while I go out of town? I'll owe you one."

Minato crossed his arms as he looked at the thirty-nine year old attempting, and failing, to sway him with 'puppy-dog eyes', "Are you going to pay me for the work?"

"Aw, don't be-" his honorary uncle winced when he raised an unimpressed eyebrow, " _Fine_. I'll pay you! Will you do it?"

"Make it more then minimum wage, you cheap-skate, and you got yourself a deal." He confirmed, stance unmoving as the man whined before giving in.

Jiraiya huffed, "Alright, alright. Open at five, close half an hour after twelve."

"You close at lunch?" Minato asked incredulously, he knew his uncle was lazy but this…

The man adopted a wicked grin, "I close at midnight, brat." Jiraiya waited as he felt horror rising at the thought of being stuck in a sex shop for basically the entire day before adding, "I open at five p.m."

He glared through his relief, "You did that on purpose."

His uncle grinned then changed the subject, "I'll be gone three weeks, maybe four if Sakumo can be kept from his brat that long."

.

 **And Because I can never leave out Kakashi**

.

"Go on." Obito goaded, "You lost, you know what you have to do."

Glaring ineffectually at his friend, Kakashi was never more grateful for his habitual scarf. "Hn. _Fine_."

Before the other could tease him anymore, he head inside- grabbing the first thing he came across that followed the rules _("It has to be something you can use! No chickening out by getting a book or some shit!")_ and heading to the counter swiftly, hoping to get out as soon as possible.

" _Kakashi-kun!?_ "

He froze. "M-minato-sensei?"

It was official, the universe hated him.


	10. Ideas

**Ideas**

 **.**

* * *

.

Guardian: 

The odds that a kitsune would loose their hoshi no tama were small given how protective they were of such things, that another would find it and keep it without knowing what it was- that was even smaller. Kurama had the misfortune of something one of a kind happening- he lost his hoshi no tama, it was found and kept by a human whom didn't know what it was and it was absorbed into the human. Now he has to act as protector to the human so that he won't die do to the stupid worm's actions.

OR

The Kyuubi Attack turns out differently when Kurama winds up Kakashi's unwilling protector.

.

Slender Man: 

What if Kakashi saw Slender Man during his chūnin exam and wrote it off? Then is followed but not noticing- since paranoia _is_ part of being a ninja- until Sakumo's death as he either sees it when he finds the body or at the funeral? Then snippets of him being stalked, steadily chipping at his sanity, until it cumulates to the Kyuubi attack when in he just gives in…

.

Paralyzed: 

While attempting to create Chidori, something goes wrong that causes the lightning to paralyze Kakashi. Minato ends up checking on him and, finding him unable to move [looking very much as if he were dead], takes him to the hospital. The medics attempt to use chakra to cure him but his chakra fights against it and thus creating a "stalemate" between them that _worsens_ his condition and makes it appear as if he has no chakra thus declaring him dead.

Kakashi is then dissected, with Minato's hesitant approval, since he's an organ donor- he is awake and aware the entire time, dying only when his heart is removed as the medics take _very_ good care of his body to keep his organs in the best shape.

Sad thing is, if a Hyūga or Uchiha or even an Aburame had visited, they would have noticed that he was alive- he would have come out of it on his own eventually also- but the only ones whom would have visited [here Hiashi, Shibi and Fugaku are Sakumo's genin team] were out on a mission at the time.

.

Serial Killer AU: 

Rin would do "mercy killings" or "euthanasia" for old people, terminally ill people, people in comas, etc., Obito would be trying to kill "bad guys" but at times relapse into simply killing out of revenge while pushing his wrongs onto a target, Minato will go for other killers but also rapists.

Kakashi will, mainly because he wants a challenge, go after organizations- gangs, illegal brothels, black markets, human trafficking, etc.- which would lead into the Danzo thing as Danzo will be running ROOT but they're basically assassins for hire whom generally target the world leaders in such a way to ignite wars so they'd get more business taking care of the enemy leaders (never mind that the enemy changes with which employer has the most money).

I see it as them having "territories" (loosely) with them overlapping a bit but in a way that Minato and Kakashi never met face-to-face but have heard about each other through Rin and Obito- I think the first time they really meet would be when Kakashi goes after Danzo and gets in trouble.

I also see them having "day jobs" (kinda like twisted superhero secret identities); Minato would be a teacher (either High School or College), Rin will be a nurse, Obito I think would be in civil services (maybe a fireman or policeman?) and Kakashi would be…Hm…a college student/waiter?

.

Kamui Caused Crossover: 

_["Jarvis, what the hell is this frequency?"]_

Kakashi blinked at the voice coming from his communicator, having never heard an accent quiet like that before, but another voice (Jarvis?) answered- with a different yet similarly unknown accent- the first.

 _{"I have cross-referenced all frequencies known to Earth but have been unable to find a match, Sir."}_

It was, Kakashi decided as the men's voices started off on the possibility of it being a satellite frequency they had tapped into, time to make the two aware of him, "Yo."

OR

Kakashi decided to work his way up to larger things when training Kamui, the communicator he practiced gets reception from someone in an entirely different dimension- Tony Stark to be exact.

.

Because I watched Pursuit of Happiness: 

There's a little boy that always sits and 'barters' a story out of him in exchange for some of the kid's lunch every day that the elementary school down the street is open. He does not expect to save the boy from kidnappers- he certainly does not expect the father, grateful and kind, to offer him the spare bedroom upon finding out he's homeless.

But, then, when has anything ever gone how Kakashi expected it?

.

Newspapers: 

ANBU were nameless, faceless and emotionless things that would kill you at the drop of a coin. People feared them, were _terrified_ of them- to the point where it harmed their duties. So, it was decided that there had to be a way for ANBU to seem more 'human' without giving their identities away. He didn't know who picked a newspaper- "A Newspaper By Unnamed Shinobi", ANBUs- but Kakashi believed they deserved a slow death.

[Or in which all ANBU are to write a piece for a newspaper that will be available to all villagers, Kakashi has no idea what to write and daydreams of revenge for the person who thought of the idea.]


	11. Snippets

**Snippets**

 **.**

* * *

.

Pokémon - Genma Finds Out 

"…You named a Treecko after me!?" Genma burst angrily. "What the hell Taichō?"

Kakashi glanced at him, "He's a Grovyle now." The man only glared so he added, "I am sorry…" He continued when the glare started to let up, "I couldn't find him a Raidō."

He probably deserved the punch he got for that.

.

Genderbent 

Kakashi woke up and simply stared at the ceiling.

Thirty seconds later the feeling that had woken him up hadn't disappeared so he resigned himself to looking down- finding that he was now a she.

At least, she supposed, she had magnificent breasts.

.

Root Exposed 

"We can't just kill them." Kakashi burst, not knowing why he did- he wasn't an idealist- but knowing he couldn't back down now.

The Council, whom had ignored him in favor of debating what to do about ROOT members, glanced at him, "Oh? And why is that Hatake-kun?"

"Because," He said, trying to channel his inner-Obito, inner-Minato, hell, even his inner-Naruto. "Whatever training they had, they are still Konoha shinobi. And Konoha takes care of it's shinobi."

.

His Father's Brother 

"Breath Niisan, breath." Kama told the panicking man calmly, hiding his amusement. Sakumo sucked in a breath obediently and let it out with a 'whuff' before looking at him expectantly, "Congratulations on your impending fatherhood."

The man grinned before it faltered, "What if I am not a good father? What if the baby hates me? What if I do something stupid and the baby get's hurt? What if I accidentally kill my child!?"

"Niisan, I just-…breath Niisan, breath."

.

Inside Jokes 

"Sensei!" Naruto shouted, stopping before him. "Why do the mask people-"

"ANBU!" Sakura corrected sharply, looking as if she would have hit the boy if her hands weren't full.

The blond bobbed his head, "ANBU- I knew that! Why do the ANBU call you Kāchan?"

"Does it matter?" He asked, not really wanting to explain the intricacy of running gags and it's appeal to the Black Ops.

"Well, uh, no, not really." Naruto said before continuing. "But why don't you have any kids, Sensei?"

Not even looking up from his book, Kakashi deadpanned, "Carrying Tenzo decayed my uterus and destroyed my womb. Alas, I can no longer get pregnant."

 _"Excuse me!?"_

He froze at the sound of Tōsan and Sensei's shocked shouts.


	12. Summer Wars

**Summer Wars**

 **.**

* * *

.

There were three things Kakashi had guessed might happen once he died; he would be dragged for an eternity of torment in penance for his sins, he would fall into nothingness by simply ceasing to exist or, if he were lucky, he would see his loved ones again.

None of them happened.

Well, to be more accurate, there was a brief time of nothingness where he had no body but remained aware before he felt a tug and was pulled _somewhere_. Which lead to now, his- apparent- reincarnation being dictated by a female voice.

 **||Welcome to the land of OZ.**

 **OZ is a virtual world where people from across the globe can come together online and enjoy themselves. Reaching the land of OZ is a snap, your personal computer, television and even phone can take you there. Now it's time for you to experience OZ first hand.||**

Twisting as well as he could without a body, he found that- beyond a screen- he could see a bit of a boy who looked no older then ten with dark brown (almost black) hair that covered one eye (the one he could see was also a dark brown), had pale skin that was beginning to tan and wore a grey sleeveless shirt.

 **||First, take a moment to create your own, unique avatar. It's the digital body in which you explore OZ. It's totally customizable, from clothing to hair-style the sky's the limit.||**

Here he found himself immobile and, though no longer bodiless even if he only had a very undetailed body, oddly _flat_. He was also facing the boy, surrounded by white though he could vaguely see things of various sizes, shapes and colors from the corners of his eyes. The boy's arm was moving, though the hand was beyond his limited view, then paused before a _click_ sounded.

There was a _shift_ and then, suddenly, he was bigger, taller and _furrier_. Checking as much as he could, Kakashi found that he now had fingers- long, human-like and fur covered- and toes- shorter and rounded in a way that made him think of his ninken's, wider in a way that made him think that he'd either use them to run one or they would be prominent in helping him push off things and turn- along with a _tail_ that twitched as soon as he recognized the odd weight of it. He felt weight on his head that he took as him having animal-like ears, large ones, but he wasn't able to move them so he couldn't check to see what kind they were- he could, however, see that he had a furry animal maw with a pink nose that made him realize with a kind of muted horror that he was a _rabbit_ , albeit a tall, anthropomorphic one.

 _At least_ , Kakashi mused, _his fur was white, even if he was naked._


	13. The Pilot

**The Pilot**

 **.**

* * *

.

" _'Konoha Strikes Again!'_ " Shiranui Genma announced grandly to the food hall, and Kakashi looked up to see the man standing on top of a table to ensure he had the entire room's attention before he continued reading from the newspaper he held. " _'Yesterday night Tokuda Daiki of Tokuda Motels was found in a jail cell, bound and gagged with a folder taped to his chest with the Konoha Leaf Symbol drawn on it. While we don't have the exact details of what was in the folder, there have been rumors that Tokuda-san had threatened an entire neighborhood to either give up their homes and keep their silence in order for him to tear down the houses to build a new motel in it's place.'_ Then it just goes on about how no one will comment."

"Then get the fuck down and let us eat in peace!" Mitarashi Anko roared, tossing her empty dango stick at the man.

Orochimaru of the Sanin glanced at his charge, "Ignore him. Paying attention to idiots only encourages them."

From beside Hatake Sakumo, Kakashi's father, Jiraiya, another Sanin and Orochimaru's teammate, sent an exaggeratedly wounded look, "Are you calling me an idiot, Oro-kun? I thought we had something special!"

The Snake Sanin sent Anko a 'See?' look but it was Tsunade, the final Sanin, whom answered Jiraiya from her spot beside her apprentice, "The only thing special about you is your brain, you pervert! It's a wonder that you haven't gotten yourself killed yet! Kami knows why the Hatake deal with you!"

"Sandaime-sama offers money to keep Jiraiya out of his hair and out of trouble." Kakashi answered easily when the room's attention split between him and his father.

Jiraiya glared, "What? He does not! Sakumo- tell your brat he's wrong! Sensei does _not_ pay you! I, Jiraiya the Toad Sage, am amazing and it's an honor for you that I spend time with you! Sakumo! _Sakumo are you ignoring me!?_ "

Sakumo ignored the man, calmly taking a drink of his tea.

* * *

 **In this AU, I see Konoha as a mix of vigilante and thief guild/crime court- they are territorial and protective of their home though which means that they are generally seen as heroes in their town even if they are not as happily viewed (mainly due to them taking the 'grey' jobs in other towns).**

 **Why it's called "The Pilot"…. I watched a lot of T.V. when the idea was born.**


	14. Obito's Fault

**Obito's Fault**

 **.**

* * *

.

 _This,_ Kakashi thought as he laid flat on the wagon floor, the jerky movement making itchy straw poke at his skin and his friend's sleepy snuffling keeping him awake, _is all Obito's fault_.

For some, running into an old school companion that you've not spoken to in a while as you're in the process of getting an easy dinner at a konbini is an unexpected yet pleasant surprise. For these people, it's a chance to pass time in line as you chat about what you've been up to since you last saw each other and pass along what information you have with other schoolmates that you've kept in touch with. It is the opportunity to exchange contact information and promises to remain in touch and easy _'I can't believe it's really been so long'_ s as you both depart and continue on with your lives.

Kakashi is not one of these people.

Or, more accurately, Uchiha _Damn-You_ Obito did not let him be one of these people.

* * *

 **For Kakashi, Obito's middle name is "Damn-You".**


	15. Time Travel - Anbu

**Time Travel - Anbu**

 **.**

* * *

.

Kakashi's very first thought upon waking with a horrid headache was, _'Dammit Genma!'_ which followed closely by a _'Never drinking again'_ as he groaned aloud his misery derived for allowing himself to be talked into getting drunk in celebration for their team's youngest's- Uchiha Itachi- birthday.

Not that anyone cared for getting the _actual_ birthday boy drunk, of course.

"Kakashi!" He very carefully did not react to the voice even if mentally he flew into a panic-induced rage because that was his _father_ and _who would dare-!?_ "Are you sick? It's not like you to sleep in."

He voiced his misery again, letting the groan insinuate what it will as he mumbled, peering at the other with bleary eyes. "M'fine Tosan…M'up." He added as he struggled- partially faked but also partially real as he was entirely unused to his shrunken form- to get up.

"I think it's best if you stay in bed today," Tosan _(the imposter? the hallucination?)_ stopped him with a large, warm, calloused hand that gently pressed down- and he ached for this to be real in that moment. "I'll tell Minato-kun that you're unavailable today, I doubt he will mind as you don't have a mission."

Kakashi closed his eyes at the thought of his sensei, something that was taken for as pain as the man added hesitantly. "I have to go to a meeting, will you be alright until I get back? It should be no later than three."

"Be 'right, Tosan." he slurred. "M'not movin', gonna sleep…"

Softer now, as he 'drifted off' to sleep, "Alright Kakashi. I'll see you when I get back."

He waited in bed, breathing deeply in a mimicry of sleep and chakra remaining sedat save for the barest of flickers to indicate nonsensical dreams, as he track the other's chakra until it left- waiting a couple of beats to make certain it was gone before actively searching to see if there was anyone near him. Once he was certain he was alone, Kakashi disrupted his chakra then intentionally inflicted pain on himself- nothing changed.

Not a genjutsu then.

Wandering the house, taking in the details- the accurate details- he, with a sinking feeling, was coming to the conclusion that he had somehow managed to travel into the past (He was six, Kakashi discovered, and it was the a week before the his Chunin Exam tournament took place).

Again he cursed Genma.


	16. Kakashi Gives a Gift

**Kakashi Gives a Gift**

 **.**

* * *

.

The Yondaime smiled at him, "No, I just wanted to know if anything interesting happened on your mission."

"It-…" Kakashi cut of the _It's all in the report_ when he recalled his gift and, guessing that the man was hinting at if he had gotten a gift in return for the tantō, dug through his pockets until he produced a dark blue box that he gave to the other, "I got you something."

The blonde's eyes widened but he accepted the box with a pleasantly surprised smile, "Thank you, Kakashi."

He struggled not to shift uneasily as the man stilled upon opening the box; inside, he knew, was a necklace that had four pendants, each of which had been specialized to represent each member of their once team. Rin's was the same shade of purple as her markings and in the shape of Konoha's medical-nin symbol, Obito's a miniaturized version of the goggles the boy wore, Minato's a ' _Flash'_ written out with golden yellow metal while his own was a ' _Henohenomoheji'_ written out in silver- the necklace itself was made of the same material as wire strings (though encased in leather to make it more comfortable) thus more likely to endure being worn by an active shinobi then a regular necklace.

"I-…" Minato faltered into silence, smile wilting into nothing.

Kakashi winced, evidently his present was not only inadequate compared to the tantō but also _insulting_ , and snatched the box back, "I…I'll return it immediately…"

"Wha-" The blond started, eyes wide (in horror?) before crying, "NO!"

He stepped back a bit, glaring at the thought of the man accepting a gift he clearly didn't like simply to spare _his_ feelings, "I will return it."

"W-why?" Minato asked (desperately?).

He faltered slightly, "Because you don't like it…?"

" _Nonononono-!_ " The Yondaime said in a rush, snatching the gift back and holding it protectively. "I _like_ it, I _do!_ "

Kakashi blinked and questioned haltingly, "Then…why-…"

"I was shocked-" The man rushed out, "-but it's a good gift, Kakashi. Thank you."

A knot that he hadn't even been aware of eased at the affirmation that his gift was acceptable, "You're welcome."


	17. Child Shinobi (As Seen By a Father)

**Child Shinobi (As Seen By a Father)**

 **.**

* * *

.

Some days Sakumo could believe that Minato Namikaze was a gift sent from the gods- when, upon becoming a Jōnin, the teen promptly demanded to be Kakashi's teacher, Sakumo was sure it was one of those days.

His pup, previous to the teen's demand, had been passed around frequently- people wanting the chance to teach a legend's son, a genius but none truly taking into account that that genius was still a child. Many found themselves balking at teaching a child of such a young age to kill, those whom didn't grew to fear his whelp when they saw how swiftly he took to such lessons.

There were whispers, mostly from the civilians, of Kakashi being a demon due to how easily the boy took to being a shinobi. Parents in particular were unnerved, fearfully ushering their children away on the few times Sakumo had managed to convince his pup to play with others his (approximate) age- hissing hurried warnings to their young to _'stay away from that little monster, who knows when he'll snap and turn on us'._

It was probably the most heartbreaking moment of his life when Kakashi asked Sakumo if the boy really was a monster.


	18. Time Travel - Not a Hatake

**Time Travel - Not a Hatake**

 **.**

* * *

.

Sakumo couldn't say that he had known Hake Kama for a long time in comparison to Jiraiya, whom he's known since he was four, but he felt as if he could claim the man as a friend- a good one at that.

The twenty-three year old had shown up during the climax of the Second Shinobi War, seeking refuge for himself and the displaced civilians he had decided to escort (as a shinobi who's village had been destroyed during the fighting) to the safety of Konohagakure. To the dismay of the civilians the then seventeen year old had been protecting, Kama had been dragged in for questioning; Sakumo didn't know exactly what happened only that it involved the Hokage, Yamanaka Clan Head and Uchiha Clan Head (as the teen possessed a Sharingan)- the end result though was the three stating Kama could be trusted and that everything had been explained to their satisfaction.

To appease the Council, the teen had allowed Jiraiya to place a seal on him that would kill him should he betray Konoha.

It wasn't until his wife had been three months pregnant that Sakumo had met Kama, the Nidaime assigning him as the teen's partner in a way to a Jōnin-sensei as another appeasement to the council when Kama decided to continue his life as a shinobi. It was something he had not known how to feel about as the last of his genin cell had died recently and he viewed Kama as trying to take their place.

Those first few months were hectic as they both tried to feel the other out, learning about one another as they attempted to mesh together as teammate.

At first, the entire thing was exceedingly frustrating as Kama had been withdrawn and refused to so much as look at Sakumo let alone speak to him- something that, as he knew the teen interacted cheerfully with others, made him contemplate going to the Nidaime for a replacement so to be placed somewhere he was of use with a war going on. Then, as if he knew of these thoughts, Kama seemed to gather himself and look him straight in the eye for the first time and cheerfully tell Sakumo that his _'chakra control sucks, you tend to bleed when you use jutsu in a way that acts as a warning'_.

From there it was a matter of getting their fighting styles to flow together; Sakumo's being more flamboyant and intimidation-based while Kama's was more subtle, analytical and based on being underestimated. They settled on a simple yet deadly tactic of Sakumo being the distraction whilst Kama went for the kill- something that earned the teen the nickname the _'White Fang's Blood-Soaked Shadow'._

* * *

 **And Yes, Kakashi is irritated that he doesn't get his _own_ nickname.**


	19. The Book - Comfort: Teammates

**The Book - Comfort: Teammates**

 **.**

* * *

.

The first part of comforting someone takes place before the actual action and it is to gather Intel on what is bothering your target, information such as;

What is bothering them?

What possible reasons may it be bothering them?

To what extent does it bother them?

Being able to deduce what and why and how much something is bothering your target is helpful in preventing you from making the situation worse- like a mission, you cannot proceed without the proper intelligence without risk to your objective.

Once you have gathered the proper Intel, you must determine if your comfort will be passive or active. To determine which course you should take, answer the following question;

Is there anything you can do- whether it be physically or verbally doing something- to effect what is bothering your target?

If NO, then your comfort will be more passive in that you cannot directly alter the situation which causes your target's distress. Passive comfort can be compared to Standby wherein your target is to be aware of your presence and that you will come forwards to assist if signaled to do such.

 _•NOTE: Depending on the personality of the target, you may step forwards into the position of Touchstone along with the responsibilities of such. Know that your relationship with the target shall decide if you are a Platonic, Platonic-Intimate, Sexual or Sexual-Intimate Touchstone._

If YES, then your comfort will be active. Now answer this;

Is the action you're taking to effect what is bothering your target verbal or physical?

If VERBAL, then you need to judge how whatever information you say would effect your target. It is not like a mission where all information- good or bad- is required to be told clearly, concisely and immediately.

Information which is "good" can be told in a similar manner as there is no real reason why you shouldn't just bluntly inform your target of the "good news" in order to positively alter their emotional unbalance.

Information which is "bad" may be disregarded if it is not something of an immediate concern, "bad news" which is of an immediate concern must be handled with delicacy unlike "good news". This is due to the varying degrees in which you can negatively alter your target's emotional unbalance, the less delicate in which you handle the "bad news" the greater the emotional balance will slide to negative. If at all possible, have those that your target considers friends present and have the location somewhere private yet where your target feels at ease, be sure that your target is aware of your presence- as you would with [Passive Comfort]- before and after you inform them of the "bad news".

If PHYSICAL, than you need to judge how whatever evidence how have will affect your target. Unlike [Active, Verbal Comfort], no evidence should be hidden although similar to aforementioned, it will be presented with more delicacy than one would use with a mission.

Evidence which is "good" can be similarly presented as the "good news" of [Active, Verbal Comfort] though some semblance of privacy may be warranted due to the target's preference.

Evidence which is "bad" is something best presented in privacy with conditions similar to the "bad news" of [Active, Verbal Comfort] though it is something in which you should present at the soonest possible moment.

* * *

 **I remember some mentioning wanting more when Sai looked up how to comfort someone. This is for you. (And because it dug into the back of my brain until I wrote it)**


	20. AYH - Incomplete Version

**AYH - Incomplete Version**

 **.**

* * *

.

 **2) -** Kakashi's two years old and he's on Tousan's shoulders waving the last guest goodbye until they're out of sight when Tousan asks, "Are you happy?".

 **4) -** Kakashi's four years old and Tousan asks on the way home "Did you have a good day?" but he hears _'Are you happy?'_ instead.

 **6) -** Kakashi's six years old and he's lying exhausted in a hospital bed, Tousan's looking at him with eyes not yet happy and not quite sad as he asks, "Are you happy?"

 **8) -** Kakashi's eight years old and when Sensei finds him to ask "Are you alright?" he hears the echo of Tousan ask 'Are you happy?' and he's not quite sure how to answer for the first time.

 **10) -** Kakashi's ten years old with Sensei's hand curled over his shoulder as the blond asks "Are you alright?" and yet he still hears Tousan asking _'Are you happy?'_ even though it's been over two years.

 **12) -** Kakashi's twelve years old, hair being ruffled by his new Senpai as the man asks "Are you proud?" and he has to hold in a sob when he hears the echo of Tousan asking, _'Are you happy?'_ and he wonders if he'll ever be able to answer _'yes'_ to that question again.

 **14) -** Kakashi's fourteen years old, cradling all that's left of his Sensei to him even as the baby wails throughout the service and wonders if the little orphan will ever be happy because he feels like the answer to Tousan's ghost's question of _'Are you happy?'_ will always be _'no'_.

 **16) -** Kakashi's sixteen years old and his Senpai dead by three months, leaving him to run missions on his own and without the strength to even look at Sensei's son, and when the ghost of his father asks _'Are you happy?'_ he wants to laugh- bitter and harsh, loud enough to be a scream of it's own.

 **18) -** Kakashi's eighteen years old and he's going over a compound full of corpses with a Hyūga, Sharingan searing each corpse into his memory as he searches them for traps and when he hears the phantom question of _'Are you happy?'_ he wants to scream because he had been so close to having the answer be _'yes'_ once more.

 **20) -** Kakashi's twenty years old, standing before his squad as he tells them that they're disbanding, sees the accusing glares and the question _'Are you happy?'_ comes as a taunt that he's confidently able to answer _'no'_ to.

 **22) -** Kakashi's twenty-two years old and his kohai is before him, hesitant and he tells his long term partner that he's proud as the question _'Are you happy?'_ and the answer _'no'_ bounce around his head.

 **24) -** Kakashi's twenty-four years old, standing alone in an empty apartment with his new jonin uniform on and he recoils when he catches sight of the mirror and sees Tousan screaming _'Are you happy? Such a good little shinobi, are you happy yet!?'_.

 **26) -** Kakashi's twenty-six years old and he's sitting watch, a little kunoichi curled into his side for warmth, a young Uchiha absently playing with the campfire across from him and Sensei's son sprawled on the ground near him muttering about ramen in sleep- _'Are you happy?'_ is murmured to him and he thinks that finally, finally the answer is _'yes'_.

* * *

 **You see when Kakashi starts to quietly go insane?**


	21. Kakashi Doesn't Do Sleepovers

**In Which Kakashi Does NOT Do Sleepovers _(Or Understand The Meaning of Disproportionate Retribution)_**

 **.**

* * *

.

"What." The word was flat, and his glare unimpressed, but Hatake Kakashi felt he was entirely justified in his irritation- it's not every day one is forcibly evicted.

His, former apparently, landlord paled but stood firm in a way that made him believe she was either a former kunoichi or married to a shinobi. "I know that Jōnin lead hectic lives, Hatake-san, but this was the third time that you missed four consecutive rent payments. It is unacceptable. I am sorry but you have been evicted, I had your things put in the Firefly Storage House."

"I…see." He managed, took a deep breath and placed his key on her desk. "I apologize for the inconvenience."

With that, he left the room swiftly to go to the roof- not particularly caring about the cloud of smoke he had left behind. Kakashi glanced up and groaned at the star-lit sky, he wouldn't be able to retrieve his things until tomorrow. He hesitated a moment before heading back to the ANBU barracks, at least he'd have a free place to sleep- even if he had to share a room with however many others.

"Senpai?" Tenzo called as soon as he arrived at the barracks, "What are you doing here?"

"Having a sleepover." Kakashi deadpanned, laying down to claim a bed.

Genma, from two beds over, grinned, "Ne, shall we giggle over your crush first, _Kakashi-chan_?"

No matter what anyone says about 'disproportionate retribution', Genma deserved it- it's not like Kakashi electrocuted him _that_ much.


	22. Henohenomoheji-san - Favorite Weapon

**Dear Henohenomoheji-san**

 **.**

* * *

.

 **What is your favorite weapon and why? - Yuki, student.**

.

Interesting question, Yuki-chan. The answer would depend on the view of whether summons and jutsu are to be considered "weapons" but if I were to answer under the assumption that summons and jutsu are not to be considered "weapons" than my answer would be this:

My personal favorite weapon is the Kunai.

Kunai might not be as interesting as interesting as the Kusarigama or as cool as the Katana but it is a practical weapon with an easy enough upkeep. They are, at ten for 50 ryo, one of cheapest weapons for a shinobi, something to keep in mind when one juggles mission pay for things like rent, tax, food, hygiene, recreation alongside your ninja equipment- things like kusarigama and katana are expensive to both get (kusarigama are rather rare in Konoha and any _decent_ katana costs an arm while a _good_ katana may be a small fortune to have made) and take care of, not to mention if you need to replace them.

Kunai are very versatile weapons.

Exploding Tags can be secured to them, one of the most common usage of the tags, so you have a more mobile, easily thrown explosive. Chakra can be used to reinforce them so they can meet in a clash with other weapons and to strengthen a throw to the point one can shatter stone, or you can use elemental chakra to coat your weapon- maybe not as cool as a flaming katana but a lightning kunai can do serious damage. Ninja Wire can be tied to them to allow you to manipulate them after you've thrown them (a bit like Rope Darts without being specially ordered), this is something my cute little kohai specializes in.

Now, Yuki-chan, if my answer comes as a disappointment, I want you to remember this- the Yondaime Hokage used kunai, not katana, for his Hiraishin no Jutsu.

.

 _ **-** **Henohenomoheji-san**_

* * *

 **So, anyone remember that Idea about ANBU making a newspaper (or at least they called it a newspaper)? This was born from that when I re-read that post- though this is more of Kakashi has an advice column (kinda? never actually read one) under the name "Henohenomoheji-san". "Yuki, student" isn't anyone really (though I suppose there could be a canon student named Yuki, but the name isn't important or really 'real') just more of a…mm…place holder for me to know what kind of questions to have- someone like "Kuro, Chūnin" would ask different things. The question was a mix of odd dinner conversation (which can range from zombie clowns to what stuffed animal would you rather be) between siblings about favorite character's signature weapons and my thought process of _'Kakashi used a tanto and katana but more often he uses a kunai…signature weapon or favorite one?…what reason would that be, hmmm…'_. **

**That said, there will be more of these as I think of them and I have absolutely no problem if anyone wants to send their own question in.**


	23. An Accident

**An Accident**

 **(Or In Which Kakashi Crosses Certain Moral Boundaries)**

 **.**

* * *

.

"It was an accident." Sensei told him when the man arrived, finding him standing in an empty hospital with blood that wasn't his own splatted on him.

"It's not your fault." Gai, in a rare moment of solemnity, told him in a voice that said _this is the truth because there is no way it could be anything else_ when the Taijutsu specialist found out while he and Sensei waited for the a medic to exit the operating room and tell them what was happening to their last teammate.

Kushina said, while she bullied him back to her apartment to get himself cleaned up and force him to eat, "Don't blame yourself, you're not to blame- you can't blame yourself for a training accident."

When she woke up and found out that she wouldn't be allowed on active duty, Rin cried but still managed to tell him, "It's alright, I know you didn't mean to- and I can still work in the hospital."

It was an accident, it's not your fault, you're not to blame and you didn't mean to they told him, they believed, they _knew_.

They were wrong because _he had meant it._

It _wasn't_ an accident.

Kakashi had deliberately ended Rin's career as a field medic and he didn't regret it- he'd promised to keep her safe after all.

And now she would be.


	24. Crossover - Hogwarts, Reborn OCs

**Crossover - Hogwarts, Reborn OCs**

 **(Or the Harry Potter crossover I wrote and then forgot about)**

 **.**

* * *

.

"Thoughts..?" Táirgí Hasek murmured to his twin.

"I think I'll like it here." Ròcais answered simply, eying the road turning to dirt as the town faded to country. Táirgí hummed in agreement.

 _Reincarnation,_ the now seven year old mused, _was odd._

Hatake Kakashi died at a respectable age off forty-six; he had fought in two wars, held the record for longest serving in ANBU, wrangled a team of misfits that grew into legends, served as Hokage until handing the hat to his student and managed to see the first inter-village genin team into chūnin. It was, for a shinobi, a long and fulfilling life- when he died, he expected to reunite with his loved ones and wait for those he left behind to eventually follow him.

He did not expect to go from Dead to Being Born Again. Nor did he expect to find himself in a new world with a twin of all things. He definitely did not expect to, at age five as Ròcais Hasek, find out his twin was his reincarnated father, Hatake Sakumo.

Being seven, red-haired and blue-eyed Irish-German was a change from a plus forty, silver-haired black-eyed retired Konoha shinobi _…but_ , he acknowledged, _not necessarily a bad one._

He had a mother now, he was able to spend much more time with Sakumo then he had before, he got an actual childhood (for all that the two of them still trained) and everything in this new world was so… _interesting._

"My cousin seemed to let it go a bit," Páirc Hasek, their mother, pulled him out of his thoughts as she ushered them out of the cab as it stopped. "But I think we can manage, eh?"

The building was two stories and large enough to have housed a lord, with layered roofing made of dark grey shingles and cracking pale-yellow walls that displayed no less than five large windows with a proud wooden door. There was a short stretch of a stone pathway leading from the dirt road that curved around the side of the house to the front door, untamed grass and wildflowers lining it. Through the, admittedly dirty, window on the left he could see what seemed like a small library, the back of a faded red couch peeking through the bottom of the window with a lantern to the right, resting on a dark wood side table. The widow on the right was cleaner, displaying a blackwood dinner table and four chairs with red cushions, red placeholders sat in front of each chair with a circular mat at the center, a black-silver vase sitting empty there with a chandelier drooping above. The far right window was mostly covered by a black curtain but he could just make out a bunch of brooms neatly stacked.

"Okay!" Páirc clapped her hands, "You two can go explore- stay by the house and together- while I go back to meet the truck…I have no idea why no one else but family can ever seem to find this place…" She muttered, getting back into the cab.

Kakashi glanced at his father when the cab disappeared, "Seals?"

"No…there isn't any chakra for Seals," Sakumo sounded thoughtful. "Maybe that Other can be used for something similar?"

 _Other._ That was the name they had given the strange energy they felt because, while everyone seemed to have at least a small amount, it was definitely _not_ chakra. Chakra was more controlled, more intricate with pathways and specific points for use while the _Other_ was only uniformed by a single core; there were no pathways, no usage points- it was hectic, untamed and would have been a medic-nin's nightmare.

"Maybe." He allowed, offering as the other opened the door. "I'll take upstairs?"

* * *

 **I am pretty sure the names had meant something when I first wrote this but it's been a while and I can't remember now so…just interesting names I guess?**


	25. In Two Worlds

**In Two Worlds**

 **(Or the full [1st part] of _A Long Fall_ )**

 **.**

* * *

.

In another world Hatake Sakumo returns three days before the estimated time needed, a solemn Jōnin trailing and a wounded chūnin in his arms. In that world he would have rushed immediately to the hospital and would have later met the small yet thankful family of the chūnin he'd saved. In that world he would have trusted his Jōnin teammate to report as he waited for his kohai to receive news that she, while alive, would never be able to continue her kunoichi lifestyle and in that world a Jōnin with a seal on his tongue would stand before a grim yet hesitantly hopeful war council and firmly destroy that hope as he spoke of the team leader's choice to abandon the mission.

In that world Hatake Sakumo would return home late, guilty over the failure (in both the mission and protecting his kohai enough to save her career) but overall pleased that he'd managed to return everyone alive. In that world he would return to a dark, quiet house with a covered bowl of Tendon sitting in a crude seal array that had kept it warm enough him to eat immediately and he would grin because he _knew_ how his son hated anything fried so for the little chūnin to make something with Tempura would have been entirely for _his_ benefit and that, _that_ would be enough to ease any lingering guilt entirely. In that world he would eat dinner alone by candle light then quietly clean up after himself, he would take a moment on his way to his room to check on his son- he would see rumpled casual clothes that must have been put on after training and a thin wrap of bandages on the left forearm, he would hear deep breaths and soft snoring that Kakashi only allowed at home (he would also use a little chakra to let himself hear the soft yet steady **_thump-thump_** of his son's heart), he would smell the plain Inuzuka-made soap along with dried blood and know that his son was showered and that the bandage was nothing to be concerned about- before falling asleep in his uniform, smile quirking at his mouth with the knowledge that he would be scolded for it in the morning.

In that world a council would be fuming over a lost chance, a Hokage would understand the choice even as he too worried over the lost chance and a Jōnin with a seal on his tongue would be satisfied with a successful mission. In that world a man would be pleased with how his plans are moving along, a chūnin would be mourning as her family rejoiced, a father and son would share the hopes of stealing time spent together before being called away by clashing schedules.

In that world things were not perfect but that night, the vast majority would go to sleep content and happy.

But that, that was in a different world and in _this_ world Hatake Sakumo returns two days late and when he returns he is _alone_. In this world he is filthy, with dried mud and blood encrusting him from top to bottom, and he is injured, a bandage wraps the majority of his right arm and if an Inuzuka is asked they can say they smell burnt flesh a few days old. In this world the only thing he has of his teammates are their headbands that his wounded arm steadily drips blood on. In this world he crosses paths with his son on his way to the Hokage's office, here he sees his son's wide eyes and he turns away to continue on his way where in that other world he would have stopped to check on his sons had they crossed paths. In this world Hatake Kakashi recoils in something akin to fearful pain at the first time his father turns away from him and he hesitates enough that his father gets lost in the crowd, here Namikaze Minato curls a hand over his student's shoulder and quietly leads the chūnin away.

In this world Hatake Sakumo stands before the war council and informs them that the mission is a success, here he places the headbands on the table as adds that the village has lost two shinobi. In this world a man grits his teeth at his plan's failure while a council rejoices, here the Hokage takes the headbands and says that their fallen will be honored before dismissing the weary legend. In this world Hatake Sakumo walks back onto the street only to face a small family that sobs and screams accusations of _"How dare you let her die! You were suppose to protect her! It's your fault she died! You killed her!"_ until a group of Uchiha quietly herds them away, here the nearby shinobi tell him _"They're wrong. She was a kunoichi, she knew how this life is. And you completed the mission so it wasn't like her death was in vain. You're a hero-"_.

In this world Hatake Kakashi watches from a ramen shop as his father runs away from the title 'hero' and quietly wonders why when it is the truth- all that matters is that the mission is completed, right? In this world Namikaze Minato closes his eyes when his student voices his confusion, he says _"There are something more important then the mission."_ and he lets out a soft, bitter laugh when the child looks at him uncomprehendingly before quietly telling his student to finish his food before it gets cold.

In this world Hatake Sakumo returns home to a house brightened by the afternoon sunlight and the first thing he does is bathe, cleaning harshly as if it was a punishment and this earns him a few hairs torn out and a wound completely reopened- he hisses as soapy water stings his wound before dunking it, keeping it under until the water turns pink. In this world he dries and dresses before leaving the room, here he is faced with his son silently waiting at the table and he just _stares_ until finally the chūnin goes over to inspect the wound. In this world he stays silent and immobile as his son methodically stitches his wound with practiced hands and he _aches_ and when it is done he turns away from his son for the second time.

In this world he does not see the pain that crosses his son's face, does not smell the fearful confusion starting to settle itself into his son's scent, does not hear the a soft yet sharp intake of air as if from a blow (does not use chakra to hear the rapid **_thumpthumpthump_** as a young heart picks up speed) as he walks away.

In this world a council rejoices while the Hokage silently carves to more names into the memorial, here a man seethes but starts plotting anew and hatred festers in the hearts of a small family. In this world a father spends the night before a grave, shying away from the title 'hero' and embracing the name 'killer' with a guilty self-hatred. In this world a son curls up in a silent, abandoned house and wonders what it is he did wrong to cause his father to shy away from him twice. In this world a teacher sits on the stone head of his kage, thinks of his student's confusion of there being more then the mission and drinks as he curses his village for the first time.

Here in this world some will say that things are perfect this night but for the ones who don't, hatred festers alongside revulsion- _fear_ and the night is a long one for them.


	26. Crossover - Hogwarts, Little Dog Star

**Crossover - Hogwarts, Little Dog Star**

 **.**

* * *

.

Hatake Kakashi was reborn. He was entirely aware of his past life and, inconsequence, rather traumatized over the entire birthing process along with ashamed over having absolutely no control over his body. He was also not a regular child of a shinobi or civilian village but a wizard child born to a magic family in a world that he was certain was an entirely different one then his original.

Kakashi blamed Naruto, his life was - relatively- normal before the boy entered it.

Magic, Kakashi found, made people inexplicably lazy. It was something that, given how active a shinobi's life was and that was only slowed due to death or injury, unsettled him to an extent that bordered on horrified. It was also something he privately swore not to allow to happen to him, taking measures by way of starting stretches (for future flexibility) and katas (for a stable groundwork) as soon as he was capable of independent movement- progressing to running (for endurance) with makeshift weights (for speed and strength).

It confused his new…family, particularly the man whom sired him (not father, never father- Hatake Sakumo will always be his father, his Tōsan.), but they were willing to let such oddities slide so long as he upheld the family name.

His family were Blacks and, as they took great joy in reciting, purebloods of a Most Noble and Most Ancient House. Kakashi personally thought that they were rather like an unholy crossbreed of Hyūga and Uchiha (something that gave him nightmares imagining a child between Sasuke and Neji, as Hinata was obviously a one of a kind fluke) with an obsession with green, silver and all things snake-like. He also believed it was a shame that they couldn't see how much better dogs were but privately remained pleased that his new name, Sirius, was the Dog Star.


	27. But A Memory

**But A Memory**

 **.**

* * *

.

At five years old, Hatake Sakumo's day started when he woke in the morn alongside the rising sun and scrambled from under his covers to stand on his bed and peek at how the morning sun drew shadows across the land as it chased the night away. He saw the neighbors rousing themselves slowly, bedroom lights winking on steadily, and heard his father already moving about beneath him in the kitchen.

Then the first rooster woke, beyond the gated borough that Sakumo's house sat, and cried it's awakening to the world- others joining in even as a few of the younger dogs barked and howled at them in reply. And suddenly the neighbors were getting up quicker.

Sakumo scrambled off his bed to shuck off his pajamas and tug on his clothes before barreling from his room, down the stairs and into the bathroom- relieving himself, washing his hands, brushing his teeth and cleaning his face- before going into the kitchen to eat breakfast. Breakfast was a small affair that consisted of a poached egg sandwiched between two slices of toast along with a glass of milk and consumed in silence. Once finished, Father journeyed upstairs to get dressed and Sakumo made quick work of the dishes then went out back to feed the dogs.

Father's ninken, now retired old dogs with various injuries to show their worth, were merely three in number as opposed to the original ten; Suki the chinook with a front right leg that would never handle her weight enough to walk properly, Isamu the male dingo who was now blind with the left ear now in tatters and Mamoru the tamaskan who was missing an eye, ear, leg and the majority of his tail.

Toshiro, the Kuvasz pup given to him on his fourth birthday as is customary, rushed over to him with an excited yip, "A'umo!"

"Shiro-chan!" Sakumo greeted cheerfully, picking up the pup via a hug around the stomach and earning a tongue bathing on his face.

Suki gave an annoyed growl, "Play o'yer own time whelp, ya got work to do!"

"Yes, Suki-san. I apologize." he told the bitch whom laid down with an irritated huff. "Shiro-chan can you hold the door open for me?"

Toshiro bobbed in agreement, squirming from his arms to scramble toward the shed door while Sakumo gave the food trough- carved from the trunk of a fallen tree and low enough for pups to reach- a glance to make certain it was empty before jogging to the shed. Opening the door, absently noting that the screws needed tightening, Sakumo went in as Toshiro used his body as a door stopper- grabbing a bag of dog food that he had to use chakra just to hold and his feet just to make sure he didn't fall. The journey to the trough was a slow one, littered with Toshiro's encouragements of 'Go A'umo!', and he was relieved to lighten his burden when he tipped food into the trough.

The bag was taken from him and Sakumo beamed as Father carried it back into the shed, "Thanks, Father!"

"Don' ya know not to yell durin' breakfast, whelp?" Suki snapped.

Mamoru let out a bark, "Enough Suki! I recall you being much worse at that age, let the boy be."

"It is time to go, Koinu-chan." Isamu rumbled, scarfing down one last mouthful before stalking off.

Sakumo followed with Toshiro bounding behind him, absently wondering at how the dingo could maneuver so well without his sight but those thoughts were shoved away as they reached the gate. Father stood there along with various cousins of Sakumo's, Kōunki-ojisan holding Kōgu-chan on his shoulders- recalling that Kōgu-chan had turned four two weeks previously, the giant schnauzer pup Kiki was evidence, Sakumo knew that Kōgu-chan was finally allowed to accompany them past the borough gates to the farmland beyond. As was customary, each member (male or female) of the Hatake clan had a dog with them- each at various ages and in varying states- this dog being the one that they had gotten at age four.

Toshiro stood straight, chest puffing up in pride when Kiki let out an awed whuff when Father opened the gates- Sakumo also felt a surge of pride when Kōgu-chan let loose his own awed sound.

"Kōunki and Mugiaki's groups will be the first and third quarters." Father announced as we walked through the gates. "Suika's will be the second quarter and mine will be the fourth."

Sakumo knew from experience that the farmland, affectionately dubbed Little Garden, where plants were grown were divided into quarters of 250 acres of land with the first and third being the closest to the borough gates while the second and fourth were farther- bordering the ranch's gates. The first quarter grew medical plants, the second saw to fruits, the third tended to grains- divided further into cereal and legume- with the fourth focusing on vegetables. Three canals (Sakura-sama told him that Hashirama-dono had molded the canals with his Mokuton while Kagami-dono organized his clansmen to use Doton and Suiton to redirect rivers through the canals so that they would remain full of water as per agreement of the Hatake Clan's settlement in Konohagakure) cut into the 'quarters', two cutting the quarters in half while the third separated the even and odd quarters- multiple wooden bridges (Sakura-sama said that Hashirama-dono kindly added them even though they were not part of the agreement) running over the canals.

He also knew that the fourth quarter were to tend to the animals in the ranch area, bring them out to feed, then at the four hour mark they would switch off with the second quarter and tend to their quarter as the second cared for the animals. Four hours after that, second quarter would switch with third and third with first the next four while the rest were free to go- provided that third quarter decided to work from the start as sometimes third quarter decided to get extra sleep and work later.

It was a long, tedious job that generally went thankless when there were shinobi clans like the Uchiha and Hyūga within the village with them being looked down upon by other clans- as the Hatake Clan almost exclusively used their chakra to either grow things or protect themselves. A fact that they had gotten away with despite the war thanks to Sakura-sama.

The Hatake Clan once had a population of nearing six hundred, well off despite the chaos of the warring states due to a combination of protection from the Daimyō (whom they provided for) and their firm neutrality in squabbles as they sold provisions to anyone whom could pay or work for it (a great many of their number whom married into the family- or were adopted in- had come to them in the hopes of working for food). Then the Uchiha and Senju created Konohagakure with Sunagakure, Iwagakure, Kumogakure, Kirigakure and dozens of smaller shinobi villages popping into existence- which was fine as the Hatake Clan secured contracts to ship food to many of them and their numbers swelled to nearly nine hundred.

Then the squabbling started up once more, only concentrated and organized enough to be called the First Shinobi World War. With war came a perverted possessiveness where each village saw it as a betrayal that the Hatake indiscriminately provided for them and their enemy thus, like children whom wish not to share a toy, they attacked the clan to prevent them from helping the enemy- raid after raid, killing any they came across and burning the lands they found.

And so eight hundred ninety-four dwindled down to one hundred seventeen.

Sakura-sama, having lost her husband and daughter along with countless friends and family members, gathered the remaining Hatake together, salvage all that they could and leaving their land in a large caravan where their number dropped to seventy-six before they stumbled across Tobirama-dono and his team heading back from the front lines. Sakura-sama promptly demanded, despite being little more powerful then a genin at the time and partially starved from giving the majority of her food to her growing sons, that Tobirama-dono escort their caravan to Konohagakure and take her to the Hokage for settlement negotiations.

(Kōunki-ojisan always stated that Tobirama-dono only obeyed out of pity when he saw the state of the children as Sakura-sama, despite having wolfhounds that were more then half her size flanking her, wasn't an intimidating figure at the time seeing as she was emaciated, filthy and cradling a child when this occurred.)

Hashirama-dono granted her an audience, providing provisions for the caravan despite the village already rationing supplies due to the war, where Sakura-sama stated that the Hatake could provide food for the village if they were allowed to settle a plot of land to their choosing and that no member of the clan were to be drafted into the war before the clan has settled and recovered from their journey.

And Hashirama-dono agreed, personally seeing to their settlement along with the Uchiha Clan Head, Kagami-dono.

"Sakumo." Father said, calling his attention to where the man stood with the ranch gate open. "Come."

The ranch gate was tall enough to keep the animals inside though low enough for ninken to jump over should they have need to- the gate was also lined with flowerbeds on the side where the quarters stood as the ranch's side housed beehives, gated to keep the animals from them and two per acre to keep them from competing too much.

Sakumo recalled setting out small bowls of sugar syrup for a hive (his hive for the year as he learned) near mid-February, uncovering the hive when it was warm enough, partially isolating the queen so that she wouldn't lay eggs in the honey stores, destroying a queen cell in order to prevent overcrowding and checking them weekly as they made honey- Father, though, said that he would only be allowed to harvest honey in autumn and, should the bees survive winter, he would be able to help with the other hives next year.

At the moment, Sakumo follows Father to the barn while Senzai-san takes two to the rabbit hutches and Yūkaku-san leaves with three to the coop- roosters crying out in a disorderly symphony.

The barn isn't a tall one, around a one-story house's height with a loft tucked away like an attic, but it was a large one- big enough that a row of four houses would fit inside with room left over to walk about. It was wooden (Hashirama-dono built it according to Sakura-sama's specifications) and painted sporadically with bits of mossy-green, had three large doors which divided the areas of the 'types' of animals kept- though all had the same bedding of wood shavings that they got for free due to a trade agreement with the Senju for them to get free dairy products.

The first area housed dairy cows, goats and the yak that Mugiaki-san won off a man from Iwagakure, the second area was where the sheep and alpacas were with cattle and pigs in the third. The fourth had horses that, aside from being rented out to civilians, were kept as sentimental value as they were descendants of the horses that traveled with the caravan as plowing was done with the dogs instead.

He went to a cow first, accepting the bucket his father handed him and grabbing the small step stool he used as a seat before entering the cow's stall while his father held the gate open for him. The cow, named Shi-chan, ignored him as he set down his stool and bucket, only letting out a drawn-out 'moo' when he started milking.

* * *

 **Because I wanted a Hatake _Clan_ and Young!Sakumo (or Puppy!Sakumo)**


	28. Crossover - Hogwart, Scarecrow & Serpent

**Crossover - Hogwarts, Scarecrow Dog & Serpent Lion**

 **.**

* * *

.

At age eleven, Hatake Kakashi- Sirius Black with his rebirth-started his day before the sunrise, going through his stretches that promoted future flexibility until the sky beyond his window purpled and blushed varying shades of red and pink as the sun crept over the horizon. From there he swiftly dressed in- as Walburga Black (the woman who gave birth to him) referred to as 'riffraff' clothes- black trousers and a dark blue singlet along with worn shoes and a black scarf to replace his mask, meeting his similarly dressed brother (his otouto was so cute, mimicking him in covering his face~!) in the hallway.

Regulus Black was probably one of the only things he enjoyed about his new life; a little brother was foreign enough that he didn't feel as if the boy was taking someone else's spot (as was the deal with Orion Black, who would never be able to take either of his father-figures' places) but similar to his genin that he developed an immediate fondness of the whelp.

Alphard Black was another person Kakashi liked, the man often times whisking him (and Regulus once the boy was born) away on an adventure- something which mainly consisted in being lost in a foreign country, not knowing the language and having enough money to buy their ways home but spending it on souvenirs and testing local restaurants. That didn't mean the trips weren't fun, they were and something he looked forwards to each year, but they were also very beneficial for him- thanks to the trips he had been able to make contacts in Spain, France, Italy, Denmark, Poland, Ukraine and Russia (or befriended those whom would grow into useful contacts in a couple of years).

His absolute favorite trip was last year when the three of them went to Japan, it wasn't home but it had been the closest he had ever been to it- he also, due to there being no Icha Icha and him not even gone through puberty, manage to get a subscription to a magical manga magazine. It really wasn't all that different from normal manga magazines except that it was the muggle ones compiled into a single magazine and could be played out like a movie.

"Sirius?" the nine year old prompted once they reached the door.

Humming, he secured the weights that Orion had bought him after realizing that Kakashi wasn't going to stop before checking Regulus had his on properly and leading the way out the house at a run. "I'm expecting you to keep this up after I leave."

"I know." His brother answered in a tone that bordered on exasperated by the number of times he had said such.

It wasn't as if Kakashi didn't have reason to be worried, magic had made witches and wizards excessively lazy- something he attributed to the fact that magic, unlike chakra, didn't require a good physical condition to properly utilize.


	29. Through Demons - Three Moments

**Through Demons - Three Moments**

 **.**

* * *

.

 **1.**

Meeting teal eyes, Kakashi blinked back his incredulity, "I have a _clone_?"

"No." Toshiro denied bluntly, adding, "Besides, I am older so it would be me whom has a clone."

Peering at the- minutely- taller, Kakashi hummed, "Should I call you Niisan? People are going to claim we're related anyways."

" _Exactly_." muttered Toshiro, "No need to assist the gossipers."

Ignoring this, Kakashi continued on musingly, "Though, emotionally, I have more experience since I was a shinobi so perhaps I should be Niisan…"

 **2.**

Catching the Toshiro's incredulous look Kakashi said by way of explanation, "Saa…Urahara-taichō grows on you." He paused, considered that, and added musingly. "A bit like a fungus, actually."

 **3.**

"Hatake…-" Toshiro started.

" _No_." Kakashi growled back, "I don't believe it. Urahara-taichō is a lot of things but he wouldn't do that. _He was framed_." Then weaker, "He _has_ to be."

His best friend, only friend honestly, spoke slowly, as if he were planning out what he was saying as he said it. "I do not know Urahara-taichō enough to form my own opinion on what he has been accused of and, while I trust your judgement, you have no evidence to support your opinion to disprove his apparent guilt."

A beat of silence then he heard the other shift, adding hesitantly. "I would not be…unwilling to assist you in this."


	30. Snippets 2

**Snippets 2**

 **.**

* * *

.

Paralyzed 'verse - Edo Tensai

" _You weren't there!_ " Obito snarled, suddenly so _very_ furious. "You were _never_ there when we needed you! Not when I was half dead and trapped, listening to Rin's screams as the cave collapsed! Not when Rin _killed herself_ and her last words were an _apology_ to you for not being strong enough!" Getting that feeling that came with controlling Edo Tensai, Obito sneered as he delivered the final nail to the coffin. "You weren't there for _Kakashi_."

Minato flinched, as he always did whenever anyone brought up his first student, but he full on recoiled when he saw a head of white on a tiny, animated corpse of a chūnin.

Obito grinned, arm curling around the passive body of the dead chūnin. "Ne, why don't you inform _Sensei_ of his mistakes, _Kakashi-chan_?"

No body, _no body_ , was prepared for what came out of the chūnin's mouth. "You killed me, Sensei."

? - Because I Read "Project Tatterdemalion" by Vathara

Kakashi huffed in amusement when he felt _::yes-fun-yes chase prey-squealers who flee going_ ukh! ukh! _::_ and sent back : _amusement-exasperation of hunter-companion who is like a pup. Hunger! Bring for kill! For food-yes-good-food!:_

 _::apology. Fun-chase of prey-squealers::_ the other sent after a beat followed by _::yes-hunger yes food-yes-good-food! Close but will bring! Bring for pounce- for good-food-yes-eat-food!::_

Kakashi didn't send anything back, a screeching squeal of fear piercing the air near him and he shifted into a better position to pounce as he got _::roar! Spark-nip at prey-squealers so to flee towards kill-maker::_

Crashing Through The 4th Wall

 _Well, this is new._ Kakashi thought, staring at the poster he had liberated from a store wall.

 ** _Naruto Shippuden the Movie: The Will of Fire_** it read in bold writing at the top left corner, the picture itself was blank save for the shinobi- Naruto and his friends- whom looked as if they were about to jump into a battle with someone that wasn't shown with the date **August 2009** added at the bottom as if an afterthought.

…it also explained the weird looks and odd compliment he got for his 'costume'.

It did not explain where he was or how he got there.

Kakashi took a deep breath, _Prioritize._ He told himself sternly, _information, shelter, food and then work on getting back._

He nodded, affirming the thought before performing a henge into a black haired, brown eyed person with a more fitting outfit. Tucking the poster away with a mental note to check out the…'series'…later, Kakashi stepped out of the alley he had hidden in and out onto the street once more.

Project Still Water

"Kirigakure has been out of communication with the rest of the Hidden Villages for over twelve days, anyone whom has travelled there has yet to return- this has been making the other Kage twitchy. Thus it was decided that each village would send out a team three ANBU each to investigate the situation," Inu-taichō glanced at his teammates, Tora and Usagi, and added, "Hokage-sama believes that Kirigakure may be gearing up for another war."


	31. What Would Change

**What Would Change?**

 **.**

* * *

.

\- Trains:

So, I finally got around to listening to my brother and looking into _Baccano_ (though honestly it was mostly just the opening + TvTropes page) and what struck me was the train.

Then I remembered that the Land of Snow has a train so I started wondering, why not have trains elsewhere? Now imagine that each of the larger nations has their own set series of tracks (though none are connected to other nations because shinobi may have conceded to trains they will not let an easy connection for rivals). Imagine a straightaway Konoha-Suna track project when Gaara becomes Kazekageand the _trust_ it would imply.

 _Just-_

 _-just **imagine it.**_

\- Earth:

If the Naruto had been merged with our own, would they all stay in Japan? Or would they want more room, more territory, and head to different places? Would each of the Great Villages claim a continent as their own?

Would villages pop up for each country? Or would villages decided on a territory and treat the countries that fall into their territory as clients?

Would they be self-sufficient? Or depend on their 'host' country?

Would they be independent? Or would they have to abide by the 'host' country's laws?

How does this change history? What would a World War look like if shinobi were present? Would they attempt to stop certain technology being released? Or would they embrace technology?

Would there still be three (four) Shinobi Wars? Or would being able to spread out more prevent it?

Would shinobi allow things like freeways and cities take place of nature? Or would they fight to preserve the land as it originally was? How would the world look like if they do?

Would they use their 'host' country's currency? Or would shinobi have their own currency? If so, could they use it outside of a village or would they need to exchange it?

What about summons? Do they have their own world? Do they effect transportation? Are they more common or less? Would the same summon be connected to Earth as the Elemental Nations or would there be new ones? Would they still be capable of speech?

What of chakra? Does everyone have it? Or only those in villages? Why is that?

What about recreation? Would the chūnin exams still exist as they did? Or would there have to be a 'civilian-friendly' tournament? Would there be a shinobi version of the Olympics?

What about the people? Can anyone decided to join a village? Or do they need to have a 'sponsor'? Can anyone leave the village to live somewhere else? Or are they stuck living in the village? Or is it only ninja who can't leave? How does the outside world effect on what the Academy teaches?


	32. Snippets 3

**Snippets 3**

 **.**

* * *

.

Dead Not Gone

"What happened?" the Sandaime asked briskly upon arrival.

Confused and shocked as they were, Minato and Kushina's attention snapped to the man from where they hovered beside Kakashi holding Naruto. Kakashi answered, "Namikaze Minato and Uzumaki Kushina are dead."

 _"Kashi-chan!"_ His wife cried, distressed at the blank, deadened voice the teen used- one that had been used after Sakumo's death than Obito's followed by Rin's.

Sandaime-sama, not having heard her, continued. "And the Kyuubi."

"The Yondaime gave his life to seal it again," his student intoned lowly, a half second pause before adding. "The new jinchuriki of the Kyuubi is…me."

His eyes widened even as Kushina shouted, _"What!?"_

A Silver Fox

His paw tentatively prodded at the solid, not-alive and leaf-lost tree that stood shorter than normal trees with branches as thick as it's trunk spouting off at intervals that were exactly two paw-lengths apart to connect on other trunks on either side of the first in a seemingly endless cycle. He who was nameless but called Gin or Shiro or Yuki or Kit whenever necessary sniffed at the odd tree-thing briefly before sticking the tip of his snout between the branches to sniff at the lands beyond, curious of the animals that smelled of meadows-that-weren't-meadows and the wolves-that- _weren't_ and the plants-that-shouldn't-yet-be-grown.

With a puzzled sneeze, he pulled his snout out and angled his head to look between the branches- spying a wooden cave-thing that's mouth seemed to be capable of moving unlike other caves, beyond it were smaller wood-things that were less cave and more _den_ that was not in the ground. _Curious._

Let it not be said that foxes, whether they be of red fur or white or any other color of fur, did not satisfy their own curiosity. Thus, with only a passing thought to the potential dangers, used the horizontal branches of the not-alive tree thing to climb to the top before jumping down into the other land's side.

Tail held high, he trotted forwards to investigate.

Monster At Home

There was a monster in Konoha. It wasn't in the village, not visible for the civilians to see and notice, but it had taken over one of the training grounds, one of the most infamous- the Forest of Death. The forest wasn't a popular place- only in consistent use for around a week once half a decade and it was during that time that Kakashi stumbled across the monster.

Four Moments (With Minato)

 **Responsibility:** _Once, Minato swore to himself to protect Kakashi with all that he had- he just never knew that he would have to against his own village._

 **Being a Leader:** _After dealing with Kakashi- the fiercely independent genius of a child- Minato believed that taking on a team of Genin would be simple- he couldn't have been more wrong._

 **The Libra:** _Rin, Minato thought, was the balancer that kept the team from collapsing._

 **Bring Honor to Us:** _Obito was cheerful, energetic and full of life- Minato couldn't help but feel sad looking at him._


	33. Time Travel - Anbu 2

**Time Travel - ANBU 2**

 **.**

* * *

.

It was as he was searching over the village to find out where his sensei and father were (restaurant with Kushina-nēchan, Council meeting) to make sure he could try to relearn his body movements when he brushed over a chakra that did not belong yet one he _knew_ \- freezing at the thought that another came back with him. A questioning prod of his chakra earned Kakashi a flicker of recognition than his squad's version of identity confirmation.

Uchiha Itachi was in the past also.

He was running instantly, barely pausing to make a clone to stay in bed should Tōsan or Sensei decide to check on him- mentally tagging both of their chakra so he wouldn't run into them when he was suppose to be sick in bed- coiling his chakra tightly around himself to keep them from wondering why his chakra was split in two different places.

He changed directions abruptly when he felt Itachi flare his chakra in a way that would make those who weren't of their squad think that the boy had been surprised then got angry over it, he was aware that it was signaling their meeting place- Training Ground 17. Kakashi got there first, Itachi arriving moments after followed Tenzo- they waited a beat but no one else arrived.

"Sitrep, ascension, bones." He ordered after allowing them to assess one another.

Itachi, the team whelp, spoke up immediately. "I am an Uchiha, age five, orphan in clan district."

Tenzo, former whelp, spoke after. "Age five, orphan in civilian sector."

"Age six. Placement as it was. No Sharingan." He informed them shortly. "I assume you've all ascertained this isn't a genjutsu?" He asked, continuing at their confirmations. "We seem to have arrived the week before the end of my chūnin exams. Reason- unknown."

"The _'how'_ leaves much to be desired also, Senpai." Tenzo pointed out wryly.

Itachi, in the tone he used when he was just keeping his emotions in check, said, "The most important thing is to decide what to do now."

"For now we will accumulate ourselves to our new bodies, make sure you can move smoothly and test your capabilities- discretely. Gather intel on yourself and your situation, what is your name? Who knows you? How do you act? Do you have a history or did you just appear?" He decided, adding- partially out of want to keep Rin and Obito from him (they died the last time they were on his team) and partially to keep his fellow time travelers with him- after, "After I become a chūnin, I should be able to convince Sensei to take you on and make us a team- it's best if we kept near one another- so be certain you have a paper trail by than."

Backs straightening and saluting in a way that was ridiculously adorable, "Yes, senpai!"

"Good. Unless something happens, we will meet in six days at my signal." He told them. "Dismissed."

The two took off, he quirked an amused smile behind his mask at their lack of fluidness.

 **.:.**

 **Where In Kakashi Hustles His Sensei**

 **.:.**

"Anou…Sensei?" Kakashi started when he arrived at the training grounds.

Blue eyes blinked at him, "Yes?"

"Why don't I have a team?" He asked, tilting his head in a way that Kushina-nēchan had sworn made him look like a curious puppy and utterly _adorable_.

Sensei attempted to smother a grin which, he supposed, proved Kushina-nēchan right. "Those of your age group aren't at your level and those older are already assigned."

He huffed and pouted just so- enough that it was visible (to those who knew him at least) but not excessive in a way that would appear fake. "But Tōsan says that teammates are important and teamwork is what makes us Konoha shinobi…" Then, eagerly and pleadingly in a way that seemed as if he just thought of it, he asked. "What if I found someone who can be my teammates, will you teach them?"

"Ahh, it doesn't exactly work that way, Kakashi…" the blond trailed off after catching sight of him.

Channeling Pakkun's infamous 'puppy eyes' he begged, " _Please_ Sensei? Both you and Tōsan say a team's a shinobi's most important tool. Oh!" he cried as if a thought just hit him, "What if I win the tournament? Would you promise to at least see if whoever I find could be my teammates?"

Relieved at the 'out' (inwardly he wondered if he should feel bad that he was using his knowledge of his sensei and the exam against the man), Sensei smiled, ruffling his hair. "Sure."

"It's a promise," He told the man solemnly. "You can't go back on your word."

Grinning now, "Ah. I won't Kakashi. Now, anything you wanted my help with specifically?"

"Hmm…" He furrowed his brow in the impression of deep thought. "Can two elements be combined? Like raiton and suiton?"

That got him a startled look before the teen started to speak, and Kakashi let his sensei's voice wash over him.

 **.**

"Sen-sei~!" Kakashi, proud owner of a comically overly large (for him) chūnin vest, beamed up at the flabbergasted blond. "Remember your promise?"

"I…" Blue eyes blinked. "Yes..?"

Ignoring Jiraiya sharing a bemused look with Tōsan, Kakashi continued. "So can I bring them home for you to meet? Should the Hokage be there too?"

"What's going on?" Tōsan cut in.

Kakashi, refraining from smirking at his sensei's lost look, answered promptly. "Sensei promised that if I won the tournament that he would test two people that I picked to act as my teammates- 'cause Tōsan says that being on a team is important for a shinobi but _I_ wasn't." Blinking innocently he added as an after thought. "On a team, that is."

"Well," Jiraiya laughed, clapping his student's shoulder. "I suppose I'll get Sensei and bring him to your place, 'Kumo- he'll definitely want to see _this_."

Tōsan glanced at him, saw the 'Pakkun puppy-eyed' face he wore, and wrapped an arm around Sensei companionably. "Kakashi, go get your…ah…potential teammates- I'll make sure your sensei is ready to test them."

From the way the blond paled, Kakashi guessed that was a threat but he didn't particularly care as it worked in his favor. "Thanks, Tōsan!"


	34. Chats

**Chats**

 **.**

* * *

.

Word of the Day (6/6/2016) - Gegenschein:

 **Kakashi:** _*watching Sai ignore Naruto*_ How does that happen?

 **Yamato:** _*bewildered*_ How does what happen?

 **Kakashi:** How is it that teams always seem to have an energetic, optimistic _sun_ of a person _AND_ basically their reflection?

Legend of Zelda casting:

 **Obito:** _*staring at script*_ O-oi! How come Sensei's the main character!?

 **Kakashi:** _*scoffs*_ You just want to be Link so you can rescue a princess- who you're probably hoping is Rin.

 **Obito:** _*turns red and sputters*_ Y-you-!

 **Rin:** _*amused*_ Maybe I would be Navi and you would be Zelda, Kakashi-kun.

 **O** **bito:** _*pales and turns to stone*_ ...

 **Kakashi:** _*ears turn red*_ A-ah...

 **Minato:** _*laughing*_ I think you broke them, Rin-chan.

 **Rin:** _*utterly unrepentant*_ I apologize Sensei.

 **Kakashi:** _*shakes himself then coughs*_ U-um. If you're Link, Sensei, does that mean Kushina is going to be Zelda?

 **Minato:** _*sweatdrops*_ Aa. She's going to be angry over being a princess...


	35. Broken Fourth Wall

**Broken Fourth Wall**

 **(With Team Minato)**

 **.**

* * *

.

Team Minato and the "First Mission":

 **Obito:** _*gleeful*_ Aw, you were so cute Bakashi!

 **Kakashi:** _*glaring, ears red*_ Shut up!

 **Rin:** _*giggling*_ Sorry Kakashi-kun, but you were adorable.

 **Minato:** _*grinning*_ All my students are adorable but there's just something about Kakashi as a genin...

 **Obito:** _*laughing*_ I can't believe you actually had a mask at that age!

 **Rin:** _*kindly*_ I think it suits you.

 **Minato:** _*wistful*_ Kakashi-chan once accidentally called me 'Niisan'.

 **Kakashi:** _*sullen and red faced*_ ...I hate you all.

.

Team Minato and the "Litter!":

 **Obito:** _*horrified*_ Why would anyone want MORE of you!?

 **Kakashi:** _*flatly*_ They're not clones. They siblings- not me.

 **Rin:** _*sympathetically*_ Poor Hatake-san, it must of been exhausting having that many children.

 **Minato:** _*mock solemnly*_ Those poor, poor genin. They probably think you have split personalities.

 **Obito:** _*grudgingly*_ Well, Kama doesn't seem THAT bad..

 **Rin:** _*grinning*_ I think Kama is cute but I like Botan best- it would be nice to have another girl around.

 **Minato:** _*thoughtfully*_ Hm, I suppose Enoki seems the most level-headed.

 **Kakashi:**... _*huffs*_ Kuwa...might...be interesting to have as a brother.

.

* * *

 **Tags!**

 **.**

 **First Mission: # _Genin!Kakashi is adorable #no one can convince me otherwise #Obito is having too much fun #poor Kakashi #Minato just really wants to be called 'niisan'_**

 **Litter!: # _One Kakashi is enough for Obito #Minato is amused #Rin is sympathetic #Kakashi just wants this over with_**


	36. Tags

**Tags**

 **[Because I think they're interesting]**

 **.**

* * *

.

#kid kakashi  
#d-rank mission

#hatake litter  
#if kakashi had siblings  
#introduction to team 7  
#team 7 thinks he has multiple personalities

#kakashi as sakumo's cousin  
#kakashi and minato are neighbors  
#does not remember the past (future? time travel is confusing)

#reincarnated as another character  
#Kakashi is sirius

#alternate universe  
#au - thief guild

#homeless!kakashi

#jinchuuriki!kakashi

#its a boy  
#proud papa

#genderbend

#multiple Kakashi

#mundane  
#(-ish)  
#countdown

#pokemon egg  
#baby pokemon  
#pokemon evolution  
#sunkern  
#sunflora  
#Mr Ukki

#Gintama opening

#teen!sakumo  
#kid!kakashi  
#kid!minato

#emotionally stunted awkwardness  
#(that I find adorable)

#(though most don't know since he goes by Hake Kama)

#Henohenomoheji-san  
#Side note: I have weird dinner conversations  
#and awesome siblings  
#(who are honestly responsible for half this stuff because of dinner conversations sparking ideas)

#The Council  
#The Failed Mission

#Paralyzed  
#adult horror  
#adult fear

#it's obito's fault  
#always.  
#Kakashi regrets everything  
#he is also not one of those people  
#because of obito  
#obito's middle name is 'damn-you'  
#according to Kakashi

#AYH  
#Are You Happy  
#Kakashi starts to go quietly insane  
#but he gets better

#they're hunting boars  
#giant mutant ones that can sense chakra but boars none the less  
#I am pretty sure that Kakashi's partner is suppose to be Obito  
#but...meh  
#(I just wanted the chance to use things like yes-fun-yes chase)

#Hatake Kakashi  
#(is a troll)  
#Namikaze Minato  
#(is trying)  
#Uzumaki Kushina  
#(is done with this)

#moments in a 'verse

#(entirely self-indulgent)  
#Young!Sakumo  
#Sakumo's ninken  
#Sakumo's father  
#Sakumo's father's ninken  
#basically the Hatake as a clan  
#(that all have ninken)

#what would change  
#trains #imagination  
#just imagine it  
#(dammit)

#I am weak  
#and easily influenced  
#(apparently)  
#Kakashi is a little shit  
#and a troll  
#poor hokages  
#Tsunade is dreading what her name will become when she dies  
#(except ya know it's alread something like god in the medic nin circles)

#fox!kakashi

#demon!kakashi

#word of the day (6/6/2016)  
#- first thing that came to mind when I read definition

#chat  
#commenting on a post  
#Team Minato  
#Genin!Kakashi is adorable  
#no one can convince me otherwise  
#Obito is having too much fun  
#poor Kakashi  
#Mianto just really wants to be called 'niisan'  
#B4W  
#(basically Team Minato breaks the 4th wall by commenting on my post 'First Mission')

#chat  
#commenting on a post  
#B4W  
#(basically Team Minato commenting on my post 'Litter!')  
#One Kakashi is enough for Obito  
#Mianto is amused  
#Rin is sympathetic  
#Kakashi just wants this over with


	37. Premonition

**Premonition**

 **.**

* * *

.

 _ **Blood.** _

_So much blood- covering the floor- covering_ Tōsan-

 _ **It's Tōsan's.** _

_No._

 _Oh, please- please, no._

 _Not Tōsan- don't be dead._

 _Please._

 _I need you._

 _Why?_ _Why did you kill yourself?_

 _Am I not enough?_

 _Are they more important to you? You left me. Do you not care? Was I not a good enough son?_

 _Did you even love me?_

 _ **No.** You can't have. _

_You would have lived if you did- lived for me._

 _Their opinions wouldn't have mattered as much._

 _Get up._

Please.

 _I don't know what to do._

 _Get up._

I still need you.

 _ **Please.** _

_Just._

 _Get._

 _Up-_

 **I love you.**

.

.

.

Hatake Kakashi woke up panting, tears gathering in his eyes and it took all of five seconds for him to recognize that it was a nightmare then another five to realize with rising horror that it was something entirely possible given the current circumstances.

Eleven seconds after waking he was barreling out of his room in search of his father- tears starting to fall the longer he went without finding the man- and panic surged through him as he continuously failed in his search. Going down the stairs he had to use chakra to keep himself from falling but this didn't slow him any as he ran down the hall- hitting the wall when he skidded to a stop as he turned into the kitchen.

"Kakashi-" His father started, sounding bewildered.

He was scrambling to his feet immediately and colliding into the man in a particularly tight hug, "Tōsan!"

"Kakashi, what-?" And then, as much as Kakashi didn't want to admit it, he was sobbing as his father's arms started, slowed by confusion, to reciprocate his hug.

By the time that he calmed down, he was cradled in his father's lap on the couch while the man made soft noises of reassurance. Tōsan took this as a queue, "Can you tell me what happened?"

"…you were dead. You killed yourself and I found you." He whispered the horrifying truth- ignoring the body beneath him stiffening- and then repeating, because it too terrible not to. "Tōsan, you were dead. You can't die," it was almost begging but he didn't care as he twisted to cling to his- still alive- father. "You can't leave me, Tōsan. I still need you-"

Then, partly because he hardly ever said it anymore and partly because his father needed to hear it, he said fervently, "I still love you Tōsan."

"I-…" Tōsan faltered, swallowed then continued. "Kakashi, I promise I won't leave you."


	38. Forever Team Minato

**Forever Team Minato**

 **.**

* * *

.

"I'm back," there was no response but then, that was expected given that a memorial couldn't speak back. "It's been a bit longer then usual, huh? Sorry…I didn't expect things to get so…hectic, I suppose."

A sigh sounded as a hand dragged through hair. "They made me a sensei- I'm actually going to meet them after this. I never really thought I'd be one- it was something that I always imagined that you would be, Obito." Here the tone became wistful. "Your energy would be good with dealing with kids. Ne, Sensei, did we ever make you feel old with our antics?"

 _Ha, all the time! That's just what happens when you're teaching the next generation._ The words came easily, as if the man was standing there next to the memorial and just watch, patiently waiting to hear whatever else that may be said.

It should probably be worrying how vivid these…hallucinations were but really, it was just a relief to still be part of the team in a way.

"I got your son as a student, Sensei- Obito's little cousin, your _Itachi-chan_ 's otouto. Also a civilian girl. They remind me of us, you know? The energetic boy crushing on the girl who is in turn enamored with the broody genius. Though they're different also.

Sakura-chan is very much aware of Naruto-kun's crush- not that your son's very subtle about that Sensei, it seems he really does take after Kushina more- and is very…adamant about her rejections. Naruto-kun doesn't have something like the Sharingan to strive for so, while he also wants to prove himself to those that call him failure, he does it with more…creativity then Obito. Sasuke-kun…he-…he's very motivated, he tends to get tunnel vision and sees himself as above his teammates but he can work with them." Another sigh, though this one was more tired then the first.

 _Don't stop there,_ Obito's ghost laughed, _tell us more- did you give them the bell test?_

"Yeah." The word was fond and nostalgic. "I did give them the bell test. They completely failed at first, it was kind of amusing- they were like ninken pups trying to complete their first mock-mission. Sasuke-kun and Sakura-chan hid but Naruto-kun…he called me out then rushed straight ahead like it was some kind of samurai duel. Naruto-kun fell for traps easily and Sakura-chan was susceptible to low ranked genjutsu. Sasuke-kun did better, in a way, but his pride will get him in real trouble some day. They only passed after Naruto-kun was tied to the log."

 _Aw, man._ Obito laughed in surprised delight. _I can't believe you actually tied one of them to a log! Sensei's son at that!_

A smile threatened when Sensei laughed, _It's good that you're not giving special treatment just because he's my son! Now, what about D-Ranks?_

A groan threatened, "Your son Sensei, just- your son. The trouble he gets into. We go walk Inuzuka dogs and he gets dragged through a field of explosives. We clean up a river and he get's dragged down a waterfall. We get a job weeding and he pulls out the wrong plants. It's almost _painful_. I'm worried that I'll take them on a C-Rank only to find out that it's actually an A-Rank."

 _It can't be that bad._ Obito insisted.

Sensei smiled, _Even if it does happen, I have faith that you're more then capable of protecting them._

A smile came but there was no comment beyond continuing. "I have to drop off vegetables for Naruto-kun and switch them out with his instant ramen for him to eat healthy. I have to push Sakura-chan into eating more then what her 'diet' calls for, I worry she's going to pass out if we ever do a mission more straining then a D-Rank. Sasuke-kun I have to remind him to eat, sometimes he forgets when he's training."

 _Maybe they should call you Kaachan instead of Sensei._ Obito teased.

"Idiot." The word was fond though so it only got a laugh.

 _You should go or you'll be late._ Sensei said.

 _ **Later** you mean. Of all the bad habits to pick up from Obito, it had to be the lateness?_

Obito glared playfully. _Oi! I'm an awesome role model!_

 _Terrible time-keeper._ The final ghost of the team stood, leaning against the memorial but angled at Obito. _How is that a good role model?_

A smile. "They're right Obito- I have to go."

Rin left, grinning at Obito's sputtering, Sensei's laughter and Kakashi's teasing.

.

* * *

.

 **Be honest. When did you realize the speaker was Rin? Right at the start when I didn't write 'he' or 'him' or 'Kakashi'? Or at the very end? Did the mention of ninken throw you off?**


	39. Crossover - Hogwarts, Reborn 2

**Crossover - Hogwarts, Reborn 2**

 **.**

* * *

.

Regulus,

I'm sure you'll have heard (I fully expect a Howler sometime during breakfast) but I suppose I should tell you anyways- I am now a **Hufflepuff** . If you think it would help (I know you don't like it when our family is at odds with one another) then you can tell them that the Sorting Hat said that I _would_ fit in well at Slytherin- it said the same for Ravenclaw, incidentally, and discarded Gryffindor simply because I wouldn't like the attention.

[I know what our parents would say, but I am proud to be eligible for each house- being cunning, intelligent, brave and loyal isn't something to be ashamed of.]

As for my opinion of my House? I like it, even if we have to crawl to get in the Common room (or Sett as it's referred as).

You remember those stories Orion told us of the first time entering the Slytherin Common Room? Of how there would be a speech given by the eldest set of prefects on proper behavior in public, of how any discontent with a fellow Slytherin would be dealt with outside of the knowledge of non-Slytherins and that Slytherins are to present a united front in public regardless of personal beliefs or grudges.

Hufflepuff is different, the entire house is present and we have three speeches;

 _"Welcome."_ The first speech started off, warm and welcoming. _"I know what others say of us, I am aware of their opinions and how they tend to base how they interact with the House on that…"_ Then it became sad and sorrow-filled, as if the speaker were grieving. _"So I must ask you to do something for me, it will hard- it might be the most difficult thing you will do but I have faith that you will all be able to rise to meet the challenge."_ It changed to firm and encouraging. _"I ask you this...when they call you talentless, I ask that you congratulate them on their achievements. When they tell you that you're rejects, that you were put here because you couldn't make it anywhere else, I ask that you be patient with them because it is not their fault for being misinformed. When they call you slow, or an idiot or even a 'duffer', I ask that you take it with a smile so you may focus on your studies. Most of all, I ask that you forgive the ones whom insult you in their ignorance."_

There was a pause to let that settle before the tone became fierce and protective. _"This does not mean I ask that you sit back and allow others to attack you. No, you are a Badger now and we badgers protect our own."_ It was said with a kind of possessive protectiveness that was echoed in a rumbling murmur of every veteran Hufflepuff. _"We are tolerant, we are hard workers, we strive for kindness and fairness- this is true. To say we are afraid to fight, that is a lie- we are simply patient and tolerant enough to wait for something worth fighting for. Above all, we are loyal; to harm one is to harm all, we will defend ours at all costs."_ It was said like a promise, though if others were present it could have been a treat.

 _"This is what it means to be a Badger. This is our home, our family, our House- our_ Clan _and_ **_it is worth protecting_ ** _."_ Here you could tell that the speech was coming to an end though that didn't make it any less powerful. _"We are one House, one Clan, and we help each other in any way we can, from this day forward you will_ **_never_ ** _be alone-_ that _is what it means to be a_ Hufflepuff _."_

This speech was given by the portrait of Helga Hufflepuff, the one that followed was given by the eldest prefects after everyone had settled.

I'll leave out this one because it is mostly just a reminder of how to get into the Sett, where the dorms are, where to find a prefect at which time, how baths are communal though showers are available if necessary, that we are to pick up after ourselves and Hufflepuffs do their own laundry.

After came our Head of House, Pomona Sprout (it's her first year as a Head), who gave us a black-yellow bracelet with two charms (a badger and claw) and then announced that it was time for mentors to choose their cub (how first years are referred as by the House).

 _"Your mentor will show you the ropes,"_ she told us. _"They will be in charge of waking you up in time to get ready, they will act as your guide and help you with things like homework or just anything in general. We are all a Clan but you will be their Cub."_

It's like they're training upper years in their futures as potential parents. My mentor is one Amos Diggory, fifth year (only fifth and seventh years were mentors).

From there the meeting shifted into more of a party, sixth years popping out to get things from the kitchens while first years got to know their mentors. Our mentors took us on rounds around the room to meet every other student before they, collectively, showed us where our dorms were along with the bathroom before sending us off to bed with warnings that we'd regret not sleeping all we could on our first night.

Diggory came at 5:30 to wake me (of course I was already awake by then), ordered me to grab my things for the day then led to the bath. You recall stories of the prefect bath? This is bigger- it was like a _sento_ or _onsen_ .

As we walked to the bath, the temperature rose steadily and by the time we reached the place to tuck our stuff away, undress (and put our dirty clothes in a hamper that had our name stitched into it in bold, black letters) and get everything we would need for bathing, I was starting to sweat. The bath was warm bordering on hot, towels were allowed around the waist in the water (though only really first and second years did so) and people (mainly first, fifth and seventh years) were chatting while they bathed. After bathing-

 _(Seventh years tend to tell stories of their years at Hogwarts, mentioning which secret passages they stumbled upon, the oddest reasons the earned detention, what kind of DADA teachers they had and the like- along with stories they had heard when_ they _were first years [oral history passed down all the way from the Founders' Era]. It was interesting and enlightening- did you know that Helga Hufflepuff and Rowena Ravenclaw once hung Godric Gryffindor and Salazar Slytherin from their undergarments when the men stumbled upon them bathing, keeping them there until the two were done bathing?)_

-we rinse off with lukewarm/cool water, dry off (mentors start teaching you drying charms), get dressed, grab your school things (while returning your bathing things) then go down a tunnel that exits near the Great Hall.

We arrived for breakfast at 6:45 (also being taught a spells to tell time, date and weather along with how to set yourself an alarm), I started this letter then- alternating between eating and writing. It's now 7:20 (time is the only spell I've mastered of those my mentor is teaching me, Diggory was so proud it was almost a bit embarrassing) and I've gotten my timetable already so I'll put it down for you, yeah?

 **Monday;**  
Transfiguration  
 _-Break_  
DADA  
 _-Lunch_  
Charms (x2)  
 _-Break_  
History of Magic

 **Tuesday;**  
Transfiguration  
 _-Break_  
History of Magic  
 _-Lunch_  
Herbology (x2)

 **Wednesday;**  
Transfiguration  
 _-Break_  
Charms (x2)  
 _-Lunch_  
Potions (x2)

 **Thursday;**  
Transfiguration  
 _-Break_  
History of Magic  
 _-Lunch_  
DADA (x2)

 **Friday;**  
Herbology (x2)  
 _-Break_  
Potions (x2)  
 _-Lunch_  
DADA  
 _-Dinner_  
Astronomy ( midnight)

Transfiguration with Gryffindor, Potions with Ravenclaw and DADA with Slytherin- flying classes don't have a set time ye **-**

Ah. The Howler has arrived. I'll end my letter here (unless I don't get the chance to send it before class in which case I'll tell you about my day).

 ** _ ** _\- Your brother._ **_**

.

* * *

.

 **Basically Kakashi-as-Sirius writes to his brother after being sorted into Hufflepuff. (Featuring some of my headcanons of Hufflepuff) [I am a Hufflepuff {according to Pottermore}, can you see my House Pride?]**


	40. The Forest

**The Forest**

 **.**

* * *

.

 _Don't go into the forest._

Those five words were repeated often enough throughout the world, for the citizens of Hi no Kuni it was altered just a bit.

 _Don't go into Hashirama Forest._

Because while the forests, at large, were safe for those whom called Hi no Kuni home, Hashirama Forest was something else entirely.

It was made up of trees so strong it was said that the most powerful woodsman couldn't even make a scratch in it's wood after a full day of chopping, so large that they towered over every other breed, so thick that if one could carve out a house into its trunk that it would surely be comfortable to house a noble, so rare they grew nowhere else and, if one were to ask one of the Twelve Guardians, so powerful that one couldn't sense individual chakras in the forest just one giant cluster.

The forest was named after Senju Hashirama, the man who grew them- who created them, who some whispered about being a kami donning a mortal body- on land that his brother, Senju Tobirama, had chosen and then declared it home to the shinobi of Konohagakure with his partner, Uchiha Madara.

(Madara was also a presumed mortal-bound kami as he was known to control bijuu with merely a look.

Most, however, viewed Senju Hashirama and Uchiha Madara and all those that followed as monsters.)

 _Don't go into Hashirama Forest,_ children are told, repeatedly and fearfully. _It is the home monsters; nothing returns from there that hasn't been turned into a monster also._


	41. Seven - Sixth, Avatar

**Seven - Sixth, Avatar**

 **.**

* * *

.

 **System Notice:**

 ** _A new player has entered the game! New features unlocked!_ **

**•Skills:** _the learned capacity to carry out pre-determined results- can be leveled up by using Ability Points._

 **•Dungeons:** _zones, often maze-like, that are filled with monsters and treasure- require a drop to enter, some require party members to enter. Dungeon Create now available!_

 **•Shops:** _a place to buy skill books, gear or potions. Trade and Player Shops now available!_

 **•Quests:** _a task that, when completed, earns a reward- there are different types of quests. Quest Board now available!_

 **•Races:** _different beings come with different advantages- a Player gets 1 free Race Shift Card. Elf, Elemental and Demon are now available!_

 **•Familiars:** _animal companions that can be summoned- different animals have different abilities. Mount(s) are now available!_

In five different places, five people read the notice with varying degrees of interest while elsewhere, a sixth person _woke_.

.

.

.

There was a box before him- it was white with black writing, solid enough that the writing was easy to read but transparent enough for him to see the rest of the blank room beyond it. It was also floating before him at eye level so there was that. He shook himself and read the thing- some distant corner of his mind wondering at how apathetic he was about this development.

 ** _Welcome, Player 6!_ **

**_Please choose a Village._ **

**•Konohagakure**

 **•Sunagakure**

 **•Iwagakure**

 **•Kirigakure**

 **•Kumogakure**

Though he didn't feel like he had an issue with the other villages, there was even a feeling of fondness with Sunagakure, he immediately chose 'Konohagakure' with little thought. The box faded with another replacing it.

 ** _You have chosen Konohagakure as your village. Please choose a name._ **

**Hint: Say name aloud.**

His name came out easily, earning him a little chiming _ding!_ and a new box replacing the other.

 ** _You have remembered your previous name!_ **

**_Would you like to unlock your previous memories?_ **

**[Yes] - [No]**

 **Hint: You will have no other chance to unlock them. Choose wisely.**

 **Hint: Certain things, like Titles, can carry over if you choose Yes.**

That distant part of him seemed to rally, screaming at him to chose 'Yes' which he obeyed and then he _remembered_. Childhood, Academy, Genin, Chūnin, Jōnin, ANBU, Sensei and Hokage- grief, war, death, students, ninken, kohai, victory and _peace_.

Yes, Hatake Kakashi remembered.

From there, with that odd calm insisting everything's alright and this is normal, things sped up quite a bit- he remained human, declined getting a standard familiar, chose Magic as a talent as it was unknown and picked a Magic X affinity as it was the only one without negatives.

Another chiming _ding!_ sounded before the world span away into darkness.


	42. Earth Naruto - IntroducingThe Fox

**Earth!Naruto- Introducing... _The Fox_**

 **.**

 **Who remembers my What Would Change about fusing the Naruto World with Earth?**

* * *

.

"Sakura!" the blond kunoichi cried cheerfully as she dragged her teammate and the other team's kunoichi over, the poor girl's teammates following with the blond's remaining teammate. "You guys met your Sensei already, right? What're they like? Male or female? Hinata-chan has a kunoichi sensei but we have a shinobi. What do you think-"

The teammate she had been dragging freed himself, waving a hand at her. "Troublesome woman. If you want an answer you'll have to wait for it."

The blond whirled on him, jerking the kunoichi still in her grasp but Naruto's attention was drawn by Kiba. "Oi, ramen-brain, did your sensei tell you their specialization?"

"Don't call me that, dog-breath. Sensei didn't really give us a straight answer so I think it might be something to do with Warfare." Naruto told his friend.

To be honest, Inuzuka Kiba was Naruto's only friend his age. The first time they met was when Naruto was two and Gaku came to Konohagakure in it's entirety- given his age and that Gaku was a nomadic village that acted as shepherds for the Great Herd so only remained for a week, he didn't remember that meeting. Nor did he really recall their next meeting at age four beyond a vague memory of meeting Akamaru then and being jealous that he couldn't have a pet. The next time they met was at age six and it was the first time that Naruto had been able to visit Gaku, Kiba acting as a guide- it was also one of the most vivid memories he had as a child.

Trouble came when they went to check out the herd which Kiba had dubbed _'the coolest thing_ _ever'_ telling him _'you gotta see it'_ and Naruto, who have found the village already cool and wanted to see how awesome the herd would be, agreed eagerly. At first, everything was fine and the experience was amazing being able to walk through a group of animals that dwarfed him but then a stampede started and suddenly things were terrifying. They hadn't been hurt, Akamaru's howling loud enough to startled the animals to going around them until an adult ninken had arrived to protect them, and had been lucky in that only a couple dozen horses had been startled rather then the bison but it was terrifying experience and they had been friends ever since.

"Kurenai-sensei has a Warfare class too," Kiba told him, drawing his attention. "She told us that her specialization is mostly prisoner retrieval and supply delivery."

Warfare, Transportation, Information, Relief, Security, Preservation and Civilian were the seven classes that shinobi were divided into. Each class covered a broad array of 'specializations' that a shinobi might have- anything from shipments under Transportation to performance under Civilian.

"Huh." Naruto blinked, wondered if all Sensei were Warfare class then shrugged it off to say. "Sensei told us our team would be working as a Security classed team- did yours say anything like that?"

Kiba nodded, "Yeah, said we'll be operating as a Relief team."

"Asuma-sensei says we'll be Information class." the blond kunoichi's teammate, the one that didn't look like he was falling asleep standing up, chipped in.


	43. Earth Naruto - Info Dump

**Earth!Naruto- Info Dump**

 **.**

* * *

.

\- The two worlds had different timelines, ours went by quicker, when the Worldshift happened, those that came to earth were bound to their original timeline- as were their children and so on. Long short, Naruto peoples age slower and go by their own calendar- one year to them is three to us. So when Naruto says he saw Kiba every two years, it was in actuality every six years that they met.

\- **Worldshift:** the event in which the Elemental world's residences were moved to Earth. Took place over the course of one week, mark of the first- and to date last- time all major nations collaborated to find out what happened.

\- No shinobi reside in Japan, it is neutral ground and where the Land of Iron settled. Basically, Suna is in Africa, Iwa in Europe, Kumo in Eurasia. Kiri and Konoha are special cases. Kiri's civil war causes it to split into multiple 'mini-Kiri's, they are in places like Madagascar, Australia, UK and similar. Konoha has claim over the Americas due to…

\- **War of Isolation:** a war spanning over two years in which Konoha |Hi no Kuni -who were viewed responsible for the shift- were driven out of Asia and into the sea- wherein they eventually made it to the Americas.

\- Due to the majority of Hi no Kuni coming with them, there were troubles with overpopulation. As a result, Konohagakure splintered off into multiple sub-villages that each claim a portion of the name as a nod of acknowledgement to the original ideal (along with a few nods to Hi no Kuni) while the "Main" village is allowed the full name- the entirety of the sub-main villages is simply referred to as The Village.

\- **Konohagakure:** founded by Senju Hashirama and lead by the Hokage, it is the main village and made up of people from all of the sub villages. It is housed by "Ouachita National Forest". _— [This is the village Naruto grew up in]_

\- **Gaku:** spanning throughout N. America, a true nomadic village made up of the Inuzuka, they take 'rests' at other villages- they are the ones who pass along non-urgent messages and move around people who want to go to other villages, they are the ones helping keep The Village unified. They look after the Great Herd. _— [This is the village that Kakashi (and all Inuzuka) grew up in]_

\- Now, the Elementals arrived _more then **150 years** ago_ so the world is different. For one Konoha claimed western America before the big Manifest Destiny surge happened so when they met with the young America, an alliance was hammered out that, while they would technically be American, the west was _theirs_ and incoming settlers would only be able to settle in areas that _they_ chose. This happened all around the world- some more peacefully then others, some settling in remote areas while others literally invaded places they wanted. So, again _different world_. Expect to see some extinct animals still alive, some technology missing along with entirely new technology.

 _\- [Of course there is also the result of chakra usage but I'll keep that surprise for now]_

\- This will be told by four; Sakumo (Dog), Minato (Wolf), Kakashi (Coyote) and Naruto (Fox). They're spread out along the timeline so this will be able to show, in more detail, the effect the the Elementals have on Earth. To drive this home a bit more, here are the years that each were genin: Sakumo-1872 , Minato-1914 , Kakashi-1941 and Naruto-2004. (Why yes, you will see the World Wars).


	44. Curses and Reactions

**Curses and Reactions**

 **.**

* * *

.

You know how sometimes you find characters using a Kage's name/position as a curse? Their reactions to learning that would be hilarious. _Like…_

 _._

 _"_ Shodai _knows how we'll do it," Naruto rolled his shoulders and_ focused _on the task before them. "But we_ **will** _beat that thing, datte-"_

 _Hashirama blinked, took that in then cut the teen off. "Actually, I_ don't _know."_

 _._

 _"_ Nidaime _that hurt!" Genma hissed, experimentally testing how much mobility the injury would cost him._

 _Tobirama stared at the man, "And_ why _is it important that I know that?"_

 _Genma blanched, realizing_ what _he had said and_ who _he had said it with._

 _._

 _"Like_ Sandaime's pipe _wasn't a weapon." Kiba scoffed._

 _Hiruzen closed his eyes and wondered why his shinobi couldn't have waited until at least half a decade before swearing with his name._

 _._

 _Kakashi took in their enemy and started to swear_ Fuu- _paused, took note of who exactly was with him and something like glee lit up in him as he drew out, "_ **Yooondaaaimeee** _."_

 _Minato stumbled "K-Kakashi- you- but- I-_ **why?** _"_

 _Kakashi nearly cackled when the last word came out almost like a wail of despair._

 _._

 **Meanings:**

Shodai | God - as in "God only knows", "God dammit" or "God Damn You"

Nidaime | Shit/fuck - as in "shit/fuck that hurt"

Like Sandaime's pipe wasn't a weapon - "Like hell that's right"

Yooondaaaimeee - "Fuuuck"

* * *

 **Which is your favorite?**

 **Extra:  
 _Tsunade is dreading what her name will become when she dies (except, ya know, it's already something like "god" in the medic-nin circles)_**


	45. Headcanons

**Headcanons**

 **.**

* * *

.

Journal:

I think it would be a custom for a Jōnin-sensei to gift their students with a journal consisting of stuff like life hacks, trick, tips, interesting jutsu, best shops, unspoken rules, odd creatures encountered, short stories/memories and anything else when their student becomes a chūnin. Like;

 **Tip:** _When learning a fire jutsu, remember to bring extra clothes and practice near a body of water- when you mess up, you tend to catch fire._

Shadow Force:

The Shadow Force [named in passing but somehow stuck] is what I see as the village viewing as ANBU overall. Those actually a part of it would divide it into

ANBU, Oinin, Yami, Shinigami and Akuma.

 **ANBU:** _ninja whom take high-risk, high-priority, information-sensitive and/or suicidal missions. The things they do are things like sabotage, assassination, infiltration and theft._

 **Oinin:** _ninja whose main job is to hunt traitors. They are the ones who chase after ninja whom leave the village, they are also in charge of investigating to uncover traitors and/or traps in/near the village._

 **Yami:** _ninja whose primary job is infiltration. Unlike ANBU, they infiltrate and stay under cover for extended periods of time [shortest recorded is two weeks while longest so far is fourteen years], they are the villages primary spies and are the ones who handle seduction missions._

 **Shinigami:** _ninja who mainly deal with the dead. They are the ones who go out to retrieve dead bodies of fallen ninja, ninja of the village have their bodies "sealed" to allow for burial, enemy ninja are dissected and studied._

 **Akuma:** _ninja who deal with interrogation with higher priority targets then regular T &I. They are the ones whom take care of ninja the Oinin deliver, they are the wardens of the Maggot's Nest and are rumored to have a "re-education" program._

Idioms/Saying:

When in Rome, do as the Romans do - _When in Sunagakure, do as the Suna nin do._

Penny for your thoughts - _Ryo for your thoughts?_

Drop of a hat - _At the word of your Kage._

The ball is in your court - _The kunai's in your hand._

Bes thing since sliced bread - _Best thing since Storage Scrolls._

A blessing in disguise - _An ally undercover._

Judge a book by it's cover - _Judge an ANBU by their mask._

Don't cry over spilt milk - _Don't cry for lost kunai._

Don't put all your eggs in one basket - _Don't put all your kunai in one pouch._

Takes two to tango - _Takes two to spar._

Every cloud has a silver lining - _Every border has an outpost._

If there were Daemons:

I don't think Kakashi's daemon would ever really settle, more of shifting through a certain pool of animals that display traits enhancing however Kakashi is choosing to act at the moment.

People in general believe that Kakashi is broken/wrong due to this. He, however, views it as how his daemon displays her own "mask" for all that it's not cloth like his.

Summons, World:

I think that the summons all live on a different plane of existence, kind of like the Kamui World, with individual summon species (ie. Dogs, toads, snakes, hawks) residing in their own pocket dimensions.

I also believe that each pocket has a way out to both the Human World (like perhaps hawks have an opening high in the sky, above the clouds and out of sight) and the Summon World; the Human World exit is, in case a summoner dies before passing on their contract, for summons to seek out new contractors.

The Summons World exit is a bit more tricky.

 _A._ A hopeful summoner can reverse summon there to seek out a contact, this is uncommon as summons don't tend to appreciate strangers crashing about into their territory and summoners get lost easily because markers aren't meant for humans. Some succeed, though almost always with a companion plus their summon to act as a guide and show of faith.

 _B._ This is wild, unclaimed, neutral territory that exists for four reasons:

• Stability of individual pocket dimensions/territories, including the addition of new summons and their territory.  
• Meetings between summons- be it business, friendly or hostile.  
• Survival here is seen as a right of passage with the time depending on the species- anywhere from a day to a week to a month to a year (like…mice a day, cat a week, dog a month, bird a year). Of course individuals may stay longer to prove themselves.  
• Criminals and Outcasts are sent here (timing dependent on the severity of the "crime"), free game as food.

Writing:

I do actually put some thought into, basically useless, details. What people write with, for example;

 _[ he awkwardly gripped the box-like, eraser-less pencil and he very much missed the circular ones he had been accustomed to (even those newer 'mechanical' pencils would have been preferable to these)]_

I see Sakumo's Generation using older pencils, the square-ish ones with no erasers. Minato's generation would be bulky, semi-round with hard erasers. Kakashi's Generation would have circular pencils, with soft erasers- the kind that are seen around now a days.

Naruto's Generation would be split; Kakashi-gen pencils when in the academy, Kakashi-gen pencils with mechanical pencils showing up when they're older.

Time zones:

The way I see it;

Konoha - 10:00  
Suna - 09:00  
Iwa - 09:00  
Kumo - 11:00  
Kiri - 12:00

Timeline:

0 - 400 God Tree Era  
0 - 60 Sage of Six Paths Era  
0 - 1256 Warring States Era  
0 - ? Village System Era

 _\- Each Era restarts at zero at the end of the one before. So the 1st Hokage's reign ends in 1733._

—0 - 17 1st Hokage Reign  
—17 - 38 2nd Hokage Reign  
—38 - 72 3rd Hokage Reign I  
—72 - 75 4th Hokage Reign  
—75 - 88 3rd Hokage Reign II  
—88 - 92 5th Hokage Reign I  
—92 Danzō's Reign  
—92 - ? 5th Hokage Reign II

ANBU Squads:

I think ANBU squads would be on the larger side, that doesn't mean that they would all be on the same mission together all the time. Squads would train together so that they'd be familiar with each other's fighting styles; missions would generally be assigned in teams derived from the squad.

Squads would be made up of one captain and X vice captains who would lead the the teams, the rest would be labeled as Medic, Tracker or Attacker. Like so- ↓

CAPTAIN  
Hatake Kakashi, Inu [Dog]

VICE  
Nara Ensui, Kuma [Bear]  
Mokuton Tenzo, Tora [Tiger]  
Uchiha Itachi, Usagi [Rabbit]

MEDIC  
Oribe Suiki, Nezumi [Rat/Mouse]  
Inuzuka Hana, Haiena [Hyena]  
Yōji Kumadori, Ojika [Stag/Buck]

TRACKER  
Aburame Muta, Inago [Locust/Grasshopper]  
Hyūga Tokuma, Taka [Hawk]  
Yamanaka Santa, Hayabusa [Peregrine Falcon]

ATTACKER  
Uzuki Yūgao, Neko [Cat]  
Namiashi Raidou, Jakkaru [Jackal]  
Shiranui Genma, Kitsune [Fox]

Budget, Kakashi:

Pre-Genin (General Income): 510,000 ryō ($50,000)

Village Cut: [30%] 153,000 ryō ($15,000)  
Food: 1,630 ryō ($160)  
Rent: 19,846 ryō ($1950)  
Pets: 22,390 ryō ($2,200)  
Personal: 10,180 ryō ($1,000)  
Equipment: 300,600 ryō ($26,000)

TOTAL;  
Unused: 2,354 ryō ($2,190)  
Used: 507,646 ryō ($47,810)

 **Notes:** I see the village getting 30% of the income for each mission which covers medical expenses, rent is paid for weekly for active ninja and the majority of money tends to go towards equipment upkeep/replacement.

I think Kakashi would take higher ranking/multiple missions. All the money he spends tends to stay at the same amount except for food- that varies by the amount of free meals he can get (I also follow the belief that ninja eat considerably more than civilians). He also likes spoiling his Ninken.

Chakra, Kra:

Jutsu;

GENERAL:  
E-Rank: 3 Kra  
D-Rank: 10 Kra  
C-Rank: 20 Kra  
B-Rank: 40 Kra  
A-Rank: 80 Kra  
S-Rank: 160 Kra

AFFINITY:  
E-Rank: 5 Kra  
D-Rank: 14 Kra  
C-Rank: 28 Kra  
B-Rank: 56 Kra  
A-Rank: 112 Kra  
S-Rank: 224 Kra

SECONDARY AFFINITY:  
E-Rank: 7 Kra  
D-Rank: 18 Kra  
C-Rank: 36 Kra  
B-Rank: 72 Kra  
A-Rank: 144 Kra  
S-Rank: 288 Kra

NON-ANFINITY:  
E-Rank: 9 Kra  
D-Rank: 24 Kra  
C-Rank: 48 Kra  
B-Rank: 96 Kra  
A-Rank: 192 Kra  
S-Rank: 384 Kra

 **Notes:** When writing, to make sure that characters aren't overpowered with endless chakra, I assign characters a number of how much chakra they have and, with the above, I subtract the chakra used up by jutsu. I designated it as "Kra" for two reasons; A) I didn't want to write out Chakra each time and B) the idea was based off games and their HP/Mana/etc

Also 0.5kra is taken for each second/sentence spent water walking likewise with "tree walking" except for at 0.25kra.

Money:

 **Coins:** 1, 5, 10, 50 ryō  
 **Bills:** 100, 500, 1000, 5000 ryō

Money, Prices- Incomplete:

 **FOOD:**  
 _VEGETABLES;_

Artichoke (250g): 22 ryō  
Basil (bundle): 42 ryō  
Beans (250g): 17 ryō  
Beetroot (bunch): 34 ryō  
Broccoli (1 head): 18 ryō  
Brussel Sprouts (300g): 48 ryō  
Cabbage (1kg): 34 ryō  
Carrots (1): 3 ryō  
Celery (bunch): 42 ryō  
Corn (1 head): 30 ryō  
Cucumber (1): 21 ryō  
Eggplant (1): 12 ryō  
G Onion(6): 18 ryō  
Lettuce(1 head): 25 ryō  
Onion(1): 3 ryō  
Potato (1): 11 ryō  
Tomatoes (6): 51 ryō  
Zucchini(1): 15 ryō

 _FRUIT;_

Orange(1): 4 ryō  
Red Apple(1): 5 ryō  
Strawberry(12): 36 ryō

 _PICKLED/CANNED/MANUFACTURED;_

Black Olives (700g): 41 ryō  
Mayonnaise (860g): 127 ryō  
Pickles (750g): 27 ryō

 _DAIRY/EGGS;_

Butter (500g): 44 ryō  
Cheese (500g): 43 ryō  
Eggs (12): 65 ryō  
Milk (3L): 40 ryō

 _MEAT;_

Beef Ribs (6): 102 ryō  
Beef(500g): 61 ryō  
Pork (500g): 46 ryō

 _GRAIN;_

Wt. Rice(2kg): 42 ryō  
AngHr Noodle (1kg): 31 ryō

 **PETS:**  
 _DOGS;_

Food (15lb bag): 132 ryō  
Bed (small): 60 ryō  
Rope toy: 51 ryō

 **NINJA STUFF:**  
 _GENIN ACCESS;_

Exploding Tag (5): 100 ryō  
Shuriken (12): 60 ryō  
Kunai (10): 50 ryō  
Senbon (24): 85 ryō  
Storage Scroll (1): 375 ryō  
Wireless Radio (1): 500 ryō  
Weapon Holster (1): 150 ryō  
Weapons Pouch (1): 275 ryō  
Smoke Bombs (4): 225 ryō  
Flash Bombs (4): 235 ryō  
Sandals (2): 184 ryō  
Bandages (1 roll): 54 ryō  
Fishnet Shirt (sleeves): 140 ryō  
Fishnet Shirt (sleeveless): 122 ryō  
Fishnet Leggings (1): 140 ryō  
Gloves (Fingerless): 91 ryō  
Arm Guard (1): 318 ryō  
Leggings (1): 346 ryō  
Pants (1): 245 ryō  
Shirt (Sleeves): 448 ryō  
Bra (1): 470 ryō  
Wire (1 yard): 216 ryō

 _CHUNIN ACCESS;  
(OR Genin with their Sensei)_

Chakra Blade: 2,000 ryō  
Tantō: 1,500 ryō  
Katana: 2,500 ryō  
Kusarigama: 5,000 ryō  
Uniform: 1000 ryō  
Travel Pack: 700 ryō  
Storage Scroll: 3500 ryō  
Poison: 900 ryō  
Blood Pill: 360 ryō  
Soldier Pill: 364 ryō  
Food Pill: 300 ryō  
Hydro Pill: 300 ryō  
Canteen: 200 ryō  
Ration Bar: 60 ryō  
Bedroll: 650 ryō

Konbini:

Showed up early 2nd War, became popular midwar. Two kinds, shinobi frequent the Yuurei Konbini; they can buy standard equipment along with premade meals, paying bills, sending post and catching up on important events missed in a swift manner regardless of the time of day. No individual thing costs more than 1,000 ryō.


	46. Fandom Fusions: A Bit More Like

I know everything been Naruto _(Kakashi)_ focused but I _have_ put things on Tumblr that have nothing to do with Naruto. So those that don't have anything to do with Naruto will have be boxed like so [Title].

 **.**

 **[Fandom Fusions: A Bit More Like]**

 **.**

* * *

.

 **Noragami:** _James Potter, Quidditch Player Extraordinaire and God. Sirius Black, newly deceased and James Potter's new regalia. Regulus Black, Sirius' still living brother in denial of Sirius' death._

 **RotG:** _Godric Gryffindor, Guardian of Courage. Rowena Ravenclaw, Guardian of Intelligence. Salazar Slytherin, Guardian of Cunning. Helga Hufflepuff, Guardian of Loyalty._

 **Fairy Tail, Guild:** _Magic is known, wizards have guilds to gather, learn, grow and work. Hogwarts is an odd one, made up of four allied guilds- Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Slytherin and Hufflepuff. Sirius is the first Black to leave Slytherin behind._

 **Avengers:** _Godric Gryffindor, immortal and brother of Salazar Slytherin. Remus Lupin, genius with a furry problem. Sirius Black, billionaire, genius and playboy- creator of R.E.G.U.L.U.S. James Potter, the man outta time. Severus Snape, the spy Salazar took control of. Lily Evans, the best spy in the world._

 **Premium Rush:** _San Fransokyo is a large city, bikers act as carriers. Hiro needed a bit of money, he also knew he could make a bike fast enough to be the best carrier in the city- he really didn't think it'd be so dangerous._


	47. HP: Time Travel - The Veil Leaves None

**[HP: Time Travel - The Veil Leaves None Unchanged]**

 **{Or in Which Sirius Is Broken and has Lost Something He Is Not Entirely Aware Of}**

 **.**

* * *

 _._

Sirius took a moment to silently stared at his old House Head that stood at the doorstep of the hostel he had been staying at. The, now sixteen year old, had known that settling in Britain would attract attention given that he was a Black and had sent a letter as an inquiry to attend Hogwarts, but he hadn't thought that McGonagall would be the one to visit him. Idly he wondered what exactly Dumbledore was occupied with to not investigate a student going by 'Sirius Black'- July 7 wasn't part of the school year after all.

"Would you like to speak with me, ma'am?" He asked.

McGonagall nodded, "Yes Mr. Black," he had to hand it to her, the woman didn't so much as twitch at using the name. "There is a café at the corner that I believe would be suitable for our discussion. I am to understand that you are aware of what I wish to speak to you about?"

"My education being continued at a Scottish boarding school?" Sirius offered, matching the woman's brisk pace.

This earned him a sharp nod, he was content to let the silence remain as they walked, pleased with being able to walk outside freely even after months of doing so. The Deputy Headmistress didn't speak until they were seated, supplied with their orders (green tea and biscuits for her while he had hot chocolate and chocolate donuts, having developed a serious appreciation for chocolate after Azkaban) and under the influence of well played _Muffliato_ and _Notice-Me-Not_ charms.

"Mr. Black, your sudden letter asking to attend, was…unexpected." McGonagall stated. "Especially given-"

"My name and non-first year status?" He supplied, dunking his donut and taking a bite to buy himself time to word his answer. He had planned an answer though not the exact wording so it wouldn't come off as rehearsed. "Alphard Black faked his death during the war," he started easily. "He had became close to a muggleborn witch whom ended up pregnant and decided it was best to leave for the safety of his family. My father, Marius, grew up on stories about grandpa's favorite nephew and decided to name me after him. I'd been home schooled until recently, upon my father's death, and, given that the war was over and there was really nothing keeping me, I decided to see if I could finish my schooling at Hogwarts as my namesake and grandparents did."

The woman looked a bit gob smacked before regaining control of herself, "I…see. Well," she rallied, "You'll have to be tested for your placement given your home schooled status, but we have time for that yet, and you'll have to take your OWLs regardless of where your placed-"

"Can I be placed, assuming I meet the standards, in fifth year so I can adjust to school without worrying about a different schedule for my OWLs?" Sirius asked, wanting to be in Harry's year.

"…I'll have to speak with the Headmaster," McGonagall finally answered, "But I don't see that being a problem. Now, have you been to Diagon Alley, Mr. Black?"

Yes, to get a new wand and to open a muggle bank linked account at Gringotts.

"No, I've heard about it but was never told where it was exactly." He half-lied, his parents never seeing why he'd need to know where it was given they always appeared or flooed.

"It's on Charring Cross Road," she said, conjuring a map and having a red dot 'You are Here' appear on it. "Near Phoenix Street, there's a bus stop a couple meters from it, I'm told. Now, I cannot order you, but I recommend that you rent a room there at the Leaky Cauldron so it'll be easier to reach you when I return with an answer for you. I'll be blunt Mr. Black, do you require financial assistance?"

"No." Not with him nicking a Time-Turner when he first arrived via being barfed up by the Veil and utilizing it to take multiple part-time jobs to save up for Hogwarts- the recklessness and responsibility cancelled each other out as far as he was concerned. "I figured it would be simpler than moving into an apartment and worrying about rent during the school year."

She nodded in acceptance and stood, taking down her spells. "I'll be sure to get back to you within a week, Mr. Black." He absently rubbed his chest as she left, feeling supremely satisfied that his planning had been successful.

Now to see how the Order and his past self reacted to the information and how the Ministry would react when he arrived at the Leaky Cauldron.

 **.:.**

"So," Sirius drawled, eying the people from where he calmly sat, having been eating lunch when interrupted. "Because of my name, I am suddenly capable of hiding a mass murderer- whom I never met before, I might add- with the skill to fool trained Aurors?"

Fudge sputtered but Umbrige retorted immediately, "Black fled abroad after breaking in at Hogwarts, he could have met up with you- where did you say you were from, dear?"

"Canada." He deadpanned, anger tickling him and mildly concerned as he knew that he'd have reacted more before the Veil. "Lovely country, very picturesque."

The woman smiled a faux sweet smile, "Indeed. Now, about your namesake-…"

"I am not hiding him, though I doubt you'll take my word and a truth potion on a minor is illegal." He stated. "However, I am a Black and so have the right to challenge for Lordship, which I'll likely win due to the other's criminal status. Upon becoming Lord Black, I can disown him to keep him from using the family's houses to hide in as a show of my innocence."

And run into the whole 'no trial' issue, hurting the Ministry's image and freeing his future self.

Fudge regained his voice, "I- that would be very helpful, Mr. B-black."

"You can call me Alphard, it's my middle name." Sirius offered taking a drink of his Butterbeer, it was even true now. "Or another version of Sirius, like Sothis or Canicula."

The man tried, and failed, to not be relieved, "Alphard then. Do you have anything else-…"

"We can go now, Minister, I've finished my lunch already." He answered pleasant enough, knowing that he had a time-turner to set things up to go smoothly. And meet with whatever Order member might be looking for him. "Perhaps a brief detour to the Daily Prophet is in order, this is a momentous occasion."

Later, upon being informed his claim would need to be pleased for before the Wizengamot due to his 'cousin' never receiving a trial or being convicted, Sirius will be properly horrified and demand a lawyer for his maltreated namesake.

He will be pleased with July 10 morning's paper proclaiming _'Teenage Immigrant Exposes Ministry Failure of Fourteen Years!'_


	48. HTTYD: Running

**[HTTYD: Running]**

 **.**

* * *

 _._

 _Leaving._ Hiccup told himself firmly, taking sanctuary in his room after offering excuses to his father to get out of the end of training feast _("Aye, I took the time to prepare also son- don't worry, I will explain if they ask."),_ knowing that there was no way he could kill a dragon.

Not after Toothless.

What did he expect though? That he could go on with befriending a dragon while training- while succeeding- to kill dragons with no problems at all? That everything would be okay if _Astrid_ had been chosen? Could he have sat by and done _nothing_ as his crush killed a dragon? Did he believe that, with how 'well' he did in training, he would get away with _not_ killing a dragon during the next raid?

 _No,_ he knew, but-… _I didn't want to think about the consequences of my actions. I never do._

This time…this time though, he had to. It wasn't something that would have him sent to his room without food or cleaning out the hen house for an invention gone wrong. No, this time he was facing becoming an Outcast should he refuse to face the Nightmare, likely death if he did face it and, worse of all, his actions would probably cause Toothless' death.

So, he would leave- still Outcast but at least on his own terms. With a nod to affirm his decision, Hiccup got off his bed and dragged out the basket he had stuffed in a corner after Toothless was capable of catching his own food.

The first thing that went in was the blanket kept under his bed for the colder nights, opened and lining the basket to, hopefully, take up less space then it would have if it had been folded. Next came his books; a cookbook that had belonged to his grandmother, the book of plants and their uses that Fishlegs had given him when they were children, the 'blacksmith map' Bobber had gotten him when he first became the man's apprentice (something his dad insisted on so he'd know what to not touch) and his mother's journal his father had given him when he got old enough to wonder about her. His clothes, all folded and stacked neatly, went on them to offer some protection.

 _What else…_ Hiccup mused, pausing with his basket only barely filled. _Fire starter would be a waste of space with Toothless, so would weapons…but…I don't want to only eat pit-roasted fish. The house's cooking stuff is too big-…hm._

He froze momentarily, peering at his 'treasure' chest before scrambling down in front of it and wrenching it open- revealing all the odd bits he had decided to keep over the years. Pushing his recent schematics out of the way, and tossing out old clothes his dug through eight years worth of junk to get to the very first items he made as Gobber's apprentice; a grill barely bigger then his hand with bars spacers oddly (closely on one side then growing apart as it went), a cauldron that was three sizes too small for a typical viking (but just right for him to carry single-handed even if full) and a pan with sides that were too high along with a handle that curled (he'd thought it would help keep the food from spilling).

Those went in next with a wooden spoon and bowl taken from the kitchen and the sewing kit he had pushed into the miniature cauldron with a couple of rags to keep it from moving about. Throwing in a pillow, a strip of fur (something to lay on wouldn't go amiss) and wooden box (holding a bar of soap, scrub brush and comb) left the basket almost entirely full.

 _Almost._ Hiccup nodded, shouldering the basket straps on to head outside. _But enough to fit leather in case Toothless' tail needs a patch job before we reach Bashem Oiks_. Tucking the basket out of sight in the trees behind the house, he had enough time to almost reach his home before stumbling backwards with an embarrassing squeak of surprised fear when Astrid's axe was put in his path, the girl steaming at it's end.

"Astrid!?" He squeaked, coughing and clearing his throat before trying again. "Uh, hi Astrid. Wh-what are you doing here?…besides, you know, lurking behind my house..?"


	49. Merlin: Not Your Servant

**[Merlin: Not Your Servant]**

 **.**

* * *

 _._

The box was set down with a loud thud that herald the start of a new life for him, or so Merlin liked to think.

The place- his new _home_ \- was wooden building larger than his home in Ealdor and, while not in any way _new,_ was in decent condition and suitable for what he intended to use it for; it was rather wide and somewhat squat with a ladder leading up to a loft that he'd sectioned off for his bedroom, wood dominated the flooring and a wall divided the kitchen from the rest off the main room that was lined with two windows on either side of the door while the doorway to the cellar tucked itself in a corner of the kitchen. It was rather bare of furniture- only a single table, three chairs, bathing tub, chamber pot and wardrobe- but was clean and kitchen stocked along with the cellar, it was in the Lower Town not too far from the tavern _The Rising S_ un so he was rather pleased with his reward for saving Prince Prat.

"Are you sure about this Merlin?" Gaius asked from where he had been inspecting the kitchen.

He shrugged, "I'm a decent cook and with the reward I got it's not like I can't afford opening my own shop." The warlock pointed out, debating on if he wanted to start pulling things out now before deciding it was better to take it to his room before unleashing it's contents.

"Yes, I am aware of that." the old physician sighed, "I don't suppose it would be too much to ask you to stay out of trouble?"

Merlin laughed, "Me? In trouble?" This earned him a deeper sigh and he relented, "I promise not to go out searching for trouble."

The _much_ was left unsaid but evidently not unheard as the older man sent him a vaguely disapproving glare before deciding to let it go, "You are free to visit me, Merlin."

"Don't worry Gaius," He told the man, "I won't leave you all alone and," he tagged on as he felt an odd turning of guilt at abandoning the man after not even a week, "If you get me a list the day before, I don't mind looking for herbs for you in the mornings."

 _That_ got him a smile, "I think I'll take you up on that." Moving towards the still open door, Gaius added before leaving, "Remember, being on your own does not give to permission to be reckless."

Merlin grinned as the door shut, scooping his box up once more before heading up stairs to his loft of a bedroom. His clothes- which was really just one outfit seeing as he wore the other- went into the wardrobe along with the bag he arrived with, a pair of wash clothes and a stretch of cloth for him to dry off with after a bath. He moved the chamber pot to a corner that was hidden from view by the wardrobe and dragged the bathing tub so it was across from the pot before uncurling the bedroll and pillow Gaius had gotten him in congratulations- his spell book hidden inside the pillow, his magic fixing the hole he cut to place it there and making it seem unmarred (and it felt like it was a simple pillow at his mentor's insistence).

He paused a moment but decided that there really wasn't much more to do with the room so left the rest of his things in the box and simply let the box rest near the door before heading downstairs once more. Stumbling to a halt when he arrived and for Prince Prat in the middle of the main room, eying the place with a decidedly snobbish expression that irritated more then a little.

But he _had_ just promised Gaius… "Did you need anything…sire?" He tacked on after a beat.

The blond still snobbish but a bit relieved and, he now realized, a little less awkward turned towards him. "My father rewarded you for your service to his house," The Prince said, drawling and vaguely annoyed, "But I've done nothing to…" Hesitation, distaste and a bit of anger. "…thank you for saving my life."

"…Alright?" Merlin said after a beat where the Prat just _stared_ as if he was suppose to be doing something. "That all?"

The Prat had the gall to roll his eyes, "No, Merlin. That is _not_ all."


	50. HP: Life is a Game

**[HP: Life is a Game]**

 **.**

* * *

 _._

Cedric found himself in a empty room, windows too high up to see anything more than the blue sky and a «Text Box» floating before him that he really aloud, _"Welcome to the tutorial, Player_ **«Cedric Diggory».** _To begin please open the_ «Quest» _portion of your_ «Main Menu» _and choose the quest_ «Getting Started» _. To open_ «Main Menu», _put the tips of your fingers together and place your hand before you then flick your hand wide open."_

The box faded and he did as instructed, earning a white/blue box with black writing titled 'Main Menu'. There were three rows of three that had, in order form top-bottom/left-right, things such as; _«Character» «Messages» «Inventory» «Skills» «Quests» «Pets» «Relationships» «PvP»_ and _«Trade»._ Pushing _«Quests»_ had a grey box appear in front of the _«Main Menu»._

 **Quests:**

 **Getting Started:** _"Learning how things work is important!"_  
 **So You're a Third Year, huh?:** _"Being older then the main character is great, but now you have to catch up!"_  
 **Homefield Explorer:** _"There's an entire world out there, but there's still interesting things to find near home to occupy your summer!"_

 **.**

* * *

\- Everyone magical is a RPG Player; they only think people are NPCs due to different "Player Channels"; Players whom unlock Rebirth before death can become a Magical Race Player (Goblin, Centaur, Feels, etc) on a different channel- each Race needs to be unlocked through Rare Quests [ghosts can happen from Rare Special Quests completed to unlock the race].

\- Channels are done in generations consisting of the students that are at Hogwarts during the 7 years of the "Anchor's" schooling; Anchors tend to be the defendants of the First Four, Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, Slytherin; Known Anchor Families are…Potters, Blacks and Prewett.

\- Harry's Channel consists of -6 to +6 of his first year; Channels can be "bent" by family or friends whom spent enough time together with a relationship of +65 and up.


	51. FT x BH6: Technomage

**[FT x BH6: Technomage]**

 **.**

* * *

 _._

"FOOD!"

The reaction was immediate, an arm was thrown out towards the unknown person rushing him and the lacrima on the back of his hand lit up a white-blue before a concentrated gust of wind was throwing the person back. Beside him, careful of the groceries tied to her, his horse mech stamped a hoof while the leg's plating shuttered open in a few places that allowed steam to whistle out but made no move to attack.

"Ghihihi!" The deep, hoarse laugh drew his attention to a wild-looking black haired teen. "This little brat just knocked you on your ass, Salamander!"

Steam came through Hydro's nose-holes with a sound like a snort before she spoke. **"Confusion. Inquiry: New Units?"**

"Woah!" The person he'd hit before was suddenly there, looking at Hydro with wide-eyes. "Your horse talks!? Think it's something like you, Happy?"

The blue cat next to the teen said in lieu of an answer, "It speaks weird."

 **"Offense."** Hydro snorted out more steam as her head bent to look at the cat with brilliant, dark blue eyes. **"Inorganic Unit Horse: Designation _Hydro_ Contains Optimal Audio Programing With Corresponding Vocal Processors. Organic Unit FELINE : Designation UNKNOWN Contains Suboptimal Audio Programing Alongside Disgraceful Vocal Processors."**

Hiro let out a fondly amused huff when the cat and teen made identical confused noises. "'Inorganic Unit Horse: Designation Hydro' is how she refers to herself; 'inorganic unit horse' because she was created to look like a horse instead of living one and 'designation Hydro' because I named her Hydro. So she called you an 'organic unit feline: designation unknown' because you're a living cat whose name she doesn't know." He explained, patting the mech's neck plating. "Basically she was offended that you said she spoke weird and said that you're the one who speaks oddly."

 **"Affirmative. Agreement With** _ **Creator**_ **."** Hydro snorted, neck plating shuddering softly under his hand in affection. **"Repeated Inquiry. New Inquiry: Designations Obtainable?"**

"Who are you?" Hiro asked, offering the teen a hand. "And, um, sorry for earlier."


	52. Merlin: Based on One Piece

**[Merlin: Based on One Piece]**

 **.**

* * *

 _._

"This," Arthur huffed in irritation exhaustion as the two of them slid to hide behind a group of crates, "Is your fault, _sorcerer."_

Merlin glared at the other until the navy ran past and he regained enough breath to speak, "Oh no, don't you dare blame this mess on me! _Mr. My Pride Says I Must Challenge Your Leader_!" He took a deep breath then added, "And I am not a sorcerer you, dollophead! I am a **Warlock**!"

"What's the difference?" The bounty hunter scoffed, standing and dragging the disgruntled magic user with him.

Shoving the blonde away, Merlin shot back testily as he started off in the opposite direction that the navy soldiers had ran. "What's the difference between a swordsman and a man flailing about with a sword?"

"So you're a flailing magic user?" Arthur asked with false thoughtfulness.

The warlock let out a wordless snarl, fingertips sparking in anger before dissipating with a harsh laugh when the blond went for his sword. "Oh don't act like I'm going to kill you."

 _"Merlin didn't exactly have many options in life being a born magic user, traveling the sea was simply a way to make a living for himself and enjoy his freedom while he still had it. Arthur had always thought that the law was right, that the military was an honorable thing- he became a bounty hunter when he learned of the corruption in it's ranks._

 _Neither planned on becoming pirates but, then, when do things go as planned?"_


	53. Confessions

**Confessions**

 **.**

* * *

.

One:

I always wished that chakra would have lead to some mutations in animals (more then just ninja partners/summons)- it would be awesome if Suna was surrounded by giant, monstrous sandworms.

Two:

I really want to see an Broken/Evil Kakashi- one that is not a "swap" with Obito/Tobi.

Three:

My journey into fandoms and fanfiction started with SasuNaru; I remember looking up something and accidentally clicking a link to a story then reading the first couple of chapters thinking _"This is really a thing?"_ Of course then I realized that it was more then just that pairing/fandom and immediately went to investigate _Yu Yu Hakusho, Final Fantasy 7, The Legend of Zelda_ and _Harry Potter._

Then I saw _Kakashi Gaiden_ , fell in love with Kakashi (and Sakumo _{won't even pretend to understand why}_ ) and returned to the fandom (though not SasuNaru because I really don't like Sasuke that much- I am of the opinion that Sai is better).

Four:

The Naruto movies…I kind of wished that, instead of staying with Naruto, the movies were used to explore other characters…like maybe the pre-Shippuden would be of the other Konoha 12?

The last pre-Shippuden one could have been of Gaara working to become Kazekage. The first two Shippuden ones could have been of Sai and Yamato/Tenzo's backgrounds…and then one with Sakura- but not Sasuke since I am pretty sure the anime followed him a bit in Shippuden- now that she's hm….And one of Kakashi, I prefer if he were the one to travel into the past, since we have Kakashi Gaiden and a bit his ANBU days.

Five:

I really just want an asexual sociopathic Kakashi. Is that too much to ask?

Six:

For me the series ended after Naruto said his goodbye to Minato when all the Hokages were returning/re-dying/moving on. I know there's more, I also have an idea of what happens after but I personally don't see it as "canon".


	54. Snippets 4

**Snippets 4**

 **.**

* * *

.

Exile:

"I'll write." Tōsan promised.

Kakashi said nothing.

"I love you." Tōsan waited a beat to see if he'd reply before standing with a sigh, turning his attention to Sensei. "Watch out for him?"

A hand curled over his shoulder and Sensei answered solemnly, "I promise, Hatake-san."

His father nodded, glanced at him once more before turning so his back was to them and started walking away from the gates. There was a still silence as the man's back got smaller the further he walked before the crowd roared their approval over the White Fang's exile.

Kakashi's hands curled into fists, felt Sensei's hand tighten on his shoulder, and finally found the words he couldn't earlier- speaking them even if they were to be lost in the sound of the crowd.

"I love you too, Tōsan."

.

I love Speeches:

"Because, whatever they say, I know who I am and I refuse to allow them to turn me into a monster. You have given those who hate you the satisfaction of making you unkind, Gaara-kun, and have thus proved them right in their opinions….but, you must remember, it is never too late to change. Can you? Are you strong enough to forgive their actions, to bare their hate so that you may care for them?"

.

TTtdDTE:

His family often called him paranoid, well, more accurately they called him 'a paranoid, idiotic, no-good failure' but paraphrasing was always the best option when dealing with his family. Regardless, they called him paranoid but, seeing how their clan leader had decided to live a life of isolation with defenses up to and including a _piranha-infested moat_ , Obito decided it was best to ignore their opinions at large.

Uchiha Obito was not paranoid, he was merely excessively prepared for worse case scenarios.

.

Zelda-based:

"A nightmare." Minato murmured, letting out a deep sigh before he sat up and froze.

"Or vision," the fairy- or maybe not seeing as it had feathery wings and a tail of all things. It hummed, tail- an odd cross of canine and feline- flicking in something that might have been amusement before curling in close to the- body, being absorbed into the ball of light. "Never heard of a fairy tail before?"

He paused then said, "I've heard of fairy tales not a fairy with a tail…or bird wings."

.

White Dog, Black Crow:

"Hm." Kakashi hummed through a mouthful of Miso, uncovered eye trained on the man who brought it to him for lunch. It had eggplants in it, his favorite. "What exactly are you bribing me for, Sensei?"

The blonde laughed nervously, "W-what makes you think I'm trying to bribe you?"

He gave a flat look, "You only ever get me my favorites if you want me to do something. Otherwise we have taken."

"I don't always-…" The weak protest died with a glare and a sigh. "Alright. I do."

Kakashi took another mouthful, even if it was bribery, it was still his favorite food. "It must be something you know that I won't like, you're stalling. You did the same when you took on Rin and Obito as students." He added, forestalling any protests then paused and thought. "The only thing that it could be is Naruto…you don't want me to be there?"

"No." Sensei sighed, rubbing his face. "It is potentially dangerous."

The 'I don't want to risk losing another student' was implied but Kakashi was stubborn, "Do you not have a plan?"

"…the Death God Seal." The man answered, correctly guessing that he meant 'If things go wrong'.

Another mouthful. "Hm. Can I send a Kage Bunshin?"

That earned him a thoughtful pause, "Before I leave, go to the bathroom and make one to go with me- you cannot be seen."

"There's a window and I can be Karasu." He answered readily, it may be a bit of a irritation to color his hair black but it wasn't difficult. He took a moment to wonder if anyone else had two ANBU masks or if it was just him, White Dog and Black Crow.


	55. A Tale of Two Demons

**A Tale of Two Demons**

 **.**

* * *

.

Kakashi narrowed his eyes as he watched the Kyuubi rampage through the village, paying special attention to the kitsune's eyes and what he could _:feel:_ from the infamous demon fox. There was hatred there, so much that it was almost all consuming, and ** _:pain:_** so piercing that Kakashi nearly winced- the later seeming to act as a fuel towards the former. There was, however, something else something that did not belong to the yōko that was guiding the demon, edging it on towards destroying the village.

That did not mean that, given the chance, the fox wouldn't attempt to destroy the village- no, the kitsune hated Konohagakure far too much from it's imprisonment and it was radiated ** _:will not be trapped!:_** almost as loudly as ** _:hate! Kill-you worms!:_**. It did, however, mean that it wouldn't have been attacking as it was, as the yōko was intelligent enough to know that the village, having already housed the biju for decades, would have a way to contain it and would have placed it's own freedom over it's hate.

Meaning, if not for the other forcing the Kyuubi to attack, the fox would have been long gone by now- seeking it's freedom where humans wouldn't find it to seal it away once more.

He glanced at those around him- teens of sixteen and younger watching the destruction and death, wishing to fight for their home but ordered not to so as to preserve the future of the village- and smelt their fear and worry and helplessness that nearly drowned out their hope which withered more the longer the rampage continued.

They did not think they would live, nor that their loved ones- many whom were fighting already- would survive.

And suddenly he was moving in a way that he hadn't- not here because it wasn't _safe_ \- since Hatake Sakumo's death, racing towards the Kyuubi because this was his home and he'd be damned if he'd let a fox destroy it. Let a fox kill his packmates- even if the yōko was kin in a way that human's were not.

Dogs, demon or not, tended to be loyal after all.

At the speed he was going, it did not take long to reach the enraged demon but he did not approach immediately. Instead waiting until he :felt: the other's control slip from the yōko, broadcasting _:Kin:_ to make the fox pause and listen, as he said, "I had always believed that kitsune were cunning."

The Kyuubi growled, **"You have no idea of my cunning, worm."** even as it sent, **_:Kin- how?:_**

"Perhaps." He allowed, replying with :Not-human, not-animal. Both and more.: "You are certainly not advocating it at the moment- attacking a village that you know has a way to seal you away rather then leaving to claim your freedom."

A snarl accompanied by narrowed eyes, **"Is that a threat?"**

 ** _:Will not be caged!:_** roared from the fox as it's rage and bloodlust spiked.

"This mutt would presume to threaten a kitsune whose power is so great that it claimsnine tails." His retort was dry, sarcastic and full of promise as he continued. "I am merely pointing out some things you seem to have over looked."

He added non-verbally as he grinned, wide and feral beneath his mask with bloodlust that he rarely allowed himself to even think about let alone feel these days, _:You attacked mine- my territory, my pack, my humans- kitsune. Leave now. For, if I do not kill you, I will make certain freedom will be nothing but a memory to you.:_

 **"Tch."** the Kyuubi snorted, but logic made it's way through anger and caution overunknown threat made it decide to retreat while able. But, even as it gathered energy to simply leave, it sent, **_:You are no human.:_**

Kakashi allowed himself to send a taunt of _**:Hurry little fox, sealer comes:**_ as he felt his sensei's approach before answering the unasked question just as the kitsune, already half snarling from his taunt, disappeared- letting it feel his dark amusement as he did so.

 _:Little fox, you are not the only one whom enjoys tricks. What grander trick then to convince demon haters that I am one of them?:_

By the time Namikaze Minato touched down beside him, the Kyuubi was gone


	56. Final Battle

**Final Battle**

 **.**

* * *

.

 _"Kakashi!"_ Sensei shouted.

Naruto's came almost immediately after, _" **Kakashi-sensei!** "_

The hairs on the back of his neck prickled as they tended to when he was in danger and Kakashi just knew but he didn't move nor make any attempts to protect himself- he kept his eyes trained on the body beneath him.

 _Obito._

.

Sakumo tossed his opponent aside as Minato shouted his son's name, he was running already when Minato's son called out to his son in warning. His chakra was rising preparation for a jutsu before he even knew what exactly was threatening his son, hands flying through seals for the most useful jutsu in his arsenal.

Not protecting his son never even crossed his, even when he stepping between his son and saw that the threat was a Juubi-powered Bijūdama.

He failed Kakashi as a father once already, he refused to do so a second time.

.

"Tōsan." the word came out like a breath as he stared.

His father's back was to him, hands firmly on the electric barrier keeping the Bijūdama at bay but, even as he watched, the man was turning towards him- one hand moving from the barrier to be placed into the open air between them. A spark and Tōsan grunted before a second barrier was placed- this time excluding Tōsan. A second Bijūdama was being formed as Tōsan placed his back to the first barrier to press both his hands on the second.

Kakashi's mind finally caught up with him, with the implications. _"No…"_

And Tōsan, Tōsan was smiling at him in a way that made him ache and force himself to remember Rule 25 _(A shinobi must never show their tears.)._ "Kakashi."

He almost couldn't stop his flinch because that sounded like a goodbye. "Tōsan, no…"

"I am so proud of the man you've become and am glad that I had the chance to see it."

He flinched this time and wanted to shout _'You can't leave me! Not again! Not when I just got you back!'_ and, if it would help, would have begged _'Please Tōsan, don't leave me. I love you. I **need** you. _**Please** _.'_ but the words were stuck as he stared with wide eyes.

There were tears as the smile grew sadder- as if Tōsan knew what he wanted to say. "I love you, Kakashi. _Always_."

The second Bijūdama hit then, the first barrier resisting for a moment before buckling, and Kakashi screamed as he lost his father for the second time (as he broke Rule 25). " ** _Tōsan!_** "


	57. Snippets 5

**Snippets 5**

 **.**

* * *

.

Round Two:

Dying as Sirius was similar to dying as just plain Kakashi; deadly attacks flew everywhere- the chaos like panicking civilians during an invasion- in ironically bright colors, the air was filled with a symphony of sound- from explosions and collapsing buildings to pained screaming and grim shouts- that he occasionally added to with irritated cursing and the whole place stank- of burning flesh and _too much blood_ , of heat bloating corpses and dead bodies made to decay faster- something terrible.

When Kakashi died, he had been alone and it had been something of suicide in order to protect another.

When _Sirius_ had died, it had also been something of suicide but he _hadn't_ been alone.

 **The second time he died, it started a bit like this;**

Hospitals were safe, this was something that was a deep-seated belief despite the war that it was almost a kind of rule of life- no matter what horrors Voldemort may bring, hospitals were safe. It is why, when the rumor came, so few believed that Voldemort would actually attack St. Mungo's- certainly the Ministry didn't put much stock into it, assigning only a team of five Aurors as protection.

 _(It should be known that he hadn't even been assigned there, that he had actually been on something of a vacation at the time.)_

While some followed the Ministry's example, there were those who decided it was better to err on the side of caution- they took to only going to St. Mungo's when absolutely necessary and doing so in groups of able-bodied wizards.

He had been present because Lily Potter had gone into labor and James Potter had rallied everyone he was even remotely friendly with and were competent with their wand. He might not have been as close to the man as he might have been if he'd been sorted into Gryffindor but he was considered a Marauder if only because of his contribution in becoming Animagus.

Lily had been close- no more then an hour- away from being able to start pushing when the first explosion rocked the hospital.

For a moment everyone had froze, then planning (dubbed paranoid by an irritable Lily) kicked in and everyone dispersed. James took his spot as a guard to the actual delivery room, Frank Longbottom and Remus Lupin watching the hallways leading to the room while almost everyone else raced towards where the attack was taking place.

Peter Pettigrew was in charge of making sure the staff started evacuating people.

Sight:

Kakashi could not see.

Before capture he had been able to work through exhaustion to carve, to mutilate his Sharingan beyond use-

Because fuck if he would let them get _Obito's eye_. Because he'd already given the seals, Hyūga-based and designed by both Sensei and Kushina, he carried with him for such an occasion to Itachi and Shisui. Because he was only carrying two seals since Shisui's addition was a last-minute thing and at least he'd still have a usable eye if it came down to it instead of the Uchiha.

-and their captors had been _furious_ , enough to take his other eye as compensation even if they'd decided to keep him alive.

Ghost:

When he woke up for the very first time, there was a girl waiting next to him- she would have probably been considered 'cute' or even 'pretty' if not for the gapping hole she had in her chest- and the very first thing she said was, "I forgive you."

"...for what?" he asked after a moment, adding, "Who are you?"

The (dead?) girl looked a little heartbroken and he wondered at the odd pang of guilt even as she managed a smile. "You'll understand when you need to. Come on, we're going to be late."

 _Late,_ he wondered even as he followed her (part of him felt he should be shocked with how quickly they arrived at the large, forest encircled village), _late for what?_

He didn't feel like he had any real _need_ to _be_ anywhere.

It was a funeral they went to, it was a modest one with few people- a blonde man looking exhausted, a grim red-haired woman, a black-haired teen in vibrant green who was sobbing, a tearful brunet woman and a pair of teenagers who seemed to be dating with how the girl clutched the boy- and it looked as if they were only burying a jar.

It was a very nice jar, looked like it was made of a white gold-tinged porcelain that had a bird design on it done in a deep purple, but a jar nonetheless.

The girl-who-was-almost-definitely-dead shed tears as she watched them bury the jar, full out sobbing when the people started placing vases of flowers (some white, some purple, a few red, a pair of yellows but mostly light blue) but she turned to him as they started lighting incense. " _I forgive you_." She repeated with a sincere kind of emphasis, "We will meet again. You better remember me then."

And then she was gone, leaving him with grieving people who couldn't see him.


	58. The Missing

**The Missing**

 **.**

* * *

.

 _Something's missing,_ He decided.

He didn't know what it was, didn't even understand how he could tell, but he just _knew_ something- something important, something _vital-_ wasn't here.

The _missing_ was an ache, a hollow feeling in his gut that was almost but not quiet hunger, and it grew each day since he first acknowledged it- he lasted almost a month before he left home in search of it.

.

"Get back here!"

The angry shout drew his attention but it wasn't until he heard a boy (black-haired, dark-eyed and his according to the ache) call back a "No way!" that he understood what was going on.

The kid was stealing from a food vendor.

He was standing and making his way over by the time the boy found himself caught, a pair of passersby (one with a rather large dog) having helped the vendor corner the slippery boy. "Caught you now!"

"Leggo!" the kid growled, stilling when the dog growled in response.

The vendor, vicious and gleeful in triumph, reclaimed the wrapped morsel, speaking as he reached the group. "Do you know the punishment for thieves, boy?"

"Now," He said, hands in his pockets. "There's no need to take such dramatic measures."

The vendor growled, "This boy's trying to take my livelihood!"

"You got it back, no harm done." He replied easily, arm wrapping around the (now pale) kid's shoulders causally- incidentally pulling the black-hair away from the group and closer to him. "Look at him, he's just a kid."

The vendor was unimpressed, "A thief's a thief no matter the age."

"True enough," he said, hands coming up as placation for a moment before he was flicking a smoke bomb towards them. "Come on." He ordered the boy, starting off at a run.

"What's you're name!?" the kid yelled at him.

He laughed in disbelief when he saw the boy managed to nab the food back from the vendor, "Minato! Namikaze Minato!"


	59. Summer

**Summer**

 **.**

* * *

.

 _The way back home is long,_

.

It's Monday, the second day into October and Hatake Kakashi is late.

For Namikaze Minato, this barely even registers- his mind is filled with thoughts of finishing his paperwork early in hopes of having lunch with his pregnant wife. Nearing noon, his finished papers stacked neatly for a chunin to take away, he catches sight of his calendar and his mind goes to his late student again but it's a thought process that's discarded quickly.

Kakashi tended to loiter outside the village for up to three day during non-urgent missions; wandering anywhere from rural towns, the capital city, civilian tourist attractions, festivals that captured his interest (it had taken Jiraiya dragging the teen back when the Hatake came across a festival dedicated to eggplants of all things) to just plain, untamed wilderness that gave even shinobi pause.

Sometimes, more often then not, the teen will return with some kind of souvenir accompanied by a note of interest;

A farmer's scythe, handle broken but blade well taken care of, is displayed with _"You know, Tosan initially named me Kama? By the time he got around to registering me as a citizen, he changed it to Kakashi since I had gotten into the habit of scaring birds- screaming at them, throwing things or chasing them once I learned to move."_

A golden dragon seal is presented with a bit of bemusement, _"I met the Daimyo's son. Some_...things _... happened. I think Hoshi-kun gave this to me as a sign of friendship. I-...odds are that Hoshi-kun stole it. Do I give it back?"_

A dark blue fan made of razor-sharp metal that somehow looks like silk is prostrated with pride, _"Girls are terrifying. I saw one use one of these to cut a kunai in half. Another_ cut off _a pervert's_ hand- _it went through_ everything _. It was so_ smooth _, there wasn't even a spray of blood- it was **beautiful**."_

A mask that might have been ANBU if not for the bright colors and feathers is shown with an odd mix of glee and confusion, _"There's a festival dedicated to_ **ANBU!** _Apparently we're lesser yōkai bound to serve the Hokage, a kami in mortal skin. There was a_ sacrifice _."_

A blood-crusted claw larger then a hand was produced with awe, _"I don't know what they were. I barely even_ saw _them. They're taller then me. As fast as me. Stood upright. They're pack hunters- they **hunted** me. If not for my nose, I'd be dead- they're used to hunting humans, even_ ** _shinobi_** _."_

October 2, Hatake Kakashi was late but Minato put it out of his mind.

* * *

 **Guest: _I'm rewriting everything, Fox &Hound is going first. You asked about Every Step, you can still read it on my AO3 account [_Nyodrite _also] at_ ao3. or (g) (slash) works (slash) 24 75 52 1 (slash) chapters (slash) 54 91 25 6**


	60. Aburame Shion

**Aburame Shion**

 **.**

* * *

 _Being an Aburame,_ Kakashi now Shion mused, smile quirking when his kikaichū formed a Henohenomoheji in front of him. _Is kind of interesting._

Of course it had been disconcerting, bordering on a horrified terror, to go through the process of becoming a host for his kikaichū after having experiencing his birth- not to mention the fact that he still recalled his death.

 _:Regret-sorrow.:_ his kikaichū, whom had always tried to make him happy since they've settled into his body, projected as they scuttled back up his sleeves in a way that reminded him vaguely of a scolded pup. _:Not intent.:_

"I know," he murmured, more from habit then need. Shibi looked at him, kikaichū buzzing with concerned confusion and he added, "It's alright."

It was odd, being older then Aburame Shibi and having a sibling, but it wasn't bad. He was immensely relieved that the Aburame were relaxed enough that he'd been allowed to secede his right as heir to Shibi despite being a year older- Kakashi had _no idea_ how to lead a clan and Shibi had been a good Clan Head.

"Aburame Shion-" Caught his attention and he looked at the chūnin reading out class assignments, listening for who else was in his class. Of the ones he knew, there was Minato-sensei, Shikamaru's mother, Hinata's father and- "-Uchiha Mikoto will be in Class E under Umino Manami!"

It was... _weird_ , looking at their sensei- it was like a genderbent Umino Iruka without the iconic scar. A large part of him wanted to take a picture and show it to Naruto just to see the blonde's reaction.

The morning went swiftly and it wasn't until he'd manage to corner Minato-sensei at lunch that he really focused on what was going on. "Hokage." Kakashi smirked when his child Sensei whirled around surprise, kikaichū shuddering their wings in amusement. "That's a big dream."

The little Minato looked a bit mulish and defensive. "And? I can do it."

"Hm. Konohagakure has a lot of clans, if you can get at least five heirs to work together before graduation," He told the blond. "Then you have my vote. Think of it as Hokage training."

The blond looked wary but thoughtful. "What do you mean by 'working together'?"

"Get them all to perform tasks together." Kakashi said. "From something as simple as studying together and getting no lower then a 95 on an exam to something like requesting a mission"

Blue eyes narrowed. "Anything else?"

"You can't ask who the heirs are, that's something you have to find out. Until you gathered all of them, you cannot tell them about this- it's your job to convince them. You can only ask for a 'mission' when you gathered two others." He told the seven year old. "I will be your ally but I will only do exactly what you tell me, nothing more."

A pause then- "Alright. I'll do it."

* * *

 **Or what happens when TimeTravel and SI/OC stories breed. I'm doing a few of these (13 in total) and everything (except where in Naruto get's a sibling because I don't think it'd work anyway _but_ with a twin) is randomized from age, birthday, main weapon, elemental affinity, where in the timeline Kakashi comes from along with whether or not he gets a summon (and which summon exactly). So like;**

 **Aburame** **Shion:** ** _  
Timeline: Rescuing Gaara  
Birthday: May 7  
Age: 26 years older then Naruto_**


	61. Uchiha Ryu

**Uchiha Ryu**

 **.**

* * *

"Hold our otouto." Uchiha Ryu, once Hatake Kakashi, told his brother as he offered the six year old the crying baby.

As gently as he held the baby, Itachi clutched the blanket Sasuke was wrapped in like a lifeline. "Okaasan and Otousan are out there."

"It's alright to worry." He told the boy though he was only partially paying attention when his mind was flitting to his first time experiencing the Kyuubi Attack along with keeping track of the Kyuubi and their family forming a line of defense for the compound _and_ watching for Gamabunta. "There's no shame in being afraid."

The Kyuubi, he recalled, appeared near 8:00 and wasn't sealed until some time after 11:00. Around 8:30 it came near Ichiraku and that had been when he'd been stuck behind a barrier with the rest of his age mates. It shot a Bijūdama toward the Hokage Mountain, was rather close to said mountain, around 9:30 and it started to leave through the east side the village around 10:40.

Itachi had once said, when a curious Tenzo had asked about the Attack, that three stray tails had crashed into the Uchiha compound at 8:50/9:00 which had sent him (and a few others) evacuating to a shelter in the south-east. Of course when they'd gotten near the shelter, the Kyuubi came crashing back again causing them to scatter- Itachi had taken Sasuke and bolted into the chaos of the village to search for his parents then, finding his mother a bit past 10:00 escorting civilians to an underground shelter.

It was 8:25. And he had a responsibility as Clan Heir to keep as many Uchiha alive as possible.

 _Right._ Ryu sighed then stood with a quiet "Wait here" as he went into the house. The go-kit, oddly enough dubbed a 'bug-out bag' by civilians, was under the kitchen sink and the compound evac key was hanging in the main room but Sasuke's sling carrier was all the way in their parents bedroom.

He snapped the key's top point as he exited the house, handing over the sling as the siren-announcement sounded, **"Compound-wide Evacuation has been issued, please exit the compound in an orderly fashion at the northern exits. Compound-wide Evacua-"**

"WE'RE LEAVING!?" Itachi shouted to be heard over the voice calling for evacuation even as the six year old neatly tied off the sling while he tucked the key away and secured the go-kit.

Ryu tugged at the sling to make sure it, and Sasuke, were secured before answering, taking his once-kohai's hand as he led them north. "WE'LL ALL BE SAFER IN THE SHELTERS TO THE NORTH!" He called to his brother, speed at a 'breakneck run' for a civilian.

Shisui, a bit wide-eyed and carrying a child no older then four on his back, fell in step with him as they turned left onto the compound's main northern road, civilians pouring from the shops and houses to join them on their way. "I THOUGHT FUGAKU-SAMA SAID TO STAY PUT!"

"KYUUBI IS MAKING IT'S WAY SOUTH," He shouted to his friend. "TOWARDS THE HOKAGE MOUNTAIN!" When they made it to the north gate, Ryu snapped back the key point so the siren-announcement went silent.

 _8:36._ He could do this.

"The Kyuubi is heading south, we're going north to the Burrow Shelter." He told them, voice echoing in the silence that came when the siren ended. "We're taking the tunnels-" he said, speaking over the series of disgusted protests that came- mainly from the preteen females. "So anyone shorter then Itachi will be carried. Those of us walking will form a chain- _yes we will be holding hands_ -" he emphasized in the same tone he'd gotten his squabbling genin to obey. "-I will not lose anyone down there."

"Yakumi-san and Naori-san will be leading us," He announced, making the recently promoted chūnin stand at attention. "Yashiro-san, Naka-san take the rear." Uchiha Naka was also a recent promotion but Uchiha Yashiro was a Jōnin on medical leave due to a broken arm and dislocated shoulder.

He felt a bit smug when 9:00 found them entering the large underground shelter affectionately referred to as the 'Burrow'.

* * *

 **TimeTravel and SI/OC child No. 2.**

 **Uchiha Ryu:** ** _  
Timeline: Time Skip  
Birthday: May 1  
Age: 8 years older then Naruto_**


	62. Headcanons, Money

**Headcanons, Money**

 **.**

* * *

 _ **Money:** _

_Coins: 1, 5, 10, 50 ryō_  
 _Bills:100, 500, 1000, 5000 ryō_

.

 _Budget, Kakashi: _

_Pre-Genin (General Income): 510,000 ryō ($50,000)_

 _Village Cut [30%]: 153,000 ryō ($15,000)_  
 _Food: 1,630 ryō ($160)_  
 _Rent: 19,846 ryō ($1950)_  
 _Pets: 22,390 ryō ($2,200)_  
 _Personal: 10,180 ryō ($1,000)_  
 _Equipment: 300,600 ryō ($26,000)_

 _TOTAL;_  
 _Unused: 2,354 ryō ($2,190)_  
 _Used: 507,646 ryō ($47,810)_

Budget, Kakashi with Genin:

Jōnin Leave: 100,000 ryō ($9,434)  
Sensei Cut [20%]: 50,000 ryō ($4,717)  
Mission Pay: 50,000 ryō ($4717)

Village Cut [30%]: 30,000 ryō ($2,830)  
Food: 1,630 ryō ($160)  
Rent: 19,846 ryō ($1950)  
Pets: 10,000 ryō ($943)  
Personal: 5,000 ryō ($471)  
Equipment: 132,623 ryō ($12,512)

TOTAL;  
Unused: 24 ryō ($2)  
Used: 199,976 ryō ($18,866)

 **Notes:** Done under the assumption that they did 5 High Paying D-Ranks (50,000 ryō/500,000 yen/$4,717 each). All Jōnin-sensei get a blanket 100,000 ryō pay for taking on genin, they also get a 20% 'sensei' cut plus a 4th of the mission pay. Meaning that genin get a fourth of 50% of the pay (lowest pay is about $58.96, which is why they go through a lot of D-Ranks). Village tax doesn't touch "Jōnin Leave".

As for Kakashi...rent and food costs the same as pre-genin. He still spoils his ninken, though not as much. Also, his _Icha Icha_ budget took a hit. And his nin-equipment budget was cut by more then half for two reasons; 1) the missions he {supposed to} goes on with genin doesn't require much equipment upkeep/replacement and 2) he can "borrow" supplies from village {something also covered by village tax}.

.

Groceries, Kakashi:  
_Food Budget: 1,630 ryō_

2 Milk (3L): 80 ryō  
2 Eggs (12): 130 ryō  
5 Wt. Rice (2kg): 210 ryō  
4 Beef Ribs (6): 408 ryō  
Beef (500g): 61 ryō  
2 Pork (500g): 92 ryō  
Butter (500g): 44 ryō  
Cheese (500g): 43 ryō  
24 Carrot (1): 72 ryō  
5 Eggplant (1): 60 ryō  
Strawberry (12): 36 ryō  
5 Orange (1): 20 ryō  
4 Red Apple (1): 20 ryō  
2 G. Onion (6): 36 ryō  
6 Onion (1): 18 ryō  
Celery (bunch): 42 ryō  
3 Cucumber (1): 63 ryō  
Lettuce (1 head): 25 ryō  
Cabbage (1kg): 34 ryō  
2 Corn (1): 60 ryō  
3 Broccoli (1 head): 54 ryō  
2 Potato (1): 22 ryō

.

Genin Pay:

D-RANKs;  
Lowest Pay: 625 ryō ($58.96)  
Highest Pay: 7,000 ryō ($660.39)

C-RANKs;  
Lowest Pay: 1,800 ryō ($169.82)  
Highest Pay: 28,500 ryō ($2,688.25)

 **Notes:** The pay already has both village tax and sensei cut taken out from it along with being divided between all team members (yes, it includes the sensei). For anyone curious on the equation I use for this it's; _{(Mission Reward - [Mission Reward x 0.20])/4} x 0.30 = Genin Pay_

 _._

Chūnin Pay:

C-RANKs;  
Lowest Pay: 2,250 ryō ($212)  
Highest Pay: 7,500 ryō ($708)

B-RANKs;  
Lowest Pay: 11,250 ryō ($1,062)  
Highest Pay: 15,000 ryō ($1,416)

 **Notes:** The pay already has village tax taken out along with being divided between the team (under the assumption that there are 4 team members in total). The equation is; _(Mission Reward/4) x 0.30 = Chūnin Pay_

 _._

T. Jōnin Pay:

B-RANKs;  
Lowest Pay: 11,250 ryō ($1,062)  
Highest Pay: 15,000 ryō ($1,416)

A-RANKs;  
Lowest Pay: 11,250 ryō ($1,062)  
Highest Pay: 75,000 ryō ($7,083)

 **Notes:** The pay already has village tax taken out along with being divided between the team (under the assumption that there are 4 team members in total). The equation is; _(Mission Reward/4) x 0.30 = T. Jōnin Pay_

 _._

Jōnin Pay:

A-RANKs;  
Lowest Pay: 11,250 ryō ($1,062)  
Highest Pay: 75,000 ryō ($7,083)

S-RANKs;  
Lowest Pay: 75,000 ryō ($7,083)

 **Notes:** The pay already has village tax taken out along with being divided between the team (under the assumption that there are 4 team members in total). The equation is; _(Mission Reward/4) x 0.30 = Jōnin Pay_

 _._

Go-Kit, Standard:

4 Storage Scroll (Chūnin): 14,000 ryō  
1 Medkit (Standard): 2,250 ryō  
12 Kunai (10): 600 ryō  
12 Shuriken (12): 720 ryō  
6 Explosive Tags (5): 600 ryō  
6 Smoke Bombs (4): 1,350 ryō  
6 Flash Bombs (4): 1,410 ryō  
6 Wire (1 yard): 1,296 ryō  
6 Weapon Holster (1): 900 ryō  
6 Weapon Pouch (1): 1,650 ryō  
54 Ration Bars: 3,240 ryō  
9 Canteen: 1,800 ryō  
6 Bedrolls: 3,900 ryō  
6 Pants (1): 1,470 ryō  
6 Shirt (Sleeves): 2,688 ryō  
6 Sandal (2): 1,104 ryō  
2 Soap (bar): 16 ryō

TOTAL: 38,994 ryō ($3,681)

 **Notes:** One and a half canteens hold enough water for three days, go-kits Standard Go-kits are packed on the assumption that there will be 6 people with you.  
 _ **\- Fun Fact:**_ _Go-Kits are also referred to as an "SS Meek"; 'SS' for storage scroll and 'Meek' from MEEC which stands for Medkit, Equipment, Eats and Camp._

* * *

 **I really think about these things too much. I will (maybe) figure out the village tax (of what it covers beyond free medical treatment) eventually.**


	63. The Kokujin Brothers

**The Kokujin Brothers**

 **.**

* * *

.

"Raiton! Eight o'clock." Kakashi called, tightening his grip onto the harness as he did so. "Katon! Seven-forty!"

The male golden eagle pulled its wings in to do a roll that had the two jutsu passing harmlessly over curled talons before spreading its wings again once right side up again. "I see Hayai. Meet in two."

Kakashi patted the giant bird even as he kept his focus on the Konoha shinobi chasing them.

 _Really,_ he thought a bit wryly, _I get myself into the oddest situations. First with being reincarnated as a wizard in a completely different world then reincarnated back into my original world some nine years before I was even born- somehow managing to drag along my brother with me._

And hadn't _that_ been an interesting conversation. Regulus _still_ wanted to meet both Hatake Sakumo _and_ Namikaze Minato.

(Though it was probably good that he found his otouto before he'd gotten attached to the name Ahaakka Takeshi- Kokujin Koushaku was _definitely_ better. He wasn't sure what he'd been thinking but he blamed it on being _five_ for the _third_ time.

On having to experience **_puberty_ ** for a _third time_.)

A twist of chakra captured his attention and he called out. "Futon! Five o'clock! 10 seconds!"

" _Shinobi_." Sakudo scoffed, wings beating raise their altitude before the summon twisted so it flew at an angle so that the long blade-like gust of wind could pass harmlessly.

Really, ninja needed better ways to deal with airborne enemies then tossing jutsu at them and hoping it'd hit. Maybe he and Regulus could reinvent brooms here?

A disgruntled squawk sounded, signaling that their younger siblings arrived. "I hate not being able to just fly out of range!"

"I met Otousan!" Regulus said by way of greeting, delight lighting up the now four year old's face. "He's _nasty_." This was said with an unholy kind of glee that he'd last seen when they had been putting their heads together with the twins about traps during the war.

"Layered Raiton and Futon!" Hayai complained as she ducked under a flashy fire jutsu. "He cost me _feathers_! _He **singed** a _**tail** **feather**!"

Kakashi focused on his brother now that the two summons were present to watch for jutsu. "Did you manage to set it up before getting yourself chased?"

"Of course." Regulus huffed, "The bridge is ready to be used, the only thing needed is to connect it to Uzu which is set for when the cuffs," he said referring to the runic fūinjutsu cuffs the eagles wore that allowed them to be summoned. "Get's within a certain distance. Instant bridge."

Kakashi nodded and called to the, now bickering (something about aerial maneuvers), summons. "Pick up speed! I want us to reach Uzu before nightfall! And-"

" _'Don't go too fast for the shinobi to tire themselves out following us.'_ " Hayai repeated, resigned.

When they arrived at Uzushiogakure as the sky bled to night, it was in style.

Hayai, having dove into the sea to collect water, descended on the burning village like a kind of water kami, putting out the fires and providing more water for the mainly suiton-aligned Uzu-nin then their dammed river. The large group of Konoha-nin split in two to both evacuate the civilians (using a conveniently placed bridge) and assist the flagging Uzu-nin (Regulus was right, Tousan was nasty). Sakudo descended on the advancing Iwa-Kumo combo in a whirlwind of fire that would have done Fawkes proud.

* * *

 **Or where a formerly wizard Kakashi saves Uzushiogakure with his little brother by teasing Konoha-nin until they give chase.**


	64. Haruno Yasu-o

**Haruno Yasu-o**

 **.**

* * *

.

"Hey, hey, Yasu-o." Naruto added the 'o' as an afterthought. "Why don't you like your name?"

The now teenage, pink-haired (with this kind of luck he'd end up reborn again but with _lime green_ hair) Kakashi glanced at his sensei's son from where he was weeding. "It's too feminine."

And would have been worse if he hadn't been basically _silent_ when born, his new parents had been planning on naming him _Sakura_ of all things.

"But-...you're a _girl_." the blond said in tactless confusion, on the other side of him Sasuke gave a kind of _twitch_ and his older-alternate self made an aborted motion to pinch the bridge of his nose from where he leant against a tree.

Yasuo sent his teammate a flat look as he yanked a weed from the ground with a bit more chakra-assisted force then absolutely necessary. "I was born female but _I am **male**_."

"How?"

Really, it was only how puppy-like the blond looked that allowed him to keep his patience. "You've henged into Hokage-sama before haven't you?" He waited for a nod before adding, "Just because you appear like something doesn't mean you are it."

"Oh…" Naruto looked thoughtful. "Then...what does your family think about you being a boy?"

His voice was flat as he answered, standing to carry an armful of displaced weeds to their 'pit' that the jinchuuriki had somehow convinced them to make- burning the weeds would work just as well to get rid of them. "It's not something they want to listen to. The were expecting a little princess to spoil, they got me."

"But you-..!" the blond looked upset even if he didn't know how to verbalize it- even Sasuke was frowning from where he was pretending to be ignoring them.

Uchiha, _honestly_.

"We've compromised. I'm not forced into dresses or skirts if I behaved myself in an acceptably kunoichi-like way- hence learning to use a _shukusen_ as my primary weapon and learning _...other_ skills." Yasuo stated bluntly. "Doesn't mean I'll be sticking around once I've made chūnin."

"You-" Naruto flailed, just a bit. "You're _family_!"

Something sardonic spread over his face, "Sometimes that's not enough, Naruto-kun."

* * *

 **Or where Kakashi has gender issues on top of identity issues.**


	65. Sabaku no Hiroshi

**Sabaku no Hiroshi**

 **.**

* * *

.

"What." It was a question and demand all at once, oozing with _intent_ that was a shade away from being murderous.

Kankuro paled and sand curled around Hiroshi in a possessive grip, trying to pull him closer to Gaara from where he stood between his brothers and his once kage. It was noted. "Sunagakure is planning on invading Konohagakure during the third portion of the Chunin Exams with the assistance of Otogakure."

"Why should we trust you? You _betray_ your village by telling us." Hiroshi had to admit he was kind of impressed with his younger self, it usually took an angry Gaara for Kankuro to twitch like that.

But he had once been Hokage, he wasn't about to quail to his pre-Akatsuki self, _especially_ not when he was the only thing keeping his siblings from being dragged to T &I. This was also noted. "Sunagakure isn't so populated to seamlessly deal with the losses we'd garner from an attack on Konohagakure even if it _were_ successful, the logistics of it would lead to our end far quicker then any steadily declining budget would- not to mention what the other major villages would do once they believe that we may potentially attack _them_. On top of that there would be the repercussions of using the Chunin Exams as a way to attack, worse case scenario being that we're all pushed into a Fourth Shinobi War that _none_ of us wants."

He was honestly surprised that war hadn't broken out last time, that it never became more then border skirmishes.

"You've thought this out." the Hokage mused, looking thoughtful and those in the room (one Hatake Kakashi, Nara Shikaku and Jiraiya of the Sannin) relaxed just a bit.

Hiroshi's face was bland and voice dry. "I _did_ have to argue the Elders to seek an audience with you over this matter."

"Oh?" Jiraiya questioned, amusement covering the sly fish for information. "And how pleased were they that a _genin_ came and bugged them?"

"Ecstatic." He said, voice flat. "The poisoned senbon thrown at me until I got around to the 'impersonated kage' bit was full of affection, I'm sure."

The Nara's eyes narrowed. "You didn't mention that your kage was impersonated."

"Because it sounds like an excuse." He told the Nara bluntly. "And it's not something that anyone beyond his children has caught, Otousama wasn't a very approachable person."

Kankuro flinched but Gaara remained unmoved beyond the sand still curled possessively around him even if it was no longer trying to move him. This, too, was noticed. "Given the timeframe of when we were last certain that it was him and who he had interacted with, our best guess is that he was assassinated and then impersonated by Orochimaru."

"And why," Jiraiya asked, words coated with focused _intent_. "Was he meeting with Orochimaru?"

Green eyes flicked to the sannin, "There was an offered solution to Sunagakure's current financial crisis. Given that we were rationing food _before_ receiving a message from our Daimyo about how he wouldn't require as many of as shinobi due to a contract with Konohagakure, I doubt Otousama was feeling sympathetic enough towards your village to turn away a Konoha-nukenin offering assistance."

"You," Smoke came out of the Hokage's pipe in an amused puff. "Already have a plan, don't you?"

"Yes." Hiroshi's smile was grim, sharp and not a little bit vicious.

And it was also noted.

* * *

 **Is it odd that I really like Suna!Kakashi?**

 **Sabaku no Hiroshi:**  
 _ **Timeline: 6th Hokage**_  
 _ **Born: March 21**_  
 _ **Age: 2 Years older then Naruto**_


	66. Yamanaka Inori

**Yamanaka Inori**

 **.**

* * *

.

The first time he woke it was to, "He's waking-"

Then he realized that he wasn't technically awake and there were people in his head. He promptly freaked the hell out, drawing every single painful memory he had and pressing it around him to create a vicious, spiked wall that was trapped- the people lasted maybe fifteen minutes before retreating from his mind and he readily sank into unconsciousness.

.

The second time he came around it was to, "Kakashi-"

And he lashed out with everything that made up his wall at the fucker who dared to use his dead Sensei's voice- wanting them to feel the _hurt_ -Pain- ** _WHY_ ** that dwelt in those memories. He felt smug going under, the group didn't even last a minute.

.

The third time he awoke it was to, "Kakashi."

He prepared a second time to lash out, furious the invaders returned, when-

" _The Reaper's scythe can cut them down but on the Harvest's breath, the joyful susurration sighs that Life is born of Death. So seeds of Life are born today as corn is gathered in_ ,"

And he shuddered, unable to do anything but continue with, " _For every seed of golden grain will grow another Spring. Death in Life and Life in Death, the joyful news proclaim: That from the scythe that ushers Death, Life will come again_."

Slowly, bit by bit-

 _The corn is cut,  
The grain is stored_

-he let go of the memories-

 _And in the sleeping Earth  
Are whispers of the coming Spring,_

-and got his first view of the people entering his head.

Yamanaka Inoichi. Nara Shikaku. Namikaze Minato. Sarutobi Hiruzen. Jiraiya.

And Hatake Sakumo, finishing a song from his childhood that he'd thought he'd forgotten, " _And glorious rebirth_."

* * *

 **I really don't get Yamanakas. Basically concerned Yamanaka parents wanted to make sure their was nothing wrong their toddler, stumbled over memories that really shouldn't have been there took it to the Hokage who wanted to question the kid but no one could calm him down until Sakumo (incidentally this saved Sakumo's life). Also, the song is a Harvest Song (I literally searched 'harvest song' and it popped up).**

 **Yamanaka Inori:**  
 _ **Timeline: Naruto Returns**_  
 _ **Born: May 17**_  
 _ **Age: 7 Years older then Naruto**_

 _ **.**_

 _ **.**_

 _ **...[I don't think I like Yamanakas...]**_


	67. As We Are

**As We Are**

 **.**

* * *

.

 _"I'm sure you've all heard by now that Iwa has been testing our borders since confirmation of the Sandaime Hokage's death…"_

Kakashi methodically checked his weaponry, the mission his team was being sent on wasn't particularly risky but, well-...

 _"...have gotten word that Kumo has been testing our north-eastern borders. These attacks aren't structured, they are not well coordinated, and it's too early to tell more then if they're just testing our strength after an invasion and the loss of a Hokage- if they're testing_ me _as the new Hokage- but we will be acting as if we're about to be pushed into war…"_

…-it never hurt to prepare for the worst, at least then you only get pleasant surprises. Team Seven would be heading south before swinging west-...

 _"...Kurenai and Gai's teams will do a circuit in the northern half of the country, to warn civilians they may need to evacuate south. Asuma's team will be heading south to the capital, Kakashi's team will accompany them until they reach Keishi before heading west to Sunagakure- you both have mission scrolls with more details…"_

…-to Suna to check on their position if war were to break out. Both his and Asuma's assignments weren't ones that you'd typically have genin on but Asuma was one of Hi no Kuni's Daimyo's Twelve Guardians and Naruto had made an impact on Suna's jinchuuriki- that, that counted for something.

Enough to send _genin_ on a _j_ _ōnin_ assignment.


	68. Theme 1 : Birth

**Theme 1 : Birth**

 **.**

* * *

.

"Stillborn." Sukka-san grunted, nudging the still body of a pup off to the side. Tousan looked as if he were about to disagree, to try and fix the pup somehow but the bitch huffed a "Here comes the next one." and the man was distracted.

Kakashi though, had already finished his job of carrying the latest puppy to the little nest that Sukka-san would move to after the birthing was finished- leaving the wriggling fur-worms under Kuro-chan's care, so he picked up the discarded pup. It was damp but odd sac-thing it had been in was mostly gone (he pulled away bits clinging to the rear legs) and the cord-thing had already been bit then tied off so he started rubbing it like he'd seen Tousan do.

"Kaka-" He blinked, looking up at his father even as he kept rubbing the pup _(it was so still)_ and saw his father staring at him with an odd expression. It was kind of like the look Tousan got when he asked about Okaasan before he'd stopped, not liking how quiet and still _(why isn't it moving yet?)_ his father got after. The jōnin swallowed and looked away _(why? what's wrong Tousan? do you know why the puppy hasn't moved?)_ towards Kuro-chan's twin, "Shiro-kun, take this one to the others."

Kakashi glanced around, head tilting (hands rubbing and rubbing and rubbing- _why don't you move?)_ at how the adult ninken all had expressions mirroring Tousan's. "...what?"

"Nothing, Kashi-chan." Kuro-chan answered but she sound both tired and sad, like Tousan did when he asked _(stop asking questions, you only make Tousan sad.)_ about the Second War.

Shiro-kun sat, watching him (as his hands rubbed and rubbed and rubbed) with old, _old_ (which was weird because Shiro-kun was only _five_ ) eyes. "Don't you want to watch the other pups, Kashi-kun?"

"Not yet," he told the white-furred wolfhound (rubbing, rubbing, rubbing). "I want this one to wake up first." He stalled (before his hands rubbed, rubbed, rubbed) when his father let out a smothered, choked kind of noise. "...Touchan?" He didn't say it that often anymore, not since he'd met Jiraiya and the man started teasing his father about it, but sometimes it slipped out before he could change it to the more appropriate _(why is it, though? why make fun of Tousan?)_ version.

Tousan let out another noise and said in a tired, _tired_ _(this is why- not supposed to say it)_ voice. "It's nothing, Kakashi."

He _(was bad bad **bad-** can't do anything right)_ blinked (hands rubbing, rubbing, rubbing _and rubbing_ ) and said. "Okay."

* * *

 **Ya know, I saw this theme and I was so excited- was going to write something fluffy about Pakkun being born and then _this_ came out. (I now feel sad.)**


	69. Theme 3 : Love

**Theme 3 : Love**

 **.**

* * *

.

Weeding was a simple task, something that had come up often in his early life- from Genin to Academy Student to the time preceding that, Kakashi had been assigned the task of weeding. The most recent time was with Sensei, of course, and had left him tired and sore when the blond had slapped a seal on him then set him to the task without the benefit of chakra; his time as an Academy Student had him pulling weeds that littered Konoha Cemetery in a tense kind of awkward silence born from students _wanting_ to talk but wary to do so when surrounded by graves.

The first time he had pulled weeds was when he was a toddler, mobile and energetic and entirely disinclined to being inactive. It wasn't that his father had _told_ him to start weeding, the man had set him to wander the garden (to poke and prod at the odd plants that he'd only seen when being carried past them) while Sakumo tended to it. Kakashi had delighted in being set free to sate his curiosity, taking to carrying interesting things he didn't know about to his father or dragging the man from his work to come over and explain whatever odd thing Kakashi wanted to know about-...

 _"Look! It looks like the purple-things we sometimes eat, what is Touchan?"_

 _"It's called an eggplant. And it is the 'purple-things' we eat."_

 _"It looks different."_

 _"Haha. That's because it hasn't been cut or cooked. Also it isn't done growing yet- it won't be finished growing for about another month."_

 _"...oh. Okay."_

…-with a patience that he didn't really admire until he was older. After a while, once he'd learned the name of every plant in sight, Kakashi had grown bored and wandered over to inspect what his father had been doing. He'd initially attempted to copy his father, grabbing onto the crabgrass and yanking but neither his grip nor had his balance been good and he went tumbling to the ground, his father's laughter following him. Sakumo had been suitably apologetic to sooth his toddler self after, showing him how to properly pull the weeds from the ground- the two ending up with a vague system of Kakashi yanking the crabgrass from the ground and Sakumo making sure the roots had all been removed until Kakashi had gotten tired enough for a nap.

Cleaning was a likewise simple task, one that appeared frequently throughout life; from weapons to dishes to clothes to rooms and more. Weapon care was something taught at the Academy (typically during second year for dull weapons and later third year for live weapons), it was something that both his teacher and father had decided he shouldn't do alone as a genin- as if he were going to trip and impale himself on a kunai. Any other kind of cleaning was learnt from either D-Ranks or house chores-...

 _"What are you doing Kakashi?"_

 _"Taking the desk chair."_

 _"...why are you taking the desk chair?"_

 _"Need it."_

 _"...why do you need the desk chair?"_

 _"So I can reach."_

 _"...alright. What are you trying to reach that you need to drag the desk chair along with you?"_

 _"Dishes!"_

…-that he'd insisted on doing once he'd decided he was 'old enough'.

 **But.**

Each year, on March 30, those simple tasks seemed so heavy.

 _Because-_

Kakashi sighed, sealing away his cleaning supplies and using a controlled burst of chakra to burn the weeds before standing. The storage scroll was tucked away and Kakashi turned to the grave, managing a smile as he said, "Happy birthday Tousan."

* * *

 **As you can see, I _won't_ be putting up all 100 themes here- only my favorites (if you want to read all 100, then it's under the title 'A Hundred Things').**


	70. Hake Kama

**Hake Kama**

 **.**

* * *

.

"...I don't like you." The newly five year old Hatake Kakashi announced bluntly.

The twenty-seven year old Kakashi yet five year old Hake Kama blinked, even as both Tou- _Sensei_ and Sen- _Namikaze-san_ seemed to deflate where they were watching. "Alright." Then turned to his once father now sensei and said. "Sakumo-sensei? Can we go on our first C-Rank with Namikaze-san and Henohenomoheji-kun?"

Tiny Kakashi twitched, eyes narrowing like he wasn't sure if that was a poke at his name or not.

Kama just smiled.

Both adults looked like they regretted introducing them. "I think we can manage it, Kama-kun." Sakumo eventually said.

"Ne, you were born September 15, right? I was born in January." Kama said, tucking his chin into his scarf (blue with little scythes in black decorating the ends) to hide his smirk, in an innocent voice. "You can call me 'senpai' if you want, Henohenomoheji- _chan_."

 _This,_ Kama thought wickedly, smirk growing into a grin behind his scarf as he dodged the five year old Hatake's lunge then parried a kunai stab- the two genin both ignoring their jōnin-sensei's protests over fighting (not that either would have argued with them _sparring_ , just not while _inside_ ). _Could be **fun.**_

* * *

 **This is SIOC/TimeTravel _No. 6_.**

 **Hake** **Kama:** **  
** ** _Timeline: 5th Hokage  
Born: January 16  
Age: 13 years older then Naruto_**


	71. Nara Shikata

**Nara Shikata**

 **.**

* * *

.

Nara, as a kind of unspoken rule, are not front-line fighters; with their clan jutsu, knack for strategy and propensity to work well with the Akimichi and Yamanaka, they were practically bred for capture rather then combat. The Clan Head was an exemplary example of this, strengthening the ties with their allies by working alongside the Akimichi and Yamanaka Clan Heads since they were all heirs- a system which lead to heirs to being born within the same year.

 _Which makes me so abnormal,_ Shikata mused as he checked over his mission pack on last time before soldering it on in a way that allowed him to easily draw the tonfa that were sheathed on his back.

(The tonfa were new, something he'd only used once -if one counted disarming an enemy with a tonfa and then using it to bludgeon it's previous owner- as Kakashi, but something he felt suited this life well enough; it got him in close enough range to easily use clan jutsu since no one expected any of his clan to fight with tonfa of all things.

Nara weren't combat specialists after all.)

While he hadn't, technically, been passed over as the next potential Clan Head, it was widely expected that his younger brother would end up as the next Head- if only because the Clan believed that he wouldn't live long enough to actually be named the Head of the Clan (not that anyone would _say_ such a thing but, well, a shinobi doesn't need to _say_ something for it to be understood).

"You were almost late, Shikata." the kunoichi of his Genin team, though none of them were actually genin anymore they still frequently partnered (even if only with one other member) with each other on missions, told him.

Part of him, the part that would always be Hatake Kakashi, wanted to tell her about all the times he had been late and rattle off former excuses but the time for that had since ended (Obito was alive, there was no reason to act as a living memorial). "I wouldn't miss your first mission as a jōnin, Mikoto."

"Damn right you wouldn't- it's your fucking fault anyways." the Uchiha scoffed, referring to how her clan had pushed her into becoming a jōnin just because he'd became a jōnin and the Uchiha couldn't seem inferior to the _Nara_. "I was happy being a chūnin."

"Maa," their former sensei, current team leader, said. "There's no need for such language, Mikoto-chan. Kizashi-kun would be horrified if he was here."

Haruno Kizashi, Sakura's future father, the final member of their former genin team who was a long-range fighter whom- rather disturbingly- reminded Shikata of Gai.

The irritable Uchiha huffed, "Kizashi's in the hospital because he challenged _Maito Dai_ to a _taijutsu_ fight."

Yes, Kizashi did remind him of Gai.

* * *

 **This is SIOC/TimeTravel #7. Any Guess on who their Sensei is/was?**

 **Nara Shikata:** **  
** ** _Timeline: Invasion of Pain  
Born: March 15  
Age: 28 years older then Naruto_**


	72. Ideas 2

**Ideas 2**

 **.**

* * *

.

Aburame Swarm:

Three years into the Second War and during the late spring, as the Aburame Clan was shifting between leaderships, a group of Iwa shinobi attempted to attack the village- it was to their misfortune that they stumbled into the Aburame, disrupting the Clan's ceremony and pissing off every single Aburame present. What happened is an event that lives in infamy.

.

To Be a Sensei:

"It wasn't something he'd prepared for, when he passed the team. They weren't at war, it was a time of _peace_ \- he didn't think he _needed_ to prepare for such an event. But. He was _wrong_ and now- now his genin were _gone_. And, come hell or high water, Kakashi _was going to get them **back**_."

OR

Where in Team Seven gets kidnapped and Kakashi was going to get them back no matter what it takes.

.

Rutoké:

When you are born, you are not born alone- that first night, that first sleep, an egg forms beside you. The beings that hatch from these eggs are called a number of things; from Partner, Other and Alternate to Half-of-Me, Part-of-Me and Familiar. These beings hatch anywhere from six months to six years and when they hatch a Pair Bond is formed- a tie between both of your minds and hearts which lasts until death. These beings are called Pokémon.

OR

The Pokémon/Naruto crossover that goes a step further and has Pokémon as daemons.

.

Collapse:

Chakra is a natural phenomena, jutsu, however, _aren't_ natural and the usage of them puts a strain on the world's chakra system.

Everything has a cost.

Shinobi battles from the Warring States to the Shinobi World Wars kept straining and straining the system until, finally, it. Just. _Broke_.

(Or, The Naruto Apocalypse)

.

Missing:

It wasn't that Kakashi had _intended_ to become a nukenin. It just _happened_ \- he wasn't even sure _how_.

.

Genius:

"I am called a prodigy, a _genius_." Kakashi said, darkly amused. "You'd think they'd learned by now, ne, _Obito-kun_?" He laughed when his once teammate _(traitor-traitor **traaaai-toooor~**_ his mind sang) flinched, trying to scramble away from him but unable to. "The thing about geniuses is- we're all a bit mad."

OR

The one where in Kakashi is not exactly sane and he find out that Obito didn't really die.


	73. Peacekeeper

**Peacekeeper**

 **.**

* * *

.

"Winner: Hatake Kakashi!"

A pair of medics came to carry away the unconscious genin, perhaps pinning the Kumo-nin with wire and then electrocuting him was a bit much but-...

 _"Pathetic little **monster** , I bet your father can't stand you. Your sensei probably only entered you so he wouldn't have to deal with you any more- he was likely disappointed you didn't die already."_

...-he really didn't care.

Kakashi walked off the field on his own power, slumping slightly when a medic accosted him in the exit tunnel but he didn't argue over being fussed over. It was there that Tousan and Sensei met up with him, the blond grinning while his father took on an amused expression at his resigned posture to the medic.

"He's fine." the medic eventually declared. "Tired but that's expected. Make sure he eats a hearty meal then gets a good night's sleep- have him sleep in if possible too, extra rest will only do him good."

Sensei nodded to the kunoichi as Tousan stooped to grab him and place him on the man's shoulders. "I'll request to be informed of the decision on his promotion rather then him being summoned." Sensei promised.

"That leaves the meal, hmm?" Tousan said musingly, "I wonder where could we possibly-"

Kakashi huffed, tugging on his dad's hair. " _Snack Akimichi_. You promised if I did well and I won." He reminded.

"Hmm…" Tousan hummed thoughtfully. "I don't know...I can't remember saying something like that-" He grabbed a handful of hair and _yanked_. "Ow-ow-ow!" But Tousan was laughing so he knew it was fine. "Alright! Snack Akimichi it is! Who am I to argue with the Tournament Champion?"

Sensei deadpanned. "Certainly not his father." And Kakashi tossed a kunai at the blond, not even having to look for him to know his teacher had caught the weapon and stowed it away. "So cranky, Kakashi-chan, one would assume you'd lost or something."

"I won the Chūnin Exams," Kakashi protested. "Drop the '-chan'."

The blond sped up slightly, turning so he'd see the playful mischief lighting his teacher's face. "Maybe a nap would put you in a better mood, ne, _Kakashi- **chan**_?"

" _Children_." Tousan said, amused, before he'd done more then reach for his weapon pouch. It _was_ satisfying to see Sensei turn a light red and cough embarrassedly at the admonishment. "We're here."


	74. Pokémon Summoner

**Pokémon Summoner**

 **.**

* * *

.

 _That's not a dog,_ was the first thing running through Kakashi's mind as he looked at the creature he summoned.

It was about eighty centimeters in height and looked vaguely like a horse, if horses were black with thick, double pointed white stripes on their neck, chest, back and hind legs. To say nothing of the rounded muzzle that held a large, dark nose or the oval blue on yellow eyes or how bellow the knees the legs were white with black hooves. Or the stubby, two pointed white tail. Or the short, triangular ears that were blue on the inside. He wasn't even going to think about the lightning bolt-shaped mane in white that seemed to be bristling with electricity.

 _"Bliiitz..?"_ the creature said in a vaguely confused tone.

 _Horses,_ Kakashi thought, _do_ not _say 'blitz'._

It's, absurdly large, nose twitched as it, apparently, scented the air, forelegs stamping in a manner that seemed almost nervous. It's ears twitched then seemed to focus on something just a moment before it's head swung towards him, yellow-blue eyes blinking.

 _"Tzle?"_ it seemed to ask before starting forwards.

Kakashi took a moment to regard the odd creature approaching him, thought _nope_ and abruptly canceled the summon- the creature disappearing in a puff of smoke.

"So." He said to the empty training ground, throwing the dog summoning contract a slightly betrayed glare. " _That_ happened."

Kakashi returned the next day to try again, it wasn't that unusual for things to not work out as intended the first time someone tried summoning something.

His second attempt wasn't the horse-thing, but it still wasn't a dog.

This creature was half the first's size at forty centimeters and was human-like in shape, it's body white. It's limbs were thin though the legs widened towards the feet, a wispy extension trailing the back of said feet which gave the impression of a dress or nightgown. It's eyes were a pinkish red that peeked from under a green helmet (or bowl-cut hair?) that had two flat, red-pink horns on top- the front one larger then the back.

It's head swung about to look around, _"Raaall?"_

A kind of frustrated confusion rose because all Kakashi wanted was to summon a ninken and he had no idea what or how he was summoning these odd creatures.

It's head swung towards him, pink-red eyes focused before, _Hello?_

Kakashi started at the- feminine- voice, regarding the odd creature with a significantly increased amount of wariness. "Did you just-..?"

 _Speak? Yes and no. I am still unable to say anything beyond my name and variations of it- at least how a human would understand it- but I'm also a Psychic type so I can project my thoughts, letting me 'speak' with you._ The mind-voice said, pausing before asking. _Do you know how I got here? Or where 'here' is exactly?_

"...this is Training Ground 13 in Konohagakure." Kakashi eventually told it (her?). "I was attempting to summon ninken but you got called instead."

 _Ninken?_ Pink-red eyes blinked, head tilting slightly then there was a kind of _press_ on his head- a bit like someone had grabbed it- before it's head straightened. _Ohhh! Ninja dogs. You're a ninja!? That's really cool! The closest I've ever heard of there being something like that were Greninja!_

"What-" He, just barely, managed to keep his volume level and tone polite. "-did you just do?"

It's front horn seemed to twitch and then it drooped, seeming to radiate a kind of regretful nervousness. _I didn't know what you meant by ninken. Since I'm a psychic-type I just kind of- searched for the meaning in your mind...I was very careful though! And I didn't look at anything personal!_

"Don't-" Kakashi started before thinking about the implications of it not knowing about ninken and him not knowing what kind of creature it was then said. "Just-...ask before you do that. What's your name?"

 _Ralts!_ It sent, significantly more cheerful. _What's yours?_

"Kakashi." He told it. "What _are_ you?"

 _Ralts._

He blinked, "I thought that was your name."

It's head tilted. _It is. My name is Ralts but I'm also a Ralts. My name can change if my trainer- which I guess is you- decides to give me a nickname but I'll still be Ralts._ A paused then almost like an afterthought, _I'm also a Pokémon._

"What's a Pokémon?" Seemed like a relevant question.

Ralts proceeded to tell him along with how the world it came from worked, around the time it mentioned pokemon from outer space and Creator of the World, Kakashi just- _sat down_.

 _If you want to know why you seem to be summoning us,_ Ralts ended. _Your best bet would be asking a Legendary. Maybe Lugia? He seemed to get on with that human that one time so he'd probably answer you._

A beat where it seemed to be waiting for something before it said, _It was nice to meet you! I'll try to get a Pokédex for the next time you summon me- maybe more then one to cover the different regions? Mom can teach me teleport- which should help. Oh! And maybe ask a professor to write a handbook for you and- well, Mom will help me figure it out. Bye._

Then it was gone in a puff of smoke.

"I just wanted a ninken pack." Kakashi told the training ground, inwardly wondering if this was something he was supposed to report and what he was going to do with the ninken summon contract since it obviously wouldn't be working for him. "Maybe Tenzou would get some use out of it…"

* * *

 **Omake - Blitzle:**

Blitzle looked around when the smoke cleared, finding himself back with his herd.

His sister, already evolved into a Zebstrika, started. _"Blitzle!? What happened? Where'd you go?"_

 _"I don't know."_ Blitzle told her truthfully. _"There was this human though...he was black and white, with a spiky white mane and he felt like an electric-type. It was like meeting a human Blitzle or maybe Zebstrika..."_

.

 **Omake - Ralts:**

 _Ralts!_ A Gardevoir projected with relief. _What happened!? Where were you?_

Ralts let her mother hold her, _I got a trainer, Mom. He's a ninja! From an entirely different world._

 _Different world-?_ Her mother's mind voice seemed almost choked.

Ralts blinked but didn't ask. _Oh! Can you teach me Teleport? There's a few things I need to get for next time. Speaking of, do you know where the nearest Pokemon Professor lives? Maybe it'd be better if I went to Professor Oak first…_

Gardevoir was lost.

.

* * *

.

 **[longer now since I wanted Kakashi to at least know what he was summoning]**

 **Pokémon are randomly chosen [with the help of random. or (g)], how it's done is:  
 _Type_  
 _Pure, Primary or Secondary Type_  
 _Pokémon_**

 **Legendary Pokémon may be chosen but their names are entered only once to all the other Pokémon's 2; Canine Pokémon are the most likely to be picked as their names are entered 3 times to the standard 2. Level done in increments of 5/10/15 depending on if it's evolved or not. It's nature will also be randomized as will abilities- if there's even an ability, how many and which specific one. If a Pokémon, once it reaches the needed level, evolves will be decided on a coin flip.**

 **Once he summons a Pokémon, it's 'set'- as in he'll only summon that specific Pokémon of if it comes to summoning it's specific species. So if he ever summons a Blitzle it'll be this same one (he would only have multiple of the same Pokémon if one evolves). A bit more about his two Pokémon;**

 **Blitzle;**  
 _ **Level: 50**_  
 _ **Ability: Sap Sipper**_  
 _ **Gender: Male**_  
 _ **Nature: Careful**_

 **Ralts;**  
 _ **Level: 30**_  
 _ **Ability: N/A**_  
 _ **Gender: Female**_  
 _ **Nature: Calm**_

.

 _ **Last thing, I'm planning on doing something special for Ch. 77 (since I didn't for Ch. 7) so vote on my poll (found on my profile) to give an opinion.**_


	75. Crossover - Protector and Teacher

**Protector and Teacher**

 **(Or The Merlin/Naruto Crossover about Kakashi and Merlin switching spots without Merlin or Kakashi ever appearing.)**

 **.**

* * *

.

 **Failure.**

 _Agreement._

 **Inquiry?**

 _Success...at great cost._

 **Similar. Alter?**

 _...Alter?...Yes. How?_

 **Focal point- who?**

 _Human Uzumaki Naruto. Peacemaker. Inquiry?_

 **Human Arthur Pendragon. Once and Future King. Alteration?**

 _….Negative. Too different. Too pivotal to handle divergence. Focal point's main support?_

 **Protector Merlin. Wife Guinevere. Knight(s) Leon, Gwaine, Elyan and Percival. Healer Gaius. Inquiry?**

 _Teacher Kakashi. Wife Hinata. Team Sasuke, Sakura, Sai and Yamato(...Tenzo?). Demon Kurama. Alteration?_

 **Demon-Healer: Negative. Wife-Wife: Negative.**

 _Knight-Team?_

 **Leon-Sasuke: Negative. Gwaine-Sakura: Negative. Elyan-Sai: Negative. Percival-Yamato/Tenzo: ...inquiry- opinion?**

 _...Negative. Limited interference. Result: alteration ignorable._

 **...Agreement. Final: Protector-Teacher?**

 _Intended sphere of influence: Present. Switch compatibility?_

 **Allowable. Protector suited as Focal Point Uzumaki Naruto's Teacher. Inquiry of reverse?**

 _Teacher suited as Focal Point Arthur Pendragon's Protector. Proceed with alteration?_

 **Proceeding. Memory wipe?**

 _Negative. Skills learnt helpful for future tasks._

 **Concern. Human feeling LOVE/GRIEF may harm Teacher/Protector's performance if memory kept.**

 _Agreement. Point stands: skills useful. Proposal: Mute Teacher/Protector's feelings of LOVE/GRIEF towards memories until tasks completed?_

 **Proposal heard; Alteration: Mute ALL feeling towards memories until task completion?**

 _Agreement._

 **Alteration accepted. Inquiry: Knowledge of Mirror's failed attempts?**

 _Helpful for task completion: agreement._

 **Understood.**

 _...inquiry: procedure following task completion?_

 **Uncertainty….return?**

 _Explanation required for such._

 **...acceptable. Procedure following task completion: Return with explanation and removal of feeling muting.**

 _Alteration: Include Focal Points and Main Supports. Inquiry: Include Teacher/Protector's Support?_

 **Alteration accepted. Inquiry...agreement. Reward for task completion.**

 _Procedure following task completion: Removal of muting and return with explanation that includes Focal Points, Main Supports and Teacher/Protector's Support._

 **Agreement….Switch-**

 _-Complete._

.

* * *

.

 **Basically the result of a long rambling thought of _'Merlin would be a fun teacher- Kakashi is A LOT sneaker then Merlin, he's practically made for "protecting from the shadows". What if they switched? WHY would they switch? Rebirth? Reincarnation? Really odd Spell/Jutsu gone wrong that somehow tosses them into each others bodies- hmmm, interesting. Remember- language barrier. Damn. Rebirth then? How does that even happen? Huh, chakra and magic. What if..- Conscious thought? They make it happen? WHY? ...doesn't really need to be explained if told from Kakashi or Merlin's POV. But. What kind of conversation would that BE? Hmm...'_ and here we are. Why are the voices like that? I just kept trying for "less human" and running into "what does that even _mean_ " but eventually settled with this.**

.

 _ **Last thing, I'm planning on doing something special for Ch. 77 (since I didn't for Ch. 7) so vote on my poll (found on my profile) to give an opinion.**_


	76. MoH

**MoH**

 **(Or The time travel fic where Kakashi _cannot_ be Human and starts off like Story Time)**

 **.**

* * *

.

Once upon a time there was a little Scarecrow.

The Scarecrow never knew his mother, he was raised by his father- the Wolfkin whom summoned his fur-pelt kin to him in battle. For the first three years of his life, Scarecrow was almost entirely raised by Wolfkin and the Furpelts.

In his fourth year, the Scarecrow was sent to school to interact with others near his age. In his fifth, Scarecrow was finished with school and assigned to Storm. In his sixth year, Scarecrow advanced further though he remained with Storm as his teacher.

Time passed, Wolfkin died and the Furpelts acknowledged themselves as Scarecrow's kin, then Storm decided that Scarecrow needed to interact with others his age once more so he formed a team. Scarecrow dubbed these two new 'teammates' as "Unwanted" and "Mouse-speaker", leaving Storm dismayed at how he refused to get along with the two.

Life moved on, Scarecrow advanced again and lead a hunt of his own- during this Unwanted died, saving Scarecrow. Here Unwanted became "Friend" and Mouse-speaker "Kind-heart". Not long after Kind-heart died.

Storm became the leader of their home, found himself a mate- Untamed- and died the night his son was born. Scarecrow disappeared into shadow, there were others whom would be better to care for Maelstrom after all.

There Scarecrow found Treekin, who would become Partner.

Eventually Wise-One, who retook his spot as leader after Storm's death, brought Scarecrow out of the shadows (letting Spirit find him) and made him a teacher of Maelstrom, Survivor and Blossom. The team fell apart; Survivor left to learn from Snake, Maelstrom with Toad and Blossom apprenticed under Slug. Scarecrow returned to shadow and Treekin though he checked up on Blossom still.

Three years after, Blossom and Maelstrom returned to form a team with Scarecrow- adding Treekin and Blankface. Many things happened but the important bit is this; the Living-Corpses attacked Scarecrow's home and Scarecrow _died._

Maelstrom convinced the controller of the Living-Corpses to return those killed- except Scarecrow did not return. In another timeline, Issun- he who shifts between forms, who cannot be human- is born.

.

* * *

.

 **Basically the result of a me wanting something that actually starts with "Once upon a time..."**

.

 _ **Last thing, I'm planning on doing something special for Ch. 77 (since I didn't for Ch. 7) so vote on my poll (found on my profile) to give an opinion.**_


End file.
